mohhoss213 Posted June 13, 2014 Posted June 13, 2014 Just to give some background info, I have been diagnosed with mild ADHD and Asperger's. I've always kept to myself and the thought to try and build connections/relationships with others was an afterthought. I'm hoping to change that with the help of a therapist, finding support groups and meeting new peers. In particular, there is one thought that has been occupying my mind. Not to say as a generalization, but I've read that women require more emotional and intimacy reinforcement than men in their relationships. How would you feel if that reinforcement wasn't there as often as you'd like? How does it impact your life to have that strong relationship/emotional connection not just with your bf/gf but other people dear to you?
Atticus9292012 Posted June 13, 2014 Posted June 13, 2014 I keep trying to answer this question, but I guess I need more clarification on what you mean by emotional and intimacy reinforcement...like specifically what you mean? I can say, hate to generalize, but I have dated a lot of guys that were not exactly great at making me feel loved. Not for lack of trying, or lack of them caring about me. I think we all feel loved or feel appreciated by different things or different behaviors. I definitely believe in the five love languages idea. I know women that love gifts. I really could care less. If you just sit and listen to me over dinner, I feel loved..... Even someone is lacking in that, I guess I try to see if they're trying. The effort is what is the most important.....I hope that is somewhat helpful.
Author mohhoss213 Posted June 14, 2014 Author Posted June 14, 2014 To Atticus, what I mean by emotional and intimacy reinforcement is understanding and relating to people. I myself have trouble understanding and expressing my own feelings. So, it can be uncomfortable to try and connect with people because I'm worried about my lack of emotional intelligence coming to light. How do you negotiate whether the effort is genuine for someone who struggles with processing emotions/social cues?
todreaminblue Posted June 14, 2014 Posted June 14, 2014 emitonal connections can be built as much as any other connection...takes time sometimes...but it is worth building as many connections in a marriage or partnership t stay the course....for hwen you lose one or it gets lost in transit...... you have another as back up ...strategic logic.....deb
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