Called my mother the C word and she freaking punched me

June 8, 2014

It was a stupid argument yesterday and yes I did called her a stupid c***. Thing is she didn't slap me but actually freaking punched me. As a result, it drew a bit of blood on my mouth. I swear had it been a guy friend or my older brother, I would have punch him back hard and wrestle him to the ground. I ain't afraid of my father either. I have gotten into two physical fights with him and my mother had to separate us.

I immediately told her how I hated her and went to my room sulking. 16 year-old boy here. I just don't hit girls nor women but I'm soooo upset. I don't think it was right what she did either. Isn't she also in the wrong?

June 8, 2014

You don't call women the c word, especially your mother. If you're getting into fights with your father and doing stuff like that it sounds like you needed a punch in the face. Luckily enough you have a mother who loves you enough to give you one.

June 8, 2014

You don't call women the c word, especially your mother.

I was just upset like anyone can. It's not like I intentionally mean it. I would have probably even apologize by now if she wouldn't have reacted by punching me hard enough to draw blood on my mouth.

If you're getting into fights with your father and doing stuff like that it sounds like you needed a punch in the face. Luckily enough you have a mother who loves you enough to give you one.

In both of those physical fights with my father, it was me pushing him back, then comes to hits. Then he continues punching me so I replied back then. In the first fight, he pinned me down fast and won but the second time it was an even match; both of us were on the floor. If a male punches me, I can punch him back. Edited June 8, 2014 by drummerdude98

June 8, 2014

I was just upset like anyone can. It's not like I intentionally mean it. I would have probably even apologize by now if she wouldn't have reacted by punching me hard enough to draw blood on my mouth.

What you did and what she did are two very different things.

You had a choice, you could not have called her a c***.

And she had a choice, she could not have punched you in the face.

One bad behaviour does not excuse the other.

The question is which one of you two is actually smart enough to realize this and apologize.

In both of those physical fights with my father, it was me pushing him back, then comes to hits. Then he continues punching me so I replied back then. In the first fight, he pinned me down fast and won but the second time it was an even match; both of us were on the floor. If a male punches me, I can punch him back.

He was your dad.

Don't you see the problem with that ?

One reason why you should not punch back is to not sink to his level.

It takes more strength to actually not go into that pattern of punching, than to actually punch.

June 8, 2014

You called your MOTHER a "stupid c***"??? I say fat lip deserved. You obviously have some issues with your parents regarding respect and boundaries. I don't know your back story or situation, but I have a 14 yr old son who once balled his fist up and acted like he was going to strike me and used the F-Bomb. Once I calmed down, I clearly let him know that if it ever happened again, he would have two options:

A. A year in a military boot camp

B. He could become a ward of the state.

His father (my ex) went batsh*t when I told him what happened, and his sense of entitlement and arrogance was definitely taken down a peg or two. Since then, things have been golden and my son and I have never had a better relationship.

Sounds like you and your parents need some outside intervention.

June 8, 2014

Ive never called my mother that....Id probably get a frying pan to the skull for it...

So she punched you..So what....Be a man and take it...You should know better..

TFY

June 8, 2014

It is illegal for an adult to punch a minor. She could go to jail for that. And so could your father for punching you.

You and your parents are all out of control. And you all need help.

June 8, 2014

One bad behaviour does not excuse the other.
The question is which one of you two is actually smart enough to realize this and apologize.

I think she should first but she won't. Sucks that it'll be me then though I don't feel like it. It's like we're always in the wrong. Not fair.

He was your dad.

Don't you see the problem with that ?

One reason why you should not punch back is to not sink to his level.
It takes more strength to actually not go into that pattern of punching, than to actually punch.

Even if he's my dad, that didn't mean I had to be a punching bag for him and just stand there, do nothing. True, maybe when it was first a shove, should have not proceeded.

June 8, 2014

Isn't she also in the wrong?

It sounds like she's made a long series of huge mistakes and the result is you.

June 8, 2014

I think she should first but she won't. Sucks that it'll be me then though I don't feel like it. It's like we're always in the wrong. Not fair.
Even if he's my dad, that didn't mean I had to be a punching bag for him and just stand there, do nothing. True, maybe when it was first a shove, should have not proceeded.

YOU have some serious issues that need to be worked out. Don't apologize if you don't mean it and can't even see the fault in your actions. The pain a mother feels when the child she has brought into the world, loved, and raised turns around and calls her a "stupid c**t" is beyond any pain you felt from that pop to the mouth.

