beach Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 I don't like using the words 'not good enough' other than the lack of physical attraction he is a very respectable man. But seriously, he wasn't good enough then right? So why would you think he's an option now? He was second best then - yet now because guy #1 left the scene he suddenly becomes worth considering now? I can't see it being a good thing - when you didn't find him "absolutely worthy" back in March. 1
Author Gaeta Posted June 8, 2014 Author Posted June 8, 2014 But seriously, he wasn't good enough then right? So why would you think he's an option now? He was second best then - yet now because guy #1 left the scene he suddenly becomes worth considering now? I can't see it being a good thing - when you didn't find him "absolutely worthy" back in March. When I met this man ex bf was not in the scene yet. This man took 3 weeks to get back to me with a second date reschedule, during that time life continued for me and I started dating last bf. What changed? I am single now. The man I just broke up with was dead-gorgeous, maybe it's time to search for a man with my head and not my eyes.
rester Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 Ok, I will sound superficial I warn you. We met in the parking lot at 7 pm in front of the coffee shop. It was dark, in the winter. First thing he told me after saying hello was that this other man in the parking lot had called him up cause he needed help with something. My date instead of asking the guy how he could help him just walked in the other direction ignoring the man. I said maybe he just needed a boost or he needed someone to call a towing. My date said he did not care, he's not dying in a parking lot tonight. That killed his masculinity right in front of my eyes. I'm a guy, but I would argue that a man that would ignore someone like that would not be a man worth getting to know better.
Author Gaeta Posted June 8, 2014 Author Posted June 8, 2014 How old are you? 48, I only started dating at 45 so don't go all weird on me.
FitChick Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 You have nothing to lose by dating him again. Maybe the stars will align. Many people have clicked the second time they got together after a period of time. I've dated men I wasn't terribly attracted to but after spending more time getting to know them, something clicked and it worked. CarrieT married a man whom she described as looking like a bald chimpanzee. They are happy now. When someone treats you well it can become "addictive" and you won't settle for less later on. If you still don't feel any spark, then you have a good excuse for ending it. "I just don't feel any chemistry." You also can use the excuse of your recent breakup and that you really aren't ready for dating.
Versacehottie Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 I say this seriously in OP's best interest: It's been all of a hot minute with your last guy, I think you need to chill and re-center yourself, really. I am usually all for being on-to-the-next. But don't think that's going to help in this situation. #refocus #checkyo'selfbeforeuwreckyourself 3
HappyLove Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 (edited) I think you need to take a break from dating online guys. You've gone on over 100 online dates and you're still searching. You don't like when men approach you in public which is crazy cakes. Give all that online crap a rest and look for a potential date IRL. Your attractive and easily catch men's attention I think you need to give dating IRL a shot! It's time. "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein. Edited June 8, 2014 by HappyLove
beach Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 I think you need to take a break from dating online guys. You've gone on over 100 online dates and you're still searching. You don't like when men approach you in public which is crazy cakes. Give all that online crap a rest and look for a potential date IRL. Your attractive and easily catch men's attention I think you need to give dating IRL a shot! It's time. "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein. Albert's rendition is more mocking the idea of stupidity. Excuse me - look up the definition of "insanity" - You're more likely to see it this way: Noun: the state of being seriously mentally ill; madness. "he suffered from bouts of insanity" synonyms: mental illness, madness, dementia; More extreme foolishness or irrationality. plural noun: insanities "it might be pure insanity to take this loan" OP - why not do things different this time?
