Should I give up on dating?

[Midwest guy]

Originally posted by MassiveAtom

Explain your behavior, tell him about Lindsay,

 

Use these words at least once, " I feel I might become a danger to myself or someone else, and I don't want to feel that."

 

Talk to him about helping you find the reasons behind your Obsessiveness, and clinginess. Tell him that you have been told by women that you creep them out. Tell him how you feel about that.

 

Let him know that you've visited LoveShack.org.

 

Have him visit here and read this thread.

 

You're a good guy MWG, Just get some help with this soon. Okay?

 

On your side,

 

MA

 

Im not no Danger! Girls say the words creeped out all the time. IM talking more advice on how to deal with her and maybe talk to her without sounding as desperate.

[DinNJ]

With all do respect Midwest.... it's too late for that. Your actions already imbedded 'desperate' in her mind. Walk away from this one... woman are like shadows.... if you chase em', you'll never catch em'...

[clynn]

That's why I say you should stop dating.

 

Take a break.

 

Try not to be too stressed out about stuff.

 

You can't catch this one. It is too late now. Not a chance.

[MassiveAtom]

You asked what to tell your therapist.

 

This'll get his attention.

 

He'll know you're serious.

 

I have never heard the words "creeped out" to describe my advances toward a girl.

 

THAT my friend is not okay. Really do check in with your counsellor about this.

 

It's important. I hope I didn't offend you.

[Hund1976]

You should print out the transcripts of all these posts for the past couple weeks and let him have a look at them. You're paying this guy so get your moneys worth out of it!

[DinNJ]

apparently he's not doing his job... so send your check this way...

 

truth is bro... there is a lesson to be learned here... in fact there is a lesson to be learned everyday in life. Learn from this one..... don't question it.

[Midwest guy]

Originally posted by DinNJ

With all do respect Midwest.... it's too late for that. Your actions already imbedded 'desperate' in her mind. Walk away from this one... woman are like shadows.... if you chase em', you'll never catch em'...

 

Not even a one last chance deaL? Like the NHL labor strike and one last attempt they made to get a deal last night. I'm sure one last attempt can be made to save this relationship.

[DinNJ]

Ya know what???? You're just messin' around with our heads right??? Please tell me you are... cause you're startin' to creep me out a bit.

[Sckott]

She said "Creeped out".

 

That'ssss really hard to patch up. Unless I was doing a vocal impression of Hannibal Lecter and she was trying to flatter me.

 

It's very over. What's more, you're not in healthy mind to put things together. If you stay in this state of mind, it's very harmful to yourself. You're in no state to do anything but to work on yourself with your therapist.

[clynn]

well it didn't work for the NHL.

 

Watch out, if you continue to call her or contact her...

She will get a RESTRAINING ORDER against you.

[Midwest guy]

Originally posted by clynn

well it didn't work for the NHL.

 

Watch out, if you continue to call her or contact her...

She will get a RESTRAINING ORDER against you.

 

She didnt say I cant call her she just said dont call as often. besides she called me, and called me back again to talk. I can see once a month is ok.

[Hund1976]

I'm sure one last attempt can be made to save this relationship.

What relationship are you talking about? How many dates have you had with this girl? Asking a girl out and getting turned down doesn't constitute a relationship. You need to accept the fact that she's not interested in you.

[Barby]

Geez MG I'm seriously wondering what on earth would make you continue to pursue someone who clearly states that you "creep her out" honestly that sounds like a HUGE red flag of either....

 

 

1) you're not right in the head.

 

2) can't comprehend subtle hints that she is NOT interested in you in anyway.

 

3) you are really an obessive stalker type of person who (in a twisted way) thinks if you pursue her enough, give into whatever she wants, ect, ect, ect that she'll come around and agree to give you a chance.

 

 

 

No matter what the circumstances...you have to know that this isn't healty at all. "Lindsay" doesn't deserve to have someone stalk/obsess over her especially since she TOLD you she wasn't interested and that you're creeping her out.

 

YOU don't deserve to have to pine away over someone who CLEARLY isn't interested.