June 8, 2014

I can't believe people are actually acting okay with this OBVIOUS cycle of violence. You are going to grow up a guy who hits and abuses his kids and possibly partner as well because of how your idiot parents treat you. PUNCHING you is NOT okay unless it is self defense. Disgusting. Your parents sound fked up. OBVIOUSLY calling people names is not okay but punching in response is inexcusable. You all 3 need help, your family sounds violence and dysfunctional and it sounds like there is NO respect whatsoever between the 3 of you.

June 8, 2014

For those saying the kid deserved to get punch, please get real. If you have kids, would you ever punch them? I'm guessing not, so don't say he deserved to be punched.

OP, your family has many issues, both physical and verbal from everywhere. It's clear you have no respect for your parents, and your parents have none for you, and no one knows any boundaries in that household. As some have said, intervention is needed but you're just what, 16 I think you said? Maybe you could talk to one of the counselors at your school, just to get yourself help at the very least.

Also, don't expect an apology from your mother and feel like "she owes it to you". Everyone was wrong here, including you, but I highly doubt anyone is going to apologize. Focus on getting yourself some help, and to have a plan to leave when you become 18, because I'm willing to be the environment you live in is very toxic.

June 8, 2014

Nope, I know she's not going to apologize just like neither my father nor I apologized for those two fights. We just started talking normally about 1 week later and that was that.

I have to say this is the first time my mother ever punched me. I caught me by surprise since I was probably expecting a slap. I did backtalked at her long ago when I was 9 or so and she slapped me for that. I haven't done it for the longest till now.

Yes, I'm just finished my sophomore year recently. Still got 2 yrs to graduate.

June 8, 2014

Your house is too violent. It sounds as though that's how you grew up.

If I were you I would lay low until you can get out and support yourself.

She shouldn't have hit you. You shouldn't have called her that word.

If you want to do better in life, and be around a better class of people than these folks who raised you, clean up your language (do not ever use that word again!), learn to solve disagreements in ways other than using violence, and work on your education and bettering yourself. Stay away from drugs and alcohol and people who relate negatively or violently. If there is a school counselor, you might want to talk to them too about how you can work on bettering yourself, and keeping calm at home even if those around you are angry.

June 8, 2014

Your house is too violent. It sounds as though that's how you grew up.

If I were you I would lay low until you can get out and support yourself.

She shouldn't have hit you. You shouldn't have called her that word.

If you want to do better in life, and be around a better class of people than these folks who raised you, clean up your language (do not ever use that word again!), learn to solve disagreements in ways other than using violence, and work on your education and bettering yourself. Stay away from drugs and alcohol and people who relate negatively or violently. If there is a school counselor, you might want to talk to them too about how you can work on bettering yourself, and keeping calm at home even if those around you are angry.

To add onto this, see if you can find any activities you can do to be outside of the house, after school programs like sports and such, the less time you spend in that household, the better it would be for you. Do talk to a counselor or something though, they can really help in this, not just in being some kind of therapist, but also providing you with information how you can be on your own.

June 8, 2014

Without knowing this kids background and the relationship he has with his parents, I don't think anyone can determine how "violent" his family life is and that his parents are horrible people. How do you know they are not frustrated and having difficulty coping with him and his attitude towards them? He hasn't given any real details on the situation with his parents, just that they fought and it turned physical. The whole attitude surrounding kids these days and the fear of discipline is why parents are dealing with these problems now. I'm sick of hearing that its always the parents' fault when kids are disrespectful, ugly, or act out.

June 8, 2014

Without knowing this kids background and the relationship he has with his parents, I don't think anyone can determine how "violent" his family life is and that his parents are horrible people. How do you know they are not frustrated and having difficulty coping with him and his attitude towards them? He hasn't given any real details on the situation with his parents, just that they fought and it turned physical. The whole attitude surrounding kids these days and the fear of discipline is why parents are dealing with these problems now. I'm sick of hearing that its always the parents' fault when kids are disrespectful, ugly, or act out.

I'm sorry but what part of being punched in the face or having been in two fist fights with his father is not "violent"? Also, they are frustrated so they should resort to violence of swinging fist due to being unable to cope with attitude? Do you even read what you are typing, you are in essence saying:

"Oh two fights and punch in the face, I'm not sure if there is violence or not"

and

"Maybe they are stressed because this child is difficult, so they are coping, which happened to result in physical violence"

Parents lay down the ground work when it comes to respect and discipline, so yes, it does lay on the parents when a child is disrespectful, violent, or is acting out, because as a parent, you have to guide your child and put them in their place when they get out of line, just like you did with your child (which I will remember if my kid ever acts up like that in the future )

The only time I see when just acts from a kid are beyond a parent's control is when the child has a mental disability, but even in that regard, that doesn't make any type of punch to the face or fist fights anywhere near appropriate.

The point is, we can not talk to the parents here or get some kind of family intervention since the only person here is the OP, the child. All we can do is suggest ways to help their situation, to better themselves so they don't end up having more violent outburst on their side.

