sene21 Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 I have been dating this guy for about 4 months now. Since our first date, He's been pretty consistent, we talk almost everyday through text or over the phone and we see each other every weekend but we have one problem, we do NOTHING when we are around each other! He picks me up on Friday night, we then go to his place and we just lay around, talk then eventually make love(not that great), same thing saturday night then sunday when its time for me to go home, i go with him to run errands then he takes me home. Its been like this EVERY weekend!! He says he miss me all week then just end up doing the same thing on the weekend. I have complained about it and he said he'll do something about it but it seems like nothing has changed. He's planning a out of state trip for a weekend and wants me to go but I don't know if its going to even happen because the deets are vague so we will see. But the issue still stands, at first I thought he was just tired because of his work week so he would just rather stay home but this is getting annoying. I really like him but I'm not used to this. What should I do? Should I wait a little longer? should I end things? I dont want to nag him, we all know men hate that! oh and keep in mind that he's a little stubborn! And what do you think is the problem??
chphan Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 Well... if you are making love or having sex, I wouldn't say you aren't doing nothing together. lol. Seem to be he has a homebody personality. Not everyone likes to go out and do stuff outside. Some people just prefer to stay home and are happy with it. Hence the concept of everyone is different from each other.
Allumere Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 he hasn't had to do anything it sounds like. when did you guys sleep together?
LostOnes05 Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 He may have a lot going on in his life that you may not know about or he thinks it's too early to share. I know when I had several deaths in my family back to back to back and a sick parent (who eventually passed away), work and school, I didn't want to do anything besides rest and chill around the house on the weekend. With that said, now I go out all the time...to the gym, movies, etc. There may be a valid reason for him wanting to stay home...Maybe he just wants to spend uninterrupted time with you...maybe he is just a homebody. Just ask him again. Better yet, why don't you plan something fun for the both of you. I'm certain he will appreciate it. Best of luck!!
kaylan Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 Suggest plans to him and see what he thinks. Just talk to him and say you wanna do more than chill at home or do errands all weekend. Or you can just bail now. Youre obviously bored and dont enjoy the sex. I figure youre going to dump him soon anyways. I say this as a fellow NYer; why waste his or your time? Theres loads of people to date here.
deathandtaxes Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 What you should do is plan some stuff for the weekend that you can do together. Stuff you like. If he doesn't want to do it with you, well, then dump his sorry ass. You're complaining, but you're not doing anything about it. YOU need to change it up. He either goes along or he doesn't. 6
Emilia Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 What do you mean you complained? Did you come up with specific plans on what you like doing and he ignored them? Or did you just complain in a general way without come up with ideas of your own? 1
Els Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 Well, if you really like the guy, this is what you can do: You make plans for an actual date night out with him. Then after that, tell him lightly that it's his turn next. Express how you enjoy going out on dates with him. Then see if he actually picks up the ball. I agree that it would be annoying to be the person initiating 100% of dates right from the start, but if you've never even initiated once, you can't really say much about it. If you don't really like him anyway, time to leave.
HappyLove Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 Why should he do more when you require so little? People only do what you allow them to.
PegNosePete Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 In my last relationship I wasn't really that into her but the sex was good so we just hung around at home, made dinner, watched TV etc. I didn't put too much effort in because I didn't think it would last long-term, but I was enjoying the short-term fun. My current gf, we have loads of exciting fun dates and outings, because I actually want it to last, I am putting effort in and so is she. Sounds like your relationship (or at least his feelings) is like the first scenario...
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