Author Gaeta Posted June 8, 2014 Author Posted June 8, 2014 I say this seriously in OP's best interest: It's been all of a hot minute with your last guy, I think you need to chill and re-center yourself, really. I am usually all for being on-to-the-next. But don't think that's going to help in this situation. #refocus #checkyo'selfbeforeuwreckyourself At the end of the day and reading this thread I think I will follow this advice and chill. And HappyLove will be happy to hear I will follow her advice and stay off line. There was 1 week between previous man and this last man, I was about to do that same thing again. Using a man to numb the loss of another one isn't gonna get me anywhere. 1
CarrieT Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 CarrieT married a man whom she described as looking like a bald chimpanzee. They are happy now. Ummmm.... I don't think I ever used that term; especially in light of the fact that my DH has a full head of hair. :roll eyes: I *did* say that I was not immediately attracted to him physically, yes, but nothing as bad as a bald chimp. 1
HappyLove Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 At the end of the day and reading this thread I think I will follow this advice and chill. And HappyLove will be happy to hear I will follow her advice and stay off line. There was 1 week between previous man and this last man, I was about to do that same thing again. Using a man to numb the loss of another one isn't gonna get me anywhere. I am not happy! I'm ecstatic!!! We have to learn from our past and try new things in life! I hope you find a great man who appreciates you soon! 1
sagetalk Posted June 9, 2014 Posted June 9, 2014 Is this what you call a man being into you? To put it mildly, yes.
Author Gaeta Posted June 23, 2014 Author Posted June 23, 2014 I decided to give this guy another go. I text him Saturday and said if he still felt like it I was free to do something together when time allows. He replied 'who's this?': So he had deleted my number. I don't blame him and at the same time I am glad he did, he has a limit after all, he earned some points. He then said he was at a bbq and he would call me the following day and he did = 10 pts for calling when he said he would and for using phone instead of text. He offered to meet later today, he said he is open to doing anything, we can go walk my dog and he'd be happy with that. He will drive to south shore where I live, he lives on the north shore = 10 pts. For being open to doing anything easy = 10 pts. For offering to involve my dog 10 pts lol.
myothernic2 Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 I decided to give this guy another go. I text him Saturday and said if he still felt like it I was free to do something together when time allows. He replied 'who's this?': So he had deleted my number. I don't blame him and at the same time I am glad he did, he has a limit after all, he earned some points. He then said he was at a bbq and he would call me the following day and he did = 10 pts for calling when he said he would and for using phone instead of text. He offered to meet later today, he said he is open to doing anything, we can go walk my dog and he'd be happy with that. He will drive to south shore where I live, he lives on the north shore = 10 pts. For being open to doing anything easy = 10 pts. For offering to involve my dog 10 pts lol. Hope it goes well!
HappyLove Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 Sounds good! You've stood your ground. I think he will take you more seriously this time. Good luck!
Author Gaeta Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 aaawww c'mon !! I gave my date a sport bar address. We meet in 30 minutes. I am home killing time. I get on FB and first thing on my wall is my brother's post Having fun at Sport bar !!!! (the same). Damn it! I don't want to go on a date with my brother, his wife and their friends sitting across the room lol
Leigh 87 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 I am not sure why you think you can get by without a romantic spark. Having a spark truly does make this more special. You are essential dating a friend. I tried this last year. I never grew the spark after months. He was wonderful too. A stable professional who was crazy about me. On the other hand I've dated a guy I wasn't initially into only to fall hard for him. When I was 16. I sincerely hope you do get the spark with this gentlemen. He seems to genuinely like you.
Author Gaeta Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 It's 10h and I am still home in my little dress *sigh* We spoke at 6h, he said he was going to be free around 8:30 and 9:00 and to text him the address. I did. Nothing since 6h.
HappyLove Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 What?! I can't believe he would screw this up after all that!
Author Gaeta Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 What?! I can't believe he would screw this up after all that! I cannot imagine what kind of explanation would justify this. Another I broke my phone or I was at the hospital.
myothernic2 Posted June 24, 2014 Posted June 24, 2014 It's 10h and I am still home in my little dress *sigh* We spoke at 6h, he said he was going to be free around 8:30 and 9:00 and to text him the address. I did. Nothing since 6h. How rude! You should meet your brother and others with your little dress on. 1
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