June 8, 2014

I'm sorry but what part of being punched in the face or having been in two fist fights with his father is not "violent"? Also, they are frustrated so they should resort to violence of swinging fist due to being unable to cope with attitude? Do you even read what you are typing, you are in essence saying:

"Oh two fights and punch in the face, I'm not sure if there is violence or not"

and

"Maybe they are stressed because this child is difficult, so they are coping, which happened to result in physical violence"

Parents lay down the ground work when it comes to respect and discipline, so yes, it does lay on the parents when a child is disrespectful, violent, or is acting out, because as a parent, you have to guide your child and put them in their place when they get out of line, just like you did with your child (which I will remember if my kid ever acts up like that in the future )

The only time I see when just acts from a kid are beyond a parent's control is when the child has a mental disability, but even in that regard, that doesn't make any type of punch to the face or fist fights anywhere near appropriate.

The point is, we can not talk to the parents here or get some kind of family intervention since the only person here is the OP, the child. All we can do is suggest ways to help their situation, to better themselves so they don't end up having more violent outburst on their side.

First of all, I'm raising FOUR children right now, okay, one of which is a teenager and was developing very much the same attitude. And I've talked to other parents who have teenaged kids who are dealing with the very same attitude this kid is projecting. One is my son's friend's father who had an incident turn physical with his 14 yr old who is 6ft and 220 lbs struck him. This kid said his father PUSHED him and he physically reacted and it turned into a fight. He called his MOTHER a stupid c**t. Yet, everyone immediately jumps on the bandwagon that his parents are the worst and he should get outta there. Why not ask him how many times he's shown his parents a little respect or appreciation?? Whats happening here is people continuously minimizing his behavior, vilifying his parents, and telling him he needs to get outta there when you don't know SQUAT about the real situation. Your taking HIS bits and pieces of information that he wants to reveal and running with it.

If I had talked to my mother in this way as a kid, she would've rocked my head back on my shoulders without a second thought and you can be damn sure I wouldn't have been waiting for no damn apology either!

Let me also add that as parents, we can lay the groundwork and TRY to make our children respectful human beings, but if they can't even SEE the fault in their own actions, you may as well be talking to a brick wall. Not all kids are going to follow the path of trying to please their parents and you can often see this in households with two children where one is never in trouble, and the other is constantly at war with their parents.

Edited June 8, 2014 by Smthn_Like_Olivia

June 8, 2014

First of all, I'm raising FOUR children right now, okay, one of which is a teenager and was developing very much the same attitude. And I've talked to other parents who have teenaged kids who are dealing with the very same attitude this kid is projecting. One is my son's friend's father who had an incident turn physical with his 14 yr old who is 6ft and 220 lbs struck him. This kid said his father PUSHED him and he physically reacted and it turned into a fight. He called his MOTHER a stupid c**t. Yet, everyone immediately jumps on the bandwagon that his parents are the worst and he should get outta there. Why not ask him how many times he's shown his parents a little respect or appreciation?? Whats happening here is people continuously minimizing his behavior, vilifying his parents, and telling him he needs to get outta there when you don't know SQUAT about the real situation. Your taking HIS bits and pieces of information that he wants to reveal and running with it.

If I had talked to my mother in this way as a kid, she would've rocked my head back on my shoulders without a second thought and you can be damn sure I wouldn't have been waiting for no damn apology either!

Let me also add that as parents, we can lay the groundwork and TRY to make our children respectful human beings, but if they can't even SEE the fault in their own actions, you may as well be talking to a brick wall. Not all kids are going to follow the path of trying to please their parents and you can often see this in households with two children where one is never in trouble, and the other is constantly at war with their parents.

You are defending child abuse. I was abused as a kid and I feel sorry for your kids.

June 8, 2014

OP, your parents are the adults and have a responsibility to act like it. And as the adults, they should show you proper ways of handling their emotions, beginning with apologizing to you. I don't think that will happen.

I agree with the others...look for help at school, and start preparing yourself for your future.

If I had talked to my mother in this way as a kid, she would've rocked my head back on my shoulders without a second thought and you can be damn sure I wouldn't have been waiting for no damn apology either!

And this is exactly how the cycle of violence is continued. Though you may or may not be physically abusive towards you children (as the OP's parents were to him), you don't seem to have a handle on how to express your emotions well (you get extremely defensive, very quickly). So what did having your "head rocked back on your shoulders" really teach you except fear of your mom? It certainly didn't seem to give you a rational way to express your anger, frustration and opinions in a calm way (based off your post in this thread).

Sorry you feel that your way is the best and only way to raise children. Thankfully, protective services and the authorities do NOT agree with you that physical violence is appropriate. Spanking may be OK. But violence...no.

