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Does anyone think the procedure to get a girl is too exhausting??

BarackObama

By BarackObama
in General Relationship Discussion

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normal person Established Member

normal person

Posted
Posted
Seeing a woman that has attractive features, and being attracted to her as far as dating are two totally different things. Where I live, most women are avg looking or below. So the few very attractive women that are here get bombarded with attention, pervs, and every jerkoff that thinks he can pick her up. So I always ignore them, and give them no attention. They have proved to me my entire life its not worth my time to even try.

 

All the guys that I know, that live in the Youngstown area agree that when they leave this area, and go to Pittsburgh, Columbus, Cleveland....basically anywhere except Youngstown, the median attractiveness of women goes up considerably.

 

Well that's something you neglected to say earlier. It sounds to me that if you're eager for more success you need to change your circumstances. Consider going to a city that's more conducive to getting what you want.

 

 

I dont understand where people on here constantly put words into my mouth....where did I mention or give the hint that I consider vast quantities of women as a potential match for me? Of all the people on here....I am the last person to assume that. I know damn well that not everyone is attracted to everyone.

 

Sorry, that was a bit confusing on my part, my apologies. I thought you implied it by saying

 

If I dont know her as a person, how am I supposed to flirt and be attracted to her??

 

Effectively saying that you don't first discriminate on looks. Your first limitation should be "people I find physically attractive," not "people I'm yet to flirt with to determine if I'm attracted to them." Because as it stands, you're talking like you don't even know who you're attracted to and it could potentially be any women on Earth. Why put it the hands of the potential and the unknown? You should be able to make your first discrimination with just your eyes. Then it's concrete and certain.

 

You should be attracted to the person first (that's that irrational biology coming into play), then flirt with them to create some sexual tension and see if they like you. Your whole methodology seems strange to me.

 

 

My complaint is that I rarely get a chance by most women, because the are too stuck up, and judge me on my height without even giving me a chance to open my mouth.

 

Yeah, some will do that, unfortunately. You'll have to have something else about you that makes them overlook it. What's your plan? Are you in med school? Are you funny? What else about you are you expecting them to like?

nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

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Obviously I'll be single the rest of my life then. Because I dont know how to play all these social f'n games that the rest of you play with each other face-to-face....lying, bending the truth, sugar coating, making each other feel comfortable....I will never know how to be anything but myself, which is upfront and honest. Everyone else knows how to balance the line of bullsh*t and charisma when they meet for a date....so theres no point in me even trying anymore.

 

 

You have a job, right?

 

You have to play social games heavily to get one, then keep playing them every day to keep one. The beginning of a relationship is no different.

 

And again... you should consider moving. Your area sounds terrible. lol

 

Trust me. I moved to New York City from areas that were more like yours.

 

Plus, I'm tall here! ha ha I tower over most of the Asians, Hispanics, Italians, etc. When standing in a crowded subway car, I can see over just about everyone's head. Plenty of guys are likre 5'6" here and have girls or are married. Why? The city is chock full of my favorite type.... 5'4" and under brunettes. ;)

  • Like 1
nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

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I dont have to play games socially at work. I have a job because I know what the f*ck I'm doing, and do it good. Not because of my social skills. I rarely even interact with people at work...my job does not require it.

 

I dont need to move to NYC....I could go anywhere besides NE Ohio.....they are all better than here.

 

Ok, I'm definitely buying that you have a job because you know what f*ck you're doing, not because of social skills. :D

 

You'd have a better job with better social skills.

 

Look... not all of us were born with social skills. I had my first computer at age 8. I was programming in BASIC. I went to the Dr Who convention. I was horribly scarred with acne. I had braces. I had glasses. I had damn backne. I didn't understand style and I had zero social skills.

 

One day in JR high, I decided it was time to learn social skills. I managed them well enough, managed skateboarding and snowboarding well enough to be the most awkward guy in the popular table at luch. :lmao::lmao:

 

So that was the first step. How did I meet my captain of the cheer leading squad hs girlfriend? Very awkwardly, while we were snowboarding.

 

So I had a basic semblance of social skills.

 

I used those same skills, plus more and more honing them to get tons of girls in college, while being a full nerd by day in the Physics building and running over to do computer science courses. Littls by little, going out and actively working on learning to improve my social skills, I got more and more girls in college. It's a hookup culture, so it's basically infinite there. The stories I could tell... So now my social skills, after all these years of trying to hone them, were finally ok. Not perfect. Pretty good though.

