babycakees Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 I've been seeing this guy for almost 3 months. We met via OLD and things are going great. He's a wonderful man and I really am enjoying spending time with him and there is zero red flags or doubts/questions. His friends are already calling me his girlfriend, but we have yet to have the "exclusive" talk. I'm not seeing anyone else and I am positive he isn't either. So my question is, should I bring up "the talk" or lay low and wait for him to bring it up? Thanks for any opinions!
Baller25 Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 Flat out ask him if he is seeing anyone else. If he says no then that's as good as an exclusive relationship, just wait for him to confirm that you're bf/gf because in your case it would just be labelling something that already is in place
Gaeta Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 It's very personal to each person. I bring up the exclusivity talk after 5-6 dates. I am not willing to invest time and feelings further than that without exclusivity.
Atticus9292012 Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 Maybe I just date crappy guys, but in my experience if I have to bring it up after that long, the conversation isn't going to be about us becoming an exclusive couple. Its usually a line of B.S. about how he doesn't want to be exclusive. If you have doubts about your relationship, pull back. 1
Haydn Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 I have never had an exclusive talk with any girl. Sound like you are already happy together. What if he asked you are you seeing anyone else? How would you feel? You 2 seem happy.
Author babycakees Posted June 10, 2014 Author Posted June 10, 2014 It's going wonderful? Then why isn't this a natural topic of conversation after 3 months? One needs to question these 'great relationships' in which a partner isn't comfortable talking about an issue. I hope you aren't having sex without being completely certain that he does not have another partner. No actually we haven't had sex yet. I'm not going to do that unless I'm in a committed relationship.
Haydn Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 3 months and no sex yet? I thought you were together, together. 3 months should be long enough to know if you are both committed.
askmrknowitall Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 Does he hear his friends calling you his girlfriend ? Try saying this to him, but ONLY if he's heard them. "Your friends are referring to me as your girlfriend, I'm fine with that, are you OK with that ?" (do not speak again until he answers that question). If he says yes he is. Then you say, good, the only reason why I was asking you is because you hadn't ask me yet and I didn't want you to be uncomfortable if you didn't feel that way about us yet. If he says no, REMAIN CALM (smile), Oh!, if it makes you uncomfortable maybe you should speak to them about saying it.
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