There are other ways to raise children that include disciplining (not punishing...they're different things) and instructing them in the right way...not just using brute force to dominate and control them.

June 8, 2014

You are defending child abuse. I was abused as a kid and I feel sorry for your kids.

Call it what you want. I feel sorry for your lack of knowledge and quick to judgement. You don't know me or my kids, but I could let you speak to one of them and you can ask them how many times a day we exchange "I love you's". This kid isn't living in fear, he's living in a sense of entitlement. There's a difference.

June 8, 2014

OP, your parents are the adults and have a responsibility to act like it. And as the adults, they should show you proper ways of handling their emotions, beginning with apologizing to you. I don't think that will happen.

I agree with the others...look for help at school, and start preparing yourself for your future.

And this is exactly how the cycle of violence is continued. Though you may or may not be physically abusive towards you children (as the OP's parents were to him), you don't seem to have a handle on how to express your emotions well (you get extremely defensive, very quickly). So what did having your "head rocked back on your shoulders" really teach you except fear of your mom? It certainly didn't seem to give you a rational way to express your anger, frustration and opinions in a calm way (based off your post in this thread).

Sorry you feel that your way is the best and only way to raise children. Thankfully, protective services and the authorities do NOT agree with you that physical violence is appropriate. Spanking may be OK. But violence...no.

There are other ways to raise children that include disciplining (not punishing...they're different things) and instructing them in the right way...not just using brute force to dominate and control them.

Everyone's a psychiatrist. WHERE did I say his parents should beat him and what METHOD did I give that was the RIGHT WAY?? Show me where I said discipline should be physical?? If you go back and read, I said THEY needed OUTSIDE INTERVENTION, not that his parents were horrible and he should leave home. Thank you. My mom and I are as close as two people could be, and oh god forbid, yes, she spanked me as a child when I cut up. I am not one bit psychologically damaged. We talk every other day, exchange I love you's, and I am an MBA grad with a successful career.

June 8, 2014

You called your MOTHER a "stupid c***"??? I say fat lip deserved.

Condoning parental violence.

YOU have some serious issues that need to be worked out.

Blaming the minor.

The pain a mother feels when the child she has brought into the world, loved, and raised turns around and calls her a "stupid c**t" is beyond any pain you felt from that pop to the mouth.

Excusing and defending the violent actions of the mother.

This kid said his father PUSHED him and he physically reacted and it turned into a fight. He called his MOTHER a stupid c**t. Yet, everyone immediately jumps on the bandwagon that his parents are the worst and he should get outta there.

Again, blaming the minor.

If I had talked to my mother in this way as a kid, she would've rocked my head back on my shoulders without a second thought and you can be damn sure I wouldn't have been waiting for no damn apology either!

Showing appreciation for a violent reaction from your mother.

Everyone's a psychiatrist. WHERE did I say his parents should beat him and what METHOD did I give that was the RIGHT WAY?? Show me where I said discipline should be physical?

You condoned his parents' behavior many times!

June 8, 2014

Cmon, people ....get real...Unless your mother is Ronda Rousey, a swat from your mother(to a 16 year old supposedly young man) in a fit of anger ISNT abuse or violence..Its just a knee jerk reaction...

Im surprised someone hasnt recommended that he retain an attorney...

Think about this for a minute....If she told him something like "now thats not a nice thing to say to your mother, please dont do it again", Im 1000% sure he wouldnt be posting on a website about it...And ill bet hed call her a cvnt again...

What she did might not have been the most civil thing, but it made him stop and think about it. That type of disprespect isnt to be tolerated from a child...Never..

TFY

June 8, 2014

You condoned his parents' behavior many times!

I am simply saying that UNLESS you were there and KNOW the WHOLE story, then you can't be so quick to paint his parents as horrible people. QUOTE everything I said!! I stand behind it!! I'm dealing with a teenager so I know how quickly these situations can escalate out of control and a parent can lose sight.

In fact, I'll give you a classic example. The incident with my son where he almost punched me and told me F you was because I interrupted a group chat on the phone with his friends and told him to come and learn how to wash a load of clothes. He threw laundry across the livingroom and then ran out of the house cursing at me before almost punching me for grabbing his elbow. I never struck him once. I took his cell phone and computer for a month and told him he had Options A and B if he couldn't handle living under my rules. We've come a long way since then, but these teenaged attitudes can come at the drop of a hat without warning.

My son came back home only minutes later crying and apologizing for his behavior and saying he didn't know what came over him. We were able to work through it, but not all kids are like that. And as I said before, if the kid can't see any fault in the situation, then BOTH sides needs outside intervention.

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Called my mother the C word and she freaking punched me

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