Lipitor11 Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I have a friend from work that constantly brings up the subject that I'm single and that I need to find a husband soon. She always tells me that she feels sorry for me because I don't have a man and tells me that I'm such a nice girl and she doesn't know why I'm not taken. She tries to set me up with her friends son, she tells me that I will be happy if I were to be married. I'm like WTF? I told her that I don't need a man to be happy, she got snappy and said, "oh, I'm just telling you that, because you are quiet and I want you to talk more." Its bad enough that I'm frustrated with the dating scene and not able to meet mr. right without her making me feel bad and having to point it out to people too! My other friends are supportive and tell me that I should enjoy my life, not worry and that I should have fun for now. But for some reason she keeps telling me the same crap over and over again, I'm like give it a rest!!!
littleplanet Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Yep, that's exactly what she's trying to do. Matchmaker. The old convention that you are somehow incomplete without that certain status. Meanwhile your friends respect you and the fact that of course you'll take your own sweet time, have some fun, enjoy life, and when it happens - it happens. Tune her out as best you can. It should never be 'social pressure' that forces your hand. (mr right will be right to you.......not to her, or anyone else.)
Tayla Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I saw this post as a wake up call. If this type of comment upsets you, you may well not be ready for a relationship with mr right or mr wrong. Its important to handle things somewhat diplomatically even when an off the cuff remark is made. I would be polite when she says it and go, Aww thanks for having my back, I'm fine with my personal life choice. And then sing Loudly- I am women hear me roar...( btw its good if you sing it off key to just annoy her!) If she continues tell her you are going to consider paying for her nose jobs, as she is getting too nosey for her own good
LuckyLady13 Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 "I have a friend from work" Lipitor, your definition of friend is quite off! This is not a friend from work. This is someone with very low self-esteem creating a problem where there isn't one in a very lame attempt to make you feel bad about yourself just to appear better than you in some way. "Its bad enough that I'm frustrated with the dating scene and not able to meet mr. right without her making me feel bad" Friends don't do this so I hope from this point forward you realize she is not your friend? So far, right now she has you feeling exactly how she wanted you to feel. At best she's a frienemy but really she is just a co-worker crossing lines into your personal life, attempting to create self-esteem for herself and using you to do it. Being single can be great. The world is your oyster, you have options out the whazoo, time to make careful decisions going forward regarding your future and somehow, you've let this co-worker into your head so much that you can't see reality anymore. Stop her. Immediately! She is using you. 1
Sugarkane Posted June 20, 2014 Posted June 20, 2014 This isn't what a real friend would do. My co workers at my old Job always said this to me. It pissed me off. If they're persistent as my old co workers were, you're going to have to be blunt.
SpiralOut Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I would just tell her that my love life is private and I don't want to discuss it at work. You like to keep things professional. Then avoid her. She's not your friend.
Author Lipitor11 Posted June 21, 2014 Author Posted June 21, 2014 I've been avoiding her for awhile and so far I feel great about it! Yeah, people like her aren't friends, they are only there to poke fun at certain people just for the heck of it. I've been giving her the cold shoulder and its funny that she doesn't bother to greet me anymore.
Theory816 Posted July 7, 2014 Posted July 7, 2014 (edited) She sounds like a real ass ho. It's pretty obvious that you are single and ready to mingle and she doesn't need to point that out so blatantly and also to everyone else. Totally disregarding your feelings. Though I wouldn't totally disregard her completely. Just make her your acquaintance and not a real friend. Edited July 7, 2014 by Theory816
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