Mjm1014 Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 Okay so I met a girl on Tinder about a week ago, and up until our date she was sending me cute texts, seemed to want to talk on the phone etc...we talked a ton. Last night we went on our first date. I had a good time, lots of conversation and she wouldn't stop smiling the whole time. At the end of the date I went in for a kiss and she accepted. When I tried pulling away from her when I thought the kiss was over she said Wait, and kept wanting to kiss me! Since the date I've hardly heard from her...one word texts all day and when I called her tonight she seemed bored and didn't seem to want to talk and she said she was tired so I let her go. My instinct all day was telling me she didn't want to talk though. I've been confused in her change of behavior so I asked her via text after the call because I'm sick of wondering how she feels. She said "all I can say is that we had good conversation and that you're cute..it's going to take a few more dates to see if I'm interested. If you don't understand I'm sorry." I totally get that but is it weird of me to not understand the change of behavior if I'm still somewhat qualifying...I feel like by now after a date I have some sort of idea if I like someone and if I do I still talk to them? Her lack of interest makes me want to throw in the towel. All of a sudden no effort but says next weekend we can hang out MAYBE. Should I just go no contact a few days and if I don't hear find someone more into me or do I totally take this as rejection. It just confuses me because I asked her if I could see her soon over texts and she said "for sure"
drdre Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 It is one date. She is on tinder (and you can assume you are not the only guy she swiped right to). She needs more time because she is checking out the scene and matching guys left and right. But that is normal on tinder, girl will date multiple people just like guys do. If you had a good time, ask her out again, hang out and have fun. Either a) she will like you better than others and you guys will become a thing, or b) she will like someone else and until then, you have enjoyed yourself. One date is waaay too soon to be expecting anything out of someone, specially if you met online and you know that person is checking out their options.
guest572 Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 I don't think I have ever been certain of where I stand in the initial few dates or even the first few months of dating a person!!! That is normal though, it takes time to get to know someone. She could be meeting other men or simply needs some time. There isn't much else for you to do but wait and see how things pan out after a few dates. 2
Assasda Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 One date and you get super needy. A good way to turn a girl all the way off. My advice is move on and date other women, if she wants to talk to you she will 1
germain Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 First take it easy. Second yes, I would give it a few days before hitting her up again, because you may have come on a little strong. Call her a day or so before you want to go out, and tell her she should do ____ with you on ____. If you guys can't make it work, wait a few days into next week and try again. After that, I'd move on. She basically told you "I want to continue seeing you, but you need to ask me out." This hot/cold thing will usually continue until you guys are in a committed relationship. You can't jump the gun and definitely do not call them out on it. You're way too early into things to be having a "how do we feel" conversation. Date other people too until you guys are having sex - that's how I am anyway.
BeholdtheMan Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 She said "all I can say is that we had good conversation and that you're cute..it's going to take a few more dates to see if I'm interested. If you don't understand I'm sorry." You're being needy. Don't you have other options? This should be your response: "Next"
Recommended Posts