PuppetLife Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 I feel like I'm insane. I have been feeling this way for about half a year now. I have been getting jealous at my friends a lot lately. I used to be jealous when they go somewhere without me, or take pictures without me. And I'm scared that they will ditch me or something like that. But that's not the case anymore. I get jealous simply when they talk and I'm not included in the conversation, when they are both online on Facebook and commenting on each others' pictures or status. I want to know what they are talking about, or what they are doing. Sometimes I would do things with only one of them, and I don't see a problem with it. But I get very jealous when they do something without me. I didn't tell them any of this and I'm not going to. But I don't know what to do. I want to stop feeling this way, because I know there is no point. Friends don't last forever, and even if they do, I don't own them. I need to open up and understand that it's ok for a friend to have more than one friend. But I can't do it. I feel so bad and disgusting for getting jealous of their relationships. Please help me.
Author PuppetLife Posted June 11, 2014 Author Posted June 11, 2014 And like today, they were hangout with a friend that I don't really know and they were totally excluding me. They keep talking and taking pictures. I didn't join in with them because I don't want to look pathetic and show them how desperate I am to be included. But I feel really down. My head is telling me that it's ok, but they don't include you, they aren't good friends. But it hurts, and it makes me sad.
Diabloterr Posted June 11, 2014 Posted June 11, 2014 Why do you feel that your friends must include you? Is it as simple as reassuring yourself that you matter to others or is your feelings much more tied into loneliness when others do not look your way? It is also hard to help without some demographics about you and your friends.
Author PuppetLife Posted June 11, 2014 Author Posted June 11, 2014 Why do you feel that your friends must include you? QUOTE] I actually don't know why...and so I'm thinking about it clearly now. I want to be included because I get upset if I don't. And why is that? Because I want to be good friends with them like they are to one another. Why? So that I have friends and that I'm not lonely. Why am I insecure about the fact that they chat on facebook? Because I'm scared that they secretly hate me and are bitching about me. But even if they are, I'm not going to do anything about it. Why? Because I don't want to cause trouble, I want to keep the friendship. Why? Because I don't want to be lonely. So the conclusion is that I'm insecure about being lonely and not having friends, I jealous that they are good friends to each other and I'm not. What should I do?
Diabloterr Posted June 11, 2014 Posted June 11, 2014 All I can do is give you advice, it is up to you to choose how you are going to live. What you really need to ask yourself is whether you care about your friends, or are you just using those people to feed your ego. If you care about someone you will allow them to live without subjugating them to your every desires. Yes, their is a chance that one day you will look up and have little to no friends, often through the process of self discovery you end up losing friends and making more friends. Do not fear change in circumstance, embrace it. If you are a nice person and an honest person, you will never be alone, like minded people will seek your company. If people talk bad about you behind their back, then they really aren't you friends anyway. Good Luck,
Recommended Posts