MARRIAGE MINDED Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 I met my girlfriend one year ago . She was great . I did not think about a future and I took things slow . We really developed feelings for each other . It was like a fairy tale . We decided that we would eventually get married and even have kids in the far future . we spent 5 out of 7 days together . it was great . she said she fely like being married sometimes . She even started cooking and we had a couple of dinner parties with friends . then one day she calls and says she has some problems with school and she needs time to focus on that . She then decides to go to a school far away , but she would return in time for the holidays . She needed time to deal with whatever it was on her mind . She never told me . Well I was emailing an d calling about when she was coming " BACK TO SEE ME " . She emails back that she wants to break up . She feels that it is best because we are not right for each other . We got along great . She tells me this ? I tried reasoning , but I got no where . i did nc for one month . then i emailed her because i saw an article in the paper that her sister's soccer team won the championship and I congratulated her . So she sends me her photo and says that she is having problems in school . She apologized for not writing to me . she said she was very bust with school . i do think that it was odd that she sent her photo . what did that mean ? Then asks if i could help her . so by phone and email i helped her get through this tough course . she was exiremely grateful and says talk later . never called . i wrote a few times no response from her . i waited till before valentinms and wrote a romantic letter to her . she wrote back thanking me and saying it was beautiful and it was a nice gearure because she has been unhappy . bur that was it . she said nothing else . i am confused about all of this . i love her . how and what can i do to get through to her . can anyone explain why she is acting like this ? help ! thanks all and sorry for the length . MARRIAGE MINDED
tiki Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 Leave her alone. She may not be into you. If she is, she'll come around. Don't push it any further. Good luck.
davedawgaz Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 Me and My Ex (gosh, it hurts so much to say that) broke up a few weeks ago. She needed space and her Dad was mad at both of us. The harder I tried to convince her, the more it would push her away. So, whatever you do, give her the space that she neededs and she will come around. You need to give her space and I know it is much easier said than done. She is not going to forget about you, trust me. She still means what she said, just let her realize it for herself.
marriage minded Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 I need to explain that my relationship was one year in length . I did not explain that earlier. YES , SHE WAS STUNNING IN BEAUTY AND IN EVERYTHING . I WOULD SAY A 10 . I felt and was convinced she was the " one " . I am not a pushover type . In fact , I never even thought I would fall in love . My problem is that I deep down wanted it all . I wanted the future , commitment and happiness we both spoke about . I thank you for your insights . I realize that if she returns IT MUST BE HER ON HER OWN . i WILL NOT BEG OR PLEAD WITH HER . You guys have given me a wake up call . I understand that sometimes when you really love someone it is hard to let go . But I will start looking at new prospects and hopefully date alot and try to move on . Thanks ir has been great reading all youir responses . Wow , it is so good to know that others have gone through this and can give positive outlooks . But I still wonder should I do no contact or call her at times and try to see if she will come back ? What do you guys think is the best way ?GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU . IT WILL BE TOUGH FOR ME . DEEP DOWN I STILL WISH SHE WOULD COME BACK .
davedawgaz Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 Look. That is a good atitude but give yourself time to heal. Focus on other things. There is a lot more to life than just this. And I know it doen't seem that way sometimes. Just give her space, with space it will allow hwe to miss you. All the things she said, she probably meant them. I'm sure she will call soon. Just give her space.
REALITYMAN Posted February 20, 2005 Posted February 20, 2005 i CAN NOT UNDERSTAND HOW SHE CAN KEEP SILENT AND NOT CALL OR EMAIL ME . I am wondering , doesn'rt she think about me ? Doesn't she have feelings for me ? What happened she flipped a switch and boom instant indifference ?:. any answers ? r.m.
davedawgaz Posted February 20, 2005 Posted February 20, 2005 Look. She is thinking of you too. Trust me. She is just trying to be strong. If that is not the case, then she is preoccupied with other stuff. It may be anoother guy but it may not be. Just give it time, she will realize how much she misses you if you guys are meant to be. Sometimes it takes months for things to come around. In the meantime, stay busy, do what you have fun doing. Go out with the boys or meet some new girls. If she realizes how much you are hurt it just gives her the upper hand.
westernxer Posted February 21, 2005 Posted February 21, 2005 Stay away from her... easier said than done, of course. She obviously put you on the back burner for whatever reason, and she's too much of a coward to say why, other than she needs time to clear her head. Either you wait her out and let her disrespect you for the rest of your life or you bury her for good. So what if she's a 10... she's not the only 10 out there. Go out and have fun being a guy for once. I'll guarantee that she'll regret what she did, especially when she realizes you don't want her back. Right now she thinks you're in the palm of her hand. You've got to break her heart... it's the only way. This happened to me a while back... girl told me one night that she needed to date other people, even after we had made a commitment to each other. When I told her it was over right then and there, she changed her story and said she wasn't sure... that she needed more time. Too late, babe (still took me a little time to recover, but you get the message). It's been a year now without a word between us, and I heard through the grapevine that she's still waiting for a relapse on my part. Ridiculous, if you ask me. Her true colors surfaced that fateful night, and that's where our story ended. I don't buy that need-time-to-think excuse. It's exactly what it is, an excuse. She'd go out of her way to be with you if she really loved you, that's the bottom line. She's not being honest with you because she's wants to keep you around for a rainy day and/or a last resort.
Recommended Posts