joshkl Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 (edited) I will try to explain and be as neutral as possible, but can be hard as I can only tell things from my perspective. So I met this girl on an online dating site more than a month ago. We exchanged some texts on the website for a week and then I invited her to some event. It was just a casual invitation and not a date as such. She showed up for the event but somehow we did not spend much time together. We had a little chat and then went home. Next day I sent some texts on mobile and she also replied them eagerly and we had a short conversation. Things were looking good. Following days, I sent few texts on irregular intervals so as not to overwhelm her and keep in touch. Initially, she used to reply and ask questions in return. But gradually, she became more and more concise (one or two word replies) and stopped asking anything back. After 5 days are gone, I asked her out. She agreed but gave excuses like she does not want to go that specific place or she is busy blah blah blah. And suggested that we meet later. She told that she will be out of town next to next week and we can meet once she is back. I was like it is still two weeks away and if possible, we can meet in the coming week. But she did not reply anything so finally I agreed (I was going to agree anyways). I tried to continue the communication through texting, but I stopped enjoying one sided conversation and same boring stuff "how was your day?". so I reduced the frequency. The day before she left the town, she messaged me that she is leaving and also gave me her email (I could not understand why, if she can access email, most probably she can also access texts). Anyways, I could not send her any message for following 3 days as I was busy and moreover, I did not want to disturb her as she was supposed to be traveling. On fourth day she blocked me on mobile . I sent her an email, asking about her trip and all. But she did not reply for next two days. I shot another mail to clarify if everything is fine and if I have done something wrong to deserve blocking. I also made very clear my interest in her (maybe it was a mistake to mention that?). Next day I got her reply indicating that she will happy to meet. But against my 2 emails of 10 sentences each, her reply was just sentence long. And I am still blocked. I understand that she maybe playing hard to get, but if she blocks all the doors to communication (not texting, not meeting ) then what should I infer out of all this? Is she still interested? I know she was interested, but it has already been more than 3 weeks since we met at that event. Is it worth investing more time and emotions into this. I like her and she seems to have many qualities I prefer, but do not know her that well yet. BTW, she is 25, I am late 20s. Sorry for long post. Edited June 8, 2014 by joshkl
MidwestUSA Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 You waited way too long to ask her on a 'real' date. She got tired so the chit-chat and waiting. She's moved on to other things. You set the tone by asking her to an 'event' that wasn't really a date. So she hasn't thought of you 'that way'. Live and learn. 1
Author joshkl Posted June 8, 2014 Author Posted June 8, 2014 Is it? I asked for the event within 7-8 days we started chatting online. And I asked her out for real date within 5 days we met at the event. But she gave excuses and suggested we meet later. And I guess it was clear that we will be meeting to ' know each other better'. Sorry if it was not clear above. Was it too late to ask for a date?
MidwestUSA Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 Is it? I asked for the event within 7-8 days we started chatting online. And I asked her out for real date within 5 days we met at the event. But she gave excuses and suggested we meet later. Sorry if it was not clear above. Was it too late to ask for a date? You did things backwards. You asked her to an event, and kinda put yourself in the fried zone, especially since you didn't have much contact with her at that event. Go for the date first next time.
Author joshkl Posted June 8, 2014 Author Posted June 8, 2014 Thanks for the advice. kinda put yourself in the fried zone But I am not sure if that's the case. I am still confused. Why she gave me her email address before leaving? And when I am so clear and direct with her, why still keeping me confused?
J21 Posted June 10, 2014 Posted June 10, 2014 Inviting her to an event was a huge mis-step. Not spending time together and not chatting much? What the heck was the point of her coming then? Sorry bud, but u were rude to not spend time with her and chatting more after inviting her to some event. Dont know what kind of reaction u were expecting. She probably sounded eager via text since she was excited to meet u, but that died pretty quickly judging from her subsequent actions. In any case, she's over it. Probably best to move on yourself.
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