Jump to content

Interracial couples: how did you deal with the opposition from society?

Ian Fleming

By Ian Fleming
in General Relationship Discussion

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

BeholdtheMan Established Member

BeholdtheMan

Posted
Posted
Even guys of my own race don't give me crap about it.

 

Black guys with a hood mentality don't give you crap about it? I dated a Black girl before and the "hood" Black guys would hit on her in front of me. I almost got into a few fights

  • Like 1
Eggplant Established Member

Eggplant

Posted
Posted

I genuinely don't give a **** if random people stare, and particularly if I'm absorbed in a happy relationship.

Baller25 Established Member

Baller25

Posted
Posted
Just 2 days go a black guy started hitting on my girlfriend and when he saw me with her he kind of threw a tantrum.

 

He sounds like a black guy that likes white chicks but can only get the fatties — he then got angry when he saw that even an Indian guy could get the type of girl that he wasn't able to.

 

The minority girls are upset because they're thinking "look, a white girl got one of our good ones". I'm surprised that this is coming from an Indian-White relationship, it's usually more common coming from black and latina girls.

 

No racial (I personally think that Indians & blonde girls look pretty good together, like the dolls on a wedding cake).

Baller25 Established Member

Baller25

Posted
Posted (edited)
I am white and I primarily date Asian girls. Dated black/white before, too. My "favorite" girls are Indian, but I never had a relationship with one. They always seem to be told that only other Indian guys are acceptable. Meh.

 

Indian, arab and jewish women are definitely the only ones that almost always only date their own.

 

My current gf is Chinese. Asian/White is probably the most common and "accepted" coupling. Even though we're in NYC, we do get a few stares here and there from only other Chinese. Especially her.

 

Humans are hard-wired into grouping people by race, similar to how we instinctively group cars by colour before make/model. Although it is being racial, it isn't racist at all when they stare as it's different groups together. Try to imagine 4 cars of the same model, 2 of them are silver paired together and the other 2 are silver and red — the pair with the silver and red is going to get more attention because of their difference in colour.

 

The older people though sometimes give disapproving stares. I know her family doesn't really think much of me either.

Old people can disapprove of anything, actually that might just be their natural look that your misunderstanding :p

Do you think that if you were Chinese guy it would be any different with her parents? I'm not married nor have kids and I already hate the future guy that's going to date my future daughter :laugh:

Edited by Baller25
DKT3 Established Member

DKT3

Posted
Posted

Life is too short to focus on what other may or may not think about who you love and choose to spend your life with.

 

I'm a 41 year old black man who has been with the same white woman (first gen American. Parents came from Wales) since I was 17 years old (mostly, complicated story). We had some slight issues with her mom way back when. Understandable, I had the outwards appearance of a thug. Her family is wealthy with abit of an snobby attitude. They love me to death now, my parents may like her more then they do me.

 

We've built a wonderful life together with some bumps along the way, very few along racial lines, and we have walked life together through high school, college, first jobs, first house, two kids third on the way.

 

Find someone you love and live your life.

  • Like 2
stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted
I'm surprised that this is coming from an Indian-White relationship, it's usually more common coming from black and latina girls.

 

 

I don't thing black and latina women care who Indian men date. Maybe they care who black and latino men date but not really Indian men. If this happened to OP this is very rare.

  • 4 weeks later...
  • Author
Ian Fleming Member

Ian Fleming

Posted
  • Author
Posted

I do get into a lot of interrogation like scenarios with black girls who see me with my girlfriend and are quick to bring up the relationship. Often they ask me questions such as "would you date a black girl?" to which my response is a no because I am simply not attracted to them but then from there it gets more confrontational. One time this girl who knew me from a class of mines asked me that question and when I said I am just not into black women she threw a tantrum which resulted in her going into some storming rage like scenario.

 

Now to be fair, most attractive black girls or black girls from well off areas rarely do this, it is usually black girls who are from more urbanized areas that do.

 

Another group of people that give me a tough time over it are men from other minority groups. I have been in situations where latino, black, and asian guys started staring up and down at my girlfriend and when we would hold hands they would make racist remarks.

 

Again, in this situation, it is more of a class thing too. Many of the guys that do this seem to be a part of urban culture, wear baggy clothes, backwards hats, and even have tattoos. A lot of the educated guys rarely do this.

 

With that said, I am surprised that white guys whether they be rich and preppy or more country do not give a care in the world about it. If anything I met my girlfriend through a guy that was white himself.

 

The lesson I have learned is that it seems in lower class areas of cities, race matters quite a lot. The people that are from such areas tend to be more racist and just looking for trouble at every turn. I have avoided going to such areas with my girlfriend but in my city you can find people at these areas going to venues in well off places and just looking for trouble.