 

By the time I graduated, I learned enough to be like the main guy the president of a sorority of super hottie and her cronies all liked and occasionally fought over. I was the +only+ person with a penis allowed into the house late night (sleeping with the president) and was able to enjoy their rich girl kitchen with chef.

 

I had already learned about science and computers. Those are easy. But understanding women and how to have social skills? Now that was a challenge!!

 

I kept at it. Honed them more and in my first job got the newly divorced office super hottie everyone was drooling over as my girlfriend. For like a year. And I'm a computer programmer at this point mind you! Not a sales guy or whatever.

 

Eventually, i couldn't resist the urge to try my skills out professionally. I moved into sales, international sales, then started my own software company. All the while honing my skillsand continually LEARNING more and more about people (women are people, by the way... ha ha) .

 

The point of this little synopsis of my life is that YOU CAN DO IT TOO. If I, the kid at the beginning of this story, could do it, anyone can. All you need to do is devote the same drive that you used to be good at what you do at work... and get yourself good at understanding people.

 

It's just a set of skills, like you have at work.

nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

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Cool story bro

 

And after sharing all of that, you're just going to be a lazy sack of sh+t and do nothing to improve yourself aren't you? :(

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Monm82 Established Member

Monm82

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I think there is too much pressure on most males when it comes to the early dating stages.

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normal person Established Member

normal person

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I think there is too much pressure on most males when it comes to the early dating stages.

 

Care to elaborate? I've never felt like this.

R3d Established Member

R3d

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What do you think guys?

 

Yes.

 

10char

GoodOnPaper Established Member

GoodOnPaper

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I think there is too much pressure on most males when it comes to the early dating stages.

 

Care to elaborate? I've never felt like this.

 

A couple of ways I felt the pressure manifest itself:

 

1. If you think you need sex and/or a relationship to validate your self-worth, it's easy to start thinking that you have to win a woman over. This turns into "I better do this exactly right or it will be another instance that proves I'm a loser."

 

2. Our culture's sense of masculinity is that we are supposed to be able to bed women on a regular basis. I suspect a good number of us who have "nice guy" issues really don't like a lot of women but if we don't date at all until we find someone we really like, we'll feel like we're falling behind. So we press too hard, too often.

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M30USA Established Member

M30USA

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I'm not sure that's American. That's evolution.

 

Only in a highly domesticated civilization. When disaster strikes or we are thrown back into the wild frontier, it's the opposite--women swarm for the protection and support of men. The more domesticated a society is, the more power women have and the more they are unidirectionally catered to. This is pretty well known and it's not my own idea. History and reason support this.

Edited by M30USA
jay1983 Established Member

jay1983

Posted
Posted
Only in a highly domesticated civilization. When disaster strikes or we are thrown back into the wild frontier, it's the opposite--women swarm for the protection and support of men. The more domesticated a society is, the more power women have and the more they are unidirectionally catered to. This is pretty well known and it's not my own idea. History and reason support this.

 

I've been to Spain and Brasil, the women are much different there, nice, respectable and more aware of things going on in the world. I'm not sure if you've seen jersey shore? It's a reality show where the guys and girls spend their summer in a beach house, party and pick girls up at the clubs. Well in season 4 they go Italy and not one of them able to take home and sleep with an Italian girl. lol Some people predict the US will have a backlash in the distant future. Men will stop hitting on them, white knights will wake up, ect. I for one have given up. Ladies can do whatever makes them happy, I don't care anymore. "shrugs"

  • Like 1
nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

Posted
Posted
Only in a highly domesticated civilization. When disaster strikes or we are thrown back into the wild frontier, it's the opposite--women swarm for the protection and support of men. The more domesticated a society is, the more power women have and the more they are unidirectionally catered to. This is pretty well known and it's not my own idea. History and reason support this.

