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Posted

Me and my ex I feel are done and never getting back together . I'm on 3 different dating websites and having no luck with any of them . I don't know what to do . I'm feel so lonely . I just can't seem to find anyone interested in me . I add random cute girls on Facebook but never muster up the courage to talk to them because I don't know what to say . I don't know what I'm doing wrong .

Posted

Being born male was what I did wrong. :mad:

  • Like 1
Posted
I add random cute girls on Facebook but never muster up the courage to talk to them because I don't know what to say . I don't know what I'm doing wrong .

 

Emphasis mine. That's your problem. You don't talk to girls. This is probably affecting your online dating communication as well. How about you get off OLD and Facebook, meet some girls in real life, and just talk to them?

Posted

adding random people on FB is not the answer.

 

You may not be ready to date & you may still be hung up on your EX.

 

People attract what they project -- if you are happy & upbeat you will be able to find a healthy relationship. If you are miserable or needy, you will have a tough time finding somebody

 

What does your OLD profile say? Is it positive? Does it highlight your best qualities or does it come across as angry?

  • Like 2
Posted

There is a rough area after a breakup. You want to date -- and the books all tell you "go out and meet new people" -- but you're still thinking about your ex, at worst, or still somewhat emotionally raw, at best.

 

Took me six months before I really felt like I was ready to try to connect with a woman, as opposed to just trying to hook up with her. Even so, I still compare them to my ex. It's rough, man, but it's a process that can't really be sped up. Just keep trying. Meet people, even people that are not remotely dating material. Just get used to interacting with people. Polish your social skills. Then when you're ready, you'll be prepared.

Posted

So many questions?

 

First off - how old are you?

 

Second - read Disillusioned's post carefully....meet people in real life. I was a sheltered, nerdy, introverted and shamed boy/teenager. The effects still linger in me to this day, but I'm learning how to really be an adult. Lots of trial and error and major failures, but that's life.

 

 

Third - Yes after a breakup things are rough. Now is the time to surround yourself with friends/family/hobbies. If you are worried about being a burden on those closet to you don't. What's the old saying - those that matter don't mind and those that mind.... I had a fiancee break up with me 4 days before our wedding. Let's just say having tried to always hold it in I felt so bad when I let it go after that - but that's what friends/family are for.

Posted
adding random people on FB is not the answer.

 

You may not be ready to date & you may still be hung up on your EX.

 

People attract what they project -- if you are happy & upbeat you will be able to find a healthy relationship. If you are miserable or needy, you will have a tough time finding somebody

What does your OLD profile say? Is it positive? Does it highlight your best qualities or does it come across as angry?

 

SO true!!!

  • Author
Posted
So many questions?

 

First off - how old are you?

 

Second - read Disillusioned's post carefully....meet people in real life. I was a sheltered, nerdy, introverted and shamed boy/teenager. The effects still linger in me to this day, but I'm learning how to really be an adult. Lots of trial and error and major failures, but that's life.

 

 

Third - Yes after a breakup things are rough. Now is the time to surround yourself with friends/family/hobbies. If you are worried about being a burden on those closet to you don't. What's the old saying - those that matter don't mind and those that mind.... I had a fiancee break up with me 4 days before our wedding. Let's just say having tried to always hold it in I felt so bad when I let it go after that - but that's what friends/family are for.

 

I'm 24. I don't know where to meet people since I'm trying to quit drinking so I don't go to bars. I'm just looking to move on but can't find anyone to move on to.

Posted
I'm 24. I don't know where to meet people since I'm trying to quit drinking so I don't go to bars. I'm just looking to move on but can't find anyone to move on to.

 

There are tons of ways to meet new people without going to bars.

 

Take or teach a class

Join a co-ed sports team

Tell friends & family you are open to being fixed up

Volunteer to do something you are passionate about:

politics,

rescue animals,

raise money to find a cure for disease,

something with the arts

big brothers / big sisters

pick up a hammer for Habitat for Humanity

go speed dating

attend a singles event that's not a bar; they have them for all sorts of interests, look around

If you put some effort into it & ge creative you will find somebody you click with

  • Author
Posted
There are tons of ways to meet new people without going to bars.

 

Take or teach a class

Join a co-ed sports team

Tell friends & family you are open to being fixed up

Volunteer to do something you are passionate about:

politics,

rescue animals,

raise money to find a cure for disease,

something with the arts

big brothers / big sisters

pick up a hammer for Habitat for Humanity

go speed dating

attend a singles event that's not a bar; they have them for all sorts of interests, look around

If you put some effort into it & ge creative you will find somebody you click with

I don't have the time between work and seeing my daughter to do most of that stuff. And there's no speed dating in my town. I go to the gym but wouldn't know what to say to anyone

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