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted

Nothing but live your life. People in general are never going to approve all decisions you make in life. If you are happy and treated well then that is all that matters.

  • Like 1
you_can_not_see_me Established Member

you_can_not_see_me

Posted
Posted

I m half middle eastern half white living in the US, most people assume I m either southern european or a darker white dude, until they hear my name or I tell them my background.

 

I have tried to date girls from just about all races except a black girl simply because I haven't been in a situation with a black girl to date, but I do find black girls attractive too.

 

no one really cares who I date, the most that has happened is a friend joking about it in a friendly way.

 

My dad would prefer I dated/married a middle eastern girl, but he knows I am going to date whoever I want so he's pretty much accepted it.

Got it Established Member

Got it

Posted
Posted
I would like to know the following:

 

1. Your race and race of your partner

2. Your location or a general description of it

3. Issues you faced

4. How you guys dealt with them

 

I am an east indian male who is in a relationship with a girl that has blonde hair, green eyes, and white skin with freckles. haven't faced too many issues from white or even indian people but I do get a lot of hate from men of other minority groups. Just 2 days go a black guy started hitting on my girlfriend and when he saw me with her he kind of threw a tantrum. I also get a lot of interrogation from women of minority backgrounds who try to make me feel guilty about being with a girl who is white, it can get irritating at times.

 

My husband is Hispanic and I am Anglo-Saxon. We are in a very metropolitan area on the East Coast. We haven't encountered any issues. Biracial relationships are pretty common in this area and something I am used to growing up. Really not a big deal.

Better Established Member

Better

Posted
Posted

I've dated several women outside of my race and I've never encountered a problem. However, I live in a big city where it is fairly common. It's probably different in a smaller town.

 

I'm white and am currently dating an Indian woman who was born in India but has spent most of her life in the US. While we sometimes have to work through cultural differences between the two of us, we've never encountered any issues with others. Her parents weren't initially thrilled that she was dating a non-Indian man, but they've come to like me as they get to know me better and it's fine now.

 

As the world becomes more multi-cultural, the number of interracial relationships is only going to go up. I've enjoyed getting to know my girlfriend's culture and she can teach me through her experience, much like I can teach her about my culture through my own eyes.

Medium.Lumo Established Member

Medium.Lumo

Posted
Posted

Well not exactly interracial, but I am Italian American with dark hair and blue eyes and my ex is a blonde green eyed WASP.

 

I'd have no issues dating other races. None. The only criteria is that she should be a good woman. And those aren't race dependent.

taiko Established Member

taiko

Posted
Posted
I would like to know the following:

 

1. Your race and race of your partner

2. Your location or a general description of it

3. Issues you faced

4. How you guys dealt with them

 

1. Like many African Americans we know of one white great, great grandmother (in most cases it would be the father). Like most Filipinos my wife knows of Spanish and Chinese ancestry.

2. city folk, Southwest Los Angeles and the southern part of the Metro Manila Philippines.

3. Nationality, and perceived social class not racial issues in our case but those went away with time. Besides her parents relative local staus took a fall with the fall of Marcos's government.

 

The times they have changed. My parents lived under and I was born into official segregation. I was raised under de facto segregation in Los Angeles besides school teachers knowing only fellow Blacks and Asians by name until I enlisted in the US Army.

 

However in this century whether in Los Angeles or Manila there is no issue. I am no longer a GI using a local girl when in Manila or a Black man with an "off white" wife while in South Central Los Angeles

Got it Established Member

Got it

Posted
Posted
to all of you people saying hispanic, you know that is an ethnicity right? I don't consider a guy like messi or raul esparza dating a white woman to be interracial but if you are talking someone like this then it is interracial.

 

http://aloftyexistence.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/adam-rodriguez5.jpg

 

I don't understand. How would you define them? I am following the US government's EEO employee self identification criteria.

 

What criteria are you using? Are you going by skin tone?

MissBee Established Member

MissBee

Posted
Posted
I don't understand. How would you define them? I am following the US government's EEO employee self identification criteria.

 

What criteria are you using? Are you going by skin tone?

 

The US census has 5 race categories but the employment self-identification criteria includes race and ethnicity.

 

Hispanic isn't a race, it's an ethnicity. You have black Hispanics, white Hispanics and other kinds of Hispanic people. Hispanic denotes being from a country that was a colony of Spain, but in those countries you still have different races, particularly since most had the slave trade and colonizers, colonizers being white Spanish often and of course black enslaved people, which over time make up the population of the country which includes people of white, black and mostly a mixed racial background, but all are Hispanic.

 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...