heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 After an amazing 1st date....and her messaging saying I can't wait to see you again soon/had an awesome time. Then you ask for a date a day later... and she doesn't even respond. What do you think/what do you do?
hasaquestion Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 After an amazing 1st date....and her messaging saying I can't wait to see you again soon/had an awesome time. Then you ask for a date a day later... and she doesn't even respond. What do you think/what do you do? What do you think? Not to be a dick, but lets use some common sense here. You sent her a message. Unless she is in prison or dead, she got your message. If she wants to respond to your message, she will respond to your message. If she doesn't, she won't. And if she's in prison or dead, then your dinner idea for Saturday night seems pretty insignificant in the grand scheme of things. In the meantime worry about something worth worrying about. 4
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 She is waiting to hear from the other more interesting dude before making plans with you. 5
juicygirl Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 Maybe she's busy! As for you,do nothing because if you keep texting or trying to call her she'll think yourself a weirdo. Just relax, the second date may have been pants anyway.
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 Will add that she is my ex and we just went out for first time this past week... last message from her was I want to see you again really soon. Is she playing hard to get/slow pace? It did take me like 15 hours to respond to her previous message.
aprilisi Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 Maybe she's dating like a man. Can't count the times this has happened to me....
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 Maybe she's dating like a man. Can't count the times this has happened to me.... What does that mean dating LIKE a man?
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 Will add that she is my ex and we just went out for first time this past week... last message from her was I want to see you again really soon. Is she playing hard to get/slow pace? It did take me like 15 hours to respond to her previous message. Aaawwww yes she is, why would she hurry, she knows she got you back if she wishes.
aprilisi Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 Men tend to take their time and ease into dating, and also they tend to not over analyze everything. They play it cool and its hard to know what they're thinking. Do they see you as booty call material? A FWB? Or more? They also play the field, dating several women at a time before settling down. More women are doing this. My friend went to a workshop called "how to date like a man" once and told me some stuff she learned. She was 35 and had been single for years. She took the advice, dating several men, playing it cool....just living her llife. Focusing on herself. Now she's married. That's what I'm doing too. 1
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 Aaawwww yes she is, why would she hurry, she knows she got you back if she wishes. So does that mean she is not interested?
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 Men tend to take their time and ease into dating, and also they tend to not over analyze everything. They play it cool and its hard to know what they're thinking. Do they see you as booty call material? A FWB? Or more? They also play the field, dating several women at a time before settling down. More women are doing this. My friend went to a workshop called "how to date like a man" once and told me some stuff she learned. She was 35 and had been single for years. She took the advice, dating several men, playing it cool....just living her llife. Focusing on herself. Now she's married. That's what I'm doing too. Don't THINK this is the case as she got out of her rebound relationship from ours a couple months ago and hasn't been on a single date yet.
Potz4prez Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 So does that mean she is not interested? That, or she's using you to stroke her ego. OR she has something better, and she wants to keep you around just in case. Either way, you deserve better. 1
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 So does that mean she is not interested? She is interested but under HER terms. Who broke up and why? 1
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 She is interested but under HER terms. Who broke up and why? She did a year a go.... we were too dependent on each other and too clingy. Felt we both needed time a part. At dinner this week we talked a lot (she drove this convo) about how sometimes people need time apart to figure things out and there were long eye stares or she would take and hold my hand etc... She was worried I would want someone else and not want to be with her forever and needed time to date around... I became a little needy at the end.
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 She did a year a go.... we were too dependent on each other and too clingy. Felt we both needed time a part. At dinner this week we talked a lot (she drove this convo) about how sometimes people need time apart to figure things out and there were long eye stares or she would take and hold my hand etc... She was worried I would want someone else and not want to be with her forever and needed time to date around... I became a little needy at the end. So now is time to show her you can do `not needy`. Get busy doing something else and let her answer you on her own time. She may well be waiting on purpose to see if you will start texting and calling repeatedly. Remember you are not in a relationship together. She may just answer back in a week. 2
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 So now is time to show her you can do `not needy`. Get busy doing something else and let her answer you on her own time. She may well be waiting on purpose to see if you will start texting and calling repeatedly. Remember you are not in a relationship together. She may just answer back in a week. I agree she may be testing me.... when we had dinner she asked me go to an event this week to accompany her. She didn't bring it up on her own for no reason. She just had to check and confirm the day. Do I ask about it or if she wants me to go still she will ask?
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 I agree she may be testing me.... when we had dinner she asked me go to an event this week to accompany her. She didn't bring it up on her own for no reason. She just had to check and confirm the day. Do I ask about it or if she wants me to go still she will ask? No, you let her get back to you with the details. If she wants to go with you she will.
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 No, you let her get back to you with the details. If she wants to go with you she will. But when we met (the first time) a few years ago I was highly clingy and pushy/persistent which is how I got her in the first place. Not I have to do the opposite?
Gaeta Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 Didn't you guys break up because you were becoming cligny? 1
todreaminblue Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 But when we met (the first time) a few years ago I was highly clingy and pushy/persistent which is how I got her in the first place. Not I have to do the opposite? tell me about her communication style when you were together before.....deb
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 tell me about her communication style when you were together before.....deb What do you mean? What exactly is communication style?
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 Didn't you guys break up because you were becoming cligny? Towards the end we were just everything to each other and it became too much. Both of our happiness depended on the other.
HeartinPain Posted June 15, 2014 Posted June 15, 2014 She did a year a go.... we were too dependent on each other and too clingy. Felt we both needed time a part. At dinner this week we talked a lot (she drove this convo) about how sometimes people need time apart to figure things out and there were long eye stares or she would take and hold my hand etc... She was worried I would want someone else and not want to be with her forever and needed time to date around... I became a little needy at the end. Did you date others during this time apart ? She may be having second thoughts about the relationship with you. The date does indeed seem like it really stroked her ego. If she was really interested in rekindling a relationship with you, she would have replied.
Author heart12 Posted June 15, 2014 Author Posted June 15, 2014 Did you date others during this time apart ? She may be having second thoughts about the relationship with you. The date does indeed seem like it really stroked her ego. If she was really interested in rekindling a relationship with you, she would have replied. Yes she was in a rebound for most of it and I had a few brief relationships (1 notable one) where she feels I had the experiences I needed to be ready for a healthier relationship and as confident as I've become. When you say she may be having 2nd thoughts, do you mean she may be thinking of trying again? All throughout dinner she kept bringing up that sometimes people need a break or time a part to get ready or back where they need to be. She said something like 'we didn't work out the "1st" time' implying a 2nd.
Recommended Posts