 

She told you she "doesn't date" she probably said this so that you would STOP pursuing her. I cringe at the thought of her having to look over her shoulder to make sure you're not around, having to check her caller ID and shuddering when your number appears, ect.

 

Do yourself and HER a favor and move on and find someone with a mutual interest!

[Midwest guy]

Originally posted by Barby

Geez MG I'm seriously wondering what on earth would make you continue to pursue someone who clearly states that you "creep her out" honestly that sounds like a HUGE red flag of either....

 

 

1) you're not right in the head.

 

2) can't comprehend subtle hints that she is NOT interested in you in anyway.

 

3) you are really an obessive stalker type of person who (in a twisted way) thinks if you pursue her enough, give into whatever she wants, ect, ect, ect that she'll come around and agree to give you a chance.

 

 

 

No matter what the circumstances...you have to know that this isn't healty at all. "Lindsay" doesn't deserve to have someone stalk/obsess over her especially since she TOLD you she wasn't interested and that you're creeping her out.

 

YOU don't deserve to have to pine away over someone who CLEARLY isn't interested.

 

She told you she "doesn't date" she probably said this so that you would STOP pursuing her. I cringe at the thought of her having to look over her shoulder to make sure you're not around, having to check her caller ID and shuddering when your number appears, ect.

 

Do yourself and HER a favor and move on and find someone with a mutual interest!

 

But SHE agreed to go out with me. She should have said no when I first asked her out instead of waiting over a month.

[Midwest guy]

Originally posted by Hund1976

What relationship are you talking about? How many dates have you had with this girl? Asking a girl out and getting turned down doesn't constitute a relationship. You need to accept the fact that she's not interested in you.

 

She said she likes me as a friend. Could it be she would have went out to dinner withme, but wasnt really interested in anytning romantic? I mean There still has to be a slight chance.

[Barby]

Maybe she's a polite person (even though it isn't polite to lie) and felt bad about turning you down.

 

 

Point is, she won't go out with you so there for you should move on and let it go!

[Sckott]

When someone agrees to go out with you, it doesn't give you rights to OWN THEM forever.

 

Heck doode, marrage doesn't mean forever either. And you don't have to creep someone out for them to walk out on you.

[MassiveAtom]

Originally posted by Sckott

When someone agrees to go out with you, it doesn't give you rights to OWN THEM forever.

 

Heck doode, marrage doesn't mean forever either. And you don't have to creep someone out for them to walk out on you.

 

A M E N !!!!

 

MWG, therapy is tomorrow, PLEASE GO! get some perspective on this. You're creeping ME out now.

 

LET IT GO!

[Barby]

You're creeping ME out now.

 

LET IT GO!

 

Took the words outta my mouth...exactly..honestly not to sound harsh (and I'm sure to the one who's receiving this advice it does sound mean) but there is no reason why you should hang on to this. It's worse than false hope, sounds like she gave you false hope with no intentions of ever dating you....and though that is difficult to to swallow....it seems to be the truth! Moving on will probably be hard but I'd think hanging on would be worse and harder!

[Midwest guy]

Originally posted by Barby

Took the words outta my mouth...exactly..honestly not to sound harsh (and I'm sure to the one who's receiving this advice it does sound mean) but there is no reason why you should hang on to this. It's worse than false hope, sounds like she gave you false hope with no intentions of ever dating you....and though that is difficult to to swallow....it seems to be the truth! Moving on will probably be hard but I'd think hanging on would be worse and harder!

 

Should I call her up and tell her that then? Should I tell her it was rude for her to lie, and call her names? I mean I spent 20 bucks on a card and giftcard for xmas for her and she hugged me. I want it back then. That witch!!

[Barby]

Originally posted by Midwest guy

 

 

Should I call her up and tell her that then? Should I tell her it was rude for her to lie, and call her names? I mean I spent 20 bucks on a card and giftcard for xmas for her and she hugged me. I want it back then. That witch!!

 

 

OMG Are you serious???

 

 

No YOU SHOULD NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT call her or have any further contact with her at all! Chalk it up as a lesson learned! She owes you NOTHING! She did NOT tell you to spend money on her! You seriously are mentally ill and need help!

