Mengineer Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 I started taking summer classes at college a few weeks ago. There's this girl who sits next to me. She seems to keep to herself, playing with her phone before class and during breaks. Naturally, I try to break the ice and say hi to her and make small conversations during those times. The last class we had, I made a comment about her eating pears because she always eats pears every time I see her. She laughed, smiled, and offered me a piece. I accepted and then we just exchanged conversation about each other. Things like what our majors were, and similar talk, nothing too personal. She seemed interested, with each question I asked she responded and asked me the same questions in return. Should I play it cool and take it slow to see where it leads? Or should I ask her out sometime soon?
RachR Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 Take it slow how? By keeping it in the classroom? Talking about pears? What? I say ask her out, but do it outside the classroom. If she's not interested like that, then it's awkward. And if she declines, you could comment that's ok and hope you two can remain friendly as you do like her. And just say have a good day and enjoy your pear, and be on your merry way.
Author Mengineer Posted June 16, 2014 Author Posted June 16, 2014 Take it slow how? By keeping it in the classroom? Talking about pears? What? As in get to know her better, and ask her out at a later time. In a month maybe.
deathandtaxes Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 As in get to know her better, and ask her out at a later time. In a month maybe. No. Strike while the iron is hot! Ask now! Not later. A fun short coffee date. Walk in the park. Something to show you're interested.
jbelle6 Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 No OP. Ask her now. When guys do what you're doing I tend to think you are just being friendly. 1
running4life Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 Why make things difficult, you'll never know until you ask...a study meeting, walk around the campus, out to lunch...simple and makes for conversation 1
Kaiten Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 Damn Mengineer, really ask yourself what's the point in waiting?? A lot of times we think that the quality of the decision is directly proportionate to the time spent making that decision. This is one of the biggest traps I see in dating and life. Go for it already.
Author Mengineer Posted June 16, 2014 Author Posted June 16, 2014 (edited) I guess I better make a move. I was thinking maybe it was too quick being it's only been two weeks. Thanks for the replies, my first class of the week is tomorrow. I'll ask her out after class. Edited June 16, 2014 by Mengineer
d0nnivain Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 Some people ask for a date within 2 hours. I don't think 2 weeks is too soon. You don't have to start with a big expensive date like dinner in the nicest place in town. A study session -- just the two of you -- before the next test might be a good ice breaker. It will get you out of the classroom without too much pressure. Getting a coffee after class could also be another low key begining before you work up to stuff that looks more like a date such as a Friday night movie.
Author Mengineer Posted June 16, 2014 Author Posted June 16, 2014 Some people ask for a date within 2 hours. I don't think 2 weeks is too soon. You don't have to start with a big expensive date like dinner in the nicest place in town. A study session -- just the two of you -- before the next test might be a good ice breaker. It will get you out of the classroom without too much pressure. Getting a coffee after class could also be another low key begining before you work up to stuff that looks more like a date such as a Friday night movie. In my experience if a girl around campus agrees to date you in 2 hours, she's either promiscuous or wants to take advantage of you. Usually I notice it's both. Good Idea, I was thinking the same thing. there is a test next week. Also she's a visiting student from a nearby college so I could ask her to check out campus stuff with me.
d0nnivain Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 In my experience if a girl around campus agrees to date you in 2 hours, she's either promiscuous or wants to take advantage of you. Usually I notice it's both. . We may be having a vocabulary difference. To me "date" in the context you used it (as a verb) means an exclusive relationship. Yes, I agree with you that somebody who agrees to that very quickly might not be genuine. I said some people ask for "a date" (a noun) means a single preset meeting with a romantic overtone. What I was talking about is within 2 hours of meeting, one person says would you like to go to the movies with me on Friday? I don't have a problem with that Q being asked sooner rather than later but in college the quicker that came the more it may have freaked me out. I think your pace is fine. Good luck on the upcoming test.
Author Mengineer Posted June 16, 2014 Author Posted June 16, 2014 We may be having a vocabulary difference. To me "date" in the context you used it (as a verb) means an exclusive relationship. Yes, I agree with you that somebody who agrees to that very quickly might not be genuine. I said some people ask for "a date" (a noun) means a single preset meeting with a romantic overtone. What I was talking about is within 2 hours of meeting, one person says would you like to go to the movies with me on Friday? I don't have a problem with that Q being asked sooner rather than later but in college the quicker that came the more it may have freaked me out. I think your pace is fine. Good luck on the upcoming test. I see, so basically you meant I should just have a, "social" gathering with her first and let that build up to an actual, "date" at sometime in the near future. Such as a month or so from now. That was my original intention. That is actually what I meant by, "play it cool and take it slow" in my original post. Glad we got that cleared up.
Potion9 Posted June 17, 2014 Posted June 17, 2014 Have more conversations in/before/after class. Then go "hang out" outside the classroom. See how that goes and take it from there.
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