harvej Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 Been with new love for 4 months and hit it off great. She received an anonymous text from some dude saying she was messing with married man. I am not. I am divorced and have the records and showed the filing etc.. This freaked her out and she suddenly got cold. I proved that I was single and free to date and she agreed, but hasn't been the same ever since. She has not even kissed me since, nor invited me to dinner like she did twice a week. Now she is coming back around, but nowhere near where she was and she had confessed her love for me that very morning. I had the IP address traced back to a Centurylink CO and the Ip address came from business where another guy who has been chasing her for 2 years works. He is obviously a coward and was trying to ruin things between us by hiding behind this text message. Since she says he is 100% a friend and not attracted to him which I believe, I have not told her that I discovered it was him. The reason is that she now has me thinking of going NC on her and partly to help get her interest back. But I am also leaning on using NC to dump her because after her telling me she loved me and then freaking out and going cold and stepping back 20 steps, I am thinking she is a damaged person. She had a had a bad marriage and told me she often gets jealous and suspect, but this is ridiculous. She went for 100% into me to 50% in 12 hours because she freaked out about this stalker text message and I didn't do anything wrong. Am I foolish in thinking she really was in love with me? Seems that is she rally was, she would have discarded me or abandoned me so quickly during the first scare in the relationship. BTW: She knew I was divorced and she pursued me at first. I got hooked and fell for her too, but I think my feelings were real, and hers was infatuation apparently, but she would literally cry telling me how much she loved me and I was her dream catch. I can understand backing off, but it feels like she is heading towards friend zone and although there isn't anybody new, if there was, then she used me pretty badly an dumped me. If she is BPD, then I can understand why and she discards easily. I don't want to be in friend zone, and I need advice as I am leaning towards going NC and see what happens. Thank you friends. It is so sweet that you are here to help others, and I will try to reciprocate myself to help others too on this site. Have a great weekend! BTW: we are both 52 years old, so not new to relationships.
Smarty Pants Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 Been with new love for 4 months and hit it off great. She received an anonymous text from some dude saying she was messing with married man. I am not. I am divorced and have the records and showed the filing etc.. This freaked her out and she suddenly got cold. I proved that I was single and free to date and she agreed, but hasn't been the same ever since. She has not even kissed me since, nor invited me to dinner like she did twice a week. Now she is coming back around, but nowhere near where she was and she had confessed her love for me that very morning. I had the IP address traced back to a Centurylink CO and the Ip address came from business where another guy who has been chasing her for 2 years works. He is obviously a coward and was trying to ruin things between us by hiding behind this text message. Since she says he is 100% a friend and not attracted to him which I believe, I have not told her that I discovered it was him. The reason is that she now has me thinking of going NC on her and partly to help get her interest back. But I am also leaning on using NC to dump her because after her telling me she loved me and then freaking out and going cold and stepping back 20 steps, I am thinking she is a damaged person. She had a had a bad marriage and told me she often gets jealous and suspect, but this is ridiculous. She went for 100% into me to 50% in 12 hours because she freaked out about this stalker text message and I didn't do anything wrong. Am I foolish in thinking she really was in love with me? Seems that is she rally was, she would have discarded me or abandoned me so quickly during the first scare in the relationship. BTW: She knew I was divorced and she pursued me at first. I got hooked and fell for her too, but I think my feelings were real, and hers was infatuation apparently, but she would literally cry telling me how much she loved me and I was her dream catch. I can understand backing off, but it feels like she is heading towards friend zone and although there isn't anybody new, if there was, then she used me pretty badly an dumped me. If she is BPD, then I can understand why and she discards easily. I don't want to be in friend zone, and I need advice as I am leaning towards going NC and see what happens. Thank you friends. It is so sweet that you are here to help others, and I will try to reciprocate myself to help others too on this site. Have a great weekend! BTW: we are both 52 years old, so not new to relationships. Holy drama. You're 52. This is doomed to fail if this stuff is happening after 4 months. I'd drop it if I were you.
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