purplesorrow Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 I am implying no such thing. I am only saying that in some cases the WS may not be honest with the BS either and I think I would want to know if her story matched to his, for starters. And I am saying that I have to agree that this thread is very suggestive that the OW should not contact the BS at all. There is no point, if what most here are saying is true and she won't be believed anyway. I guess for me, I can only speak from mu experience. I question the op's motive. When she posted about the email in the ow/I'm section she said she didn't want them to save their marriage because she doesn't like the wife. The post about the very same email in this section says the opposite.
Hope Shimmers Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 She is a stranger to me. A complete stranger, she doesn't care about me. What reason do I have to trust her? This is my situation, I can only speak for me. She contacted me and lied to me in the guise of apologizing. Yes, I wanted the truth and I wanted it from the person in the marriage with me. In no other situation would I believe the words of someone I don't know. Are you implying that I could only get the truth if the ow chimed in? In my case, the BS would have had the truth from me, had she wanted it (she didn't). On the other hand, her WS gave her a completely watered down version of the truth in addition to outright lies. He had motivation to lie to her and I had none.
purplesorrow Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 In my case, the BS would have had the truth from me, had she wanted it (she didn't). On the other hand, her WS gave her a completely watered down version of the truth in addition to outright lies. He had motivation to lie to her and I had none. The more I read here, the more rare you are. I would feel completely different if my wh's ow approached things as you did. She was still too hung up on him and was willing to lie for him. She watered down, he was brutal. Thankfully my wh's story matched their correspondence and other evidence. Of course I don't know every detail and never needed to. I know what I needed.
whichwayisup Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 thank you for the advice, but I am not Christian so I will not go to church. I think it's because I got her mail again so I feel mad again. I haven't write back though. as I said, when I get more peace I will write her short apologize letter for what I was done. I know you have experience and that's why I ask my question here. and fellini, sorry about the pain you been though, but I am not your wife's OM, so you don't need put so much emotional words on my post. Block her emails. Let go of this and please try to move on. his wife is angry and upset and will continue to email you but eventually she will stop.
Author sisa Posted June 23, 2014 Author Posted June 23, 2014 I never say my intension is saving their marriage, and yes, I don't like her. I know I do the mistake that choose be with him when I know he is married. this part I want do apologized, but it's just difficult to do the sincere apologized to her when comtinous heard bad words from her side. when someone curse you and say you are dirty and ugly, it's hard to tell her that I am sorry and wish her well. I know not every BS is the same, everyone deal with things with different attitude, and not every OW is the same too. and I know some of the BS never have chance to hear the sorry from AP.
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