[JoL]

Midwest guy, i think i speak for the majority of the loveshack forum (correct me if im wrong fellow lovershackers..) But this topic has been dealt with in numerous threads, most of which were closed down because you simply didnt like the advice you were given..and it is getting old. Really old.

 

You need to stop posting about this girl.

She doesn't want to date you.

She doesn't want to talk to you.

Im sorry if that hurts you but it is the truth.

 

I dont' know whate else anyone can say to you. We have all tried to give you advice- you don't want to take it.

Personally, i am no longer going to reply to your posts if they are about this situation.

There is no point giving advice to someone who doesn't want to take it. It's like talking to a brick wall.

[Podna]

Originally posted by Midwest guy

 

 

She didnt say I cant call her she just said dont call as often. besides she called me, and called me back again to talk. I can see once a month is ok.

 

MWG I really think you are just a troll who likes to push an issue to run a thread as long as you can. But just this once I am going to try and help you in hopes that it might show you something that you may not know.

 

OK MWG… let me tell you a little story about a girl I knew.

 

I met this girl who was quite a bit younger than I was (21 vs. my 29) and she showed some interest in me. She was really nice to me and would touch me on the arm and shoulder from time to time, always gave good eye contact and smiled. Despite the age deference I decided to ask her out. I ran into her one day and said, “Hey, are you hungry?” to which she replied, “Yes. I am!” Unlike you she went out with me. We had a good date. She was smart beyond her years, and very articulate. I was very attracted to her and she was very beautiful. After our first date she gave me her number (unlike you) and asked me to call her for another date. I have a 3 day rule where I wait 3 days before I call (to not seem too desperate). After the 3 days I called her and got no answer so I left a message. The next day came and she never called me back so I thought… Well maybe she forgot. So I called her again, once again, no answer, and I left no message this time. After the 2 calls and no responses I wrote her off. Then she called me back after several more days. I asked her about the lack of a return phone call, and she said she was really busy and just didn’t have time. She said we should get together that weekend for another date. Well the weekend came and I called her. She didn’t answer again. I called Friday night and left a message to call me back. I called again about midday on Saturday but didn’t leave a message. She didn’t call me back until Tuesday and I didn’t answer and she left no message. I got the idea.

 

Moral of the story… Some women just like the attention of being pursued. They may not really want to be with you, but they like the attention.

 

This girl seems to have done that very thing to you! The problem is that she doesn’t seem to want the attention anymore. She wants you to lay off or at least step back.

 

Dude you are being played. She loves the idea of your burning need for her, but she has no intention of being with you, that much is clear. Have some pride and dignity and just let it go. You don’t want to be her patsy. Get a life and find someone else. If anything it will make her want you more when you stop taking her phone calls and then tell her you found someone.

 

 

Originally posted by Midwest guy

 

 

But SHE agreed to go out with me. She should have said no when I first asked her out instead of waiting over a month.

 

 

Dude if she wanted to go out with you she would have. Men and women are very deferent in many ways, but this is not one of them. If she really wanted to go out with you she would have made time to do so. She didn’t! Enough said!

[moimeme]

I can be OCD sometimes. I have ADD which OCD is part of it. Alot of people these days have ADD.

 

You sound very much like my last ex, who had ADD and OCD. Once he decided he wanted something (whether or not it would bother me, or whether or not we could afford it), he HAD to have it. Nothing and nobody would stop him, including the fact that it bothered other people or hurt them or whatever.

 

You are not getting it and that's because people with ADD often don't get it. You don't see it from her point of view. All you know is you want what you want and you don't understand why you don't get what you want.

 

The reason is that other people get to have a say in what THEY want, too. It's not just your world and you don't always get what you want in this life. You are going to have nothing but trouble until you and your shrink work hard on getting you to understand this.

 

She said she wants you ony as a friend and that's it. Now you have to back off and leave it alone. Absolutely print out all these posts and take them to your doc because he needs to know that you are doing this.

[Lindsay]

Please, for the love of God, give up.