tanbark813 Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 As a software geek, I sit in front of a computer more hours than human eyeballs are designed to handle. As such, it is not uncommon to interact with people throughout the day via loveshack, or otherwise. I am sure many people on this board can relate. Anyhoo.. Recently I have been talking with a girl online. She seems cool, intelligent, good-natured, and has shapely breasts. We decided to meet in person and she came out to visit this past weekend. We had a great time, and both said we would like to see each other again. Today, however, she seemed somewhat standoffish. Her flight back was delayed and it took her far longer to return home than scheduled, so I felt bad about that, and she didn't get much sleep before returning to work. So that may play into the resulting vibe. But we were able to lay out where each person stands over IM (for the most part). The problem is there are two main issues standing in the way of something developing: 1. The distance - she's 2000 miles away. I've been in LDR's where the other girls lived 2 hours away by car, but never anything this distant. 2. I am friends with Mary Jane. She is not. I would not have a problem giving it up if it came to that, but I know she also doesn't want me to feel resentment towards her if I were to stop smoking. It's only been one weekend, so this may be jumping the gun a bit, but this has been on my mind today. We've both just gotten out of less-than-perfect relationships so it's not like we need to just jump into anything either. I'm also kind of wondering if I'm nuts for even considering trying to make something like this work, but it's not every day that a girl like her comes around. This is where you wise people offer your advice, comments, flames, etc...
tattoomytoe Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 i would screw her when she flies in, but that is about it. so Keep it Status Quo.
johan Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Advice: I think you should try to find someone who lives within, say, 30 miles of you. Comment: It's really hard to get to know someone over long distances, even if you spend a lot of time instant messaging. There must be plenty of women in your area, particularly if you consider the ratio of women to straight men. Flame: Find someone who lives near you for a change, moron! Etc.: Good luck, though. Maybe she's worth it.
tiki Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Idunno, maybe you are jumping the gun? Is she up for a LDR? Are you someone that needs love and affection on a constant basis? Are you willing to lose your bond with MJ?
Hund1976 Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 If shes 2,000 miles away I think you should avoid it. That is a REALLY-REALLY long distance. It would be different if you were dating someone for a couple years and they had to move 2,000 miles away for a year or something. But I don't think I would try to get into a relationship with someone who lives that far away from the beginning. Would you be willing to move to wherever she lives?
hongkongchick Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 i have never been a fan of the LDR, i have been in one, one that hurt quite a bit. we were more than 2000 miles away, but LDR are pretty much the same, unless you are just so in love with her and that you dont think you can possibly find another girl in your own city, county, state, then ok go for it, but LDRs dont always turn out "happily ever after"
savethedrama4allama Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Wait, did you bone her? Was it good? An LDR of that proportion is a lot of time, money, and effort. If you decide to go for it, make sure she is worth it to you- for the sake of both of you.
Pocky Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 How do you know she didn't change her mind after she met you? Maybe you're not her type?
alphamale Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by tanbark813 I'm also kind of wondering if I'm nuts for even considering trying to make something like this work, you are nuts.
Author tanbark813 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by tiki Is she up for a LDR? Are you someone that needs love and affection on a constant basis? Are you willing to lose your bond with MJ? I don't know if she is. It doesn't really sound like it so this may be a moot thread. Yes I am, but I can deal. My last ex I only saw on the weekends. While I would have preferred more time ideally, it was no big deal to handle the seperation during the week (especially since I'm rather busy during the week anyway). I likes me some MJ, but giving it up wouldn't be a big deal. But don't nobody betta come 'tween me n' beer. Originally posted by Hund1976 Would you be willing to move to wherever she lives? Doubtful. I'd prefer the other way around as my current area provides the best opportunities for what I do for a living. We also have better weather out here. Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama Wait, did you bone her? Was it good? Let's just say that in no way was I disappointed. Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama An LDR of that proportion is a lot of time, money, and effort. If you decide to go for it, make sure she is worth it to you- for the sake of both of you. The time, money, and effort aren't the issue. But as I said in response to tiki, it also depends on what she's up for.
alphamale Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama Wait, did you bone her? Was it good? now, now, be nice llama. you should not be asking this question, I should be.
savethedrama4allama Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale now, now, be nice llama. you should not be asking this question, I should be. You're teaching me well, alpha.
savethedrama4allama Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Well tank, you never really know what she's thinking. Maybe she's confused too- you said that you both got out of crappy relationships recently. Maybe she's trying to catch her bearings. Also, I often get told that I come off as short or b*tchy in written communications, so perhaps she didn't intend to be as standoffish as she appeared. I think we're all wondering, what is so damn special about her that you can't just date someone closer to you?
tiki Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Yeah! If you're gonna go all outta yer way and sh*t, take llama out. Just joshin.
Author tanbark813 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by savethedrama4yrmama Well tank, you never really know what she's thinking. Maybe she's confused too- you said that you both got out of crappy relationships recently. Maybe she's trying to catch her bearings. Also, I often get told that I come off as short or b*tchy in written communications, so perhaps she didn't intend to be as standoffish as she appeared. I think we're all wondering, what is so damn special about her that you can't just date someone closer to you? Well llam, I guess it's that we get along well, she's intelligent, educated, hot, likes lots of affection, can spell (huge turn-off for me when girls can't spell--the geek in me), seems honest and good-natured, and we have similar senses of humor. She cracks my s*** up. Any of those qualities can be found in other people, but it's hard to find people who possess them all. Originally posted by tiki Yeah! If you're gonna go all outta yer way and sh*t, take llama out. Just joshin. God you people are dense.. lol...
alphamale Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by tanbark813 Well llam, I guess it's that we get along well, she's intelligent, educated, hot, likes lots of affection, can spell (huge turn-off for me when girls can't spell--the geek in me), seems honest and good-natured, and we have similar senses of humor. She cracks my s*** up. Any of those qualities can be found in other people, but it's hard to find people who possess them all. and you know all of this from spending one wknd together?
johan Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Well llam, I guess it's that we get along well, she's intelligent, educated, hot, likes lots of affection, can spell (huge turn-off for me when girls can't spell--the geek in me), seems honest and good-natured, and we have similar senses of humor. She cracks my s*** up. Whoa. I also am intelligent, educated, hot, affectionate, I won all the spelling bees, I'm honest and good-natured. Not sure about the sense of humor part, but I have a girlfriend anyway. And we only live about 1200 miles apart. Damn.
Author tanbark813 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale and you know all of this from spending one wknd together? No, some of that was discovered via online communication.
Author tanbark813 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by johan Whoa. I also am intelligent, educated, hot, affectionate, I won all the spelling bees, I'm honest and good-natured. Not sure about the sense of humor part, but I have a girlfriend anyway. And we only live about 1200 miles apart. Damn. Ummmm, I'm not gay, bro.
alphamale Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by tanbark813 No, some of that was discovered via online communication. that is even more ridiculous!
johan Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Ummmm, I'm not gay, bro. Yeah. Me neither. Kind of lost my head for a minute reading your post.
Author tanbark813 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by johan Yeah. Me neither. Kind of lost my head for a minute reading your post. Understood.
tiki Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by tanbark813 God you people are dense.. Hey! You're the one considering dating the girl that lives in BFE.
alphamale Posted February 14, 2005 Posted February 14, 2005 Originally posted by tiki Hey! You're the one considering dating the girl that lives in BFE. Butt f***ked Egypt.... i've never understood the mentality of meeting online and then flying 2000 miles to meet someone with 2% probability of hitting it off in person. makes no sense to me.
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