Should I Persist?

[kbrew]

So my recent girlfriend tried to break up with me a week ago (you could say she actually did). For reasons communication seems to have broken down in the relationship. When all seemed done, I said to her lets have some space a break, but do me a favor, give me one date later on so I could show her how much we click. She replied positively, she said yes, kisses started appearing on texts again.

 

So ive deployed the NC rule since. Ive had no contact since that conversation.

 

Its been hard, but to be honest, its been good for me. Ive realised ive lost touch with myself. Ive been hitting the gym hard like I used too. I feel like ive got nothing to lose and I can say what I want again. The reason this stopped I think was because I got sacked mid relationship and my confidence took a knock.

 

Well im at the point now where im waking up in the morning and I dont feel sad. I know im getting to the point where the love will disappear. The way I seem to work is, when the love is gone. Its gone for good. It aint coming back. I cant let someone who hurt me back in again.

 

So today, I decided to text her. Just to talk, perhaps im seeking some sort of closure. But I expected to be ignored.

 

"hey hows you"

 

10 minautes later I get a reply

 

"im good thanks, how are you XXX"

 

I reply back. 4 hours later..

 

Nothing..

 

 

Granted the reason our relationship broke down because we stopped communicating. Granted that she seems to reciprocate kisses and replied quickly. And also taking in mind that im getting to a point of no return. Im wondering if trying to communicate in a jokey way, have a laugh, not obsessively, but persistently, and NOT talking about the relationship or feelings, might make her start talking?

 

I just dont know, part of me feels her dropping kisses on the text is kinda cruel if she's had enough.. I know 4 hours is abit short but, what im asking here, is should I persist and keep trying to show her my fun side..

 

You might say Ive already ****ed it by breaking the NC.. But I dont care, im ready to move on now.. I need closure..

Edited June 15, 2014 by kbrew

[Pobble]

I think as you feel you have started to move on, it would be wise not to rekindle the relationship.

 

Girls often do put xxx on the end of messages - I still do it out of habit to exes, all the time to friends and family and even to work people.

 

Sometimes no reply is the closure. This is the toughest part - I'm suffering at the moment with that too, and my heart goes out to you.

[d0nnivain]

NC is not about winning the other person back.

 

This break you took showed you something you didn't previously know: You don't like her as much as you thought you did when she was breaking up with you. She isn't chomping at the bit to get back with you either.

 

Now that you have been apart you aren't missing her, let the relationship continue to be over. Go forward in life, not backwards.

[kbrew]

Well she messaged back.

 

She told me not to worry and that she missed our chats then talked about a bunch of stuff.

 

Thats got to be positive?

 

I know everyone here says I should bin this relationship becuase I feel ready to move on. But thats only because Ive done everything in my power to kill all feelings for her. In reality shes my type in every way. Just seems stupid to me to allow things to fall apart over what could be simple misscommunication..

[Elle1975]

Well she messaged back.

 

She told me not to worry and that she missed our chats then talked about a bunch of stuff.

 

Thats got to be positive?

 

I know everyone here says I should bin this relationship becuase I feel ready to move on. But thats only because Ive done everything in my power to kill all feelings for her. In reality shes my type in every way. Just seems stupid to me to allow things to fall apart over what could be simple misscommunication..

 

You're not ready to move on. You're texting her, trying to get her back, to get her to talk to you, etc..

 

When you are over her, you won't even think about showing her your "fun side"

 

Go back to your nc and stay nc this time.