 

 

 

Anarchy now, then! ;)

  • Like 1
kart180 Established Member

kart180

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Yes, but all I see everywhere is tobacco users which why I just gave up. I need to be able to work on me and if I date a women her smelling of tobacco all the time

M30USA Established Member

M30USA

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I've been to Spain and Brasil, the women are much different there, nice, respectable and more aware of things going on in the world. I'm not sure if you've seen jersey shore? It's a reality show where the guys and girls spend their summer in a beach house, party and pick girls up at the clubs. Well in season 4 they go Italy and not one of them able to take home and sleep with an Italian girl. lol Some people predict the US will have a backlash in the distant future. Men will stop hitting on them, white knights will wake up, ect. I for one have given up. Ladies can do whatever makes them happy, I don't care anymore. "shrugs"

 

You sound like a MGTOW man.

jay1983 Established Member

jay1983

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You sound like a MGTOW man.

 

Not completely, I'll still talk, joke around be friends, hold doors open, if I'm asked for help lifting something or opening a jar, that's not a problem. I'm just sick of jumping through hoops and paying for stuff. If a women is interested she can call me. Flaking has become an epidemic so I won't set up a date anymore. I'll just tell em "hey I'll be at XYZ bar tonight, you're welcome to come if you'd like" If they show up, cool, I'm doing my thing whether they come or not.

  • Like 1
nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

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I have to agree with Jay here. Women from cultures other than the US are, on a whole, better people. I suspect that goes both ways and so are the men. Good food for thought. I may look outside the USA to find my next serious relationship. I'm not a fan of the way people act, think or behave here. Jersey Shore really sums it up. Watch the girls on that show. That's 99% of all single women.

serial muse Established Member

serial muse

Posted
Posted (edited)
I have to agree with Jay here. Women from cultures other than the US are, on a whole, better people. I suspect that goes both ways and so are the men. Good food for thought. I may look outside the USA to find my next serious relationship. I'm not a fan of the way people act, think or behave here. Jersey Shore really sums it up. Watch the girls on that show. That's 99% of all single women.

 

So by the transitive property, Jersey Shore depicts 99% of all single men, too?

 

Did you do your GTL today, then?

 

:lmao:

Edited by serial muse
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nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

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So by the transitive property, Jersey Shore depicts 99% of all single men, too?

 

Did you do your GTL today, then?

 

:lmao:

 

 

Well, in my area, yes! :lmao:

 

If I only knew what GTL was, I could have a good laugh with you.

  • Like 1
jay1983 Established Member

jay1983

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I have to agree with Jay here. Women from cultures other than the US are, on a whole, better people. I suspect that goes both ways and so are the men. Good food for thought. I may look outside the USA to find my next serious relationship. I'm not a fan of the way people act, think or behave here. Jersey Shore really sums it up. Watch the girls on that show. That's 99% of all single women.

 

I've heard a lot of guys say that, but how? The company I worked for had a project in Italy, but I wasn't selected for it. Going overseas is expensive and 2 weeks of vacation might not be enough time to meet somebody, much less date them and get into a serious relationship.

Glinda.Good Established Member

Glinda.Good

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The Jersey Shore guys go perfectly well with the Jersey Shore girls. It's not like a wretched depiction of American girls, it's a depiction of a population of like minded young people.

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Woggle Established Member

Woggle

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Jersey Shore doesn't even represent the actual placed called the Jersey Shore so how can it represent America. Before it was a tv show it was a place.

  • Like 1
nofeelings22 Established Member

nofeelings22

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Jersey Shore doesn't even represent the actual placed called the Jersey Shore so how can it represent America. Before it was a tv show it was a place.

 

 

I think I'd go the other way with it....

 

The Jersey Shore show represents a larger number of people in the USA than even live at the entire shore of New Jersey. :lmao:

 

There are a huge number of people with similar dating styles all over the USA. In urban areas.

jay1983 Established Member

jay1983

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Posted
Jersey Shore doesn't even represent the actual placed called the Jersey Shore so how can it represent America. Before it was a tv show it was a place.

 

Because that's america you see on the show. It doesn't matter whether they're in Jersey or Miami, those are americans and what you see is what it is. It's not 100% but for the most part, it's pretty accurate. Using the name Jersey shore is neither here nor there.

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lollipopspot Established Member

lollipopspot

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Get yourself around a higher class of people. I don't know anyone like that.

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jay1983 Established Member

jay1983

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Get yourself around a higher class of people. I don't know anyone like that.

 

My friends don't act like that, we're just regular people. When it comes to finding singles is when I come across girls like that.

 

Note - They're usually not that extreme, they yell "hey I'm a skank" They're more subtile, but the end result is the same.

  • Like 1
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