Wisecrack Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 She is my best friend (I'm a guy). We're platonic. We both have people we are interested in and have both been working to wingman the other at parties etc. Yet last night was the first party we could make things happen. The guy she was interested in was at the party (one of my close friends). The girl I wanted was not. So I spent the night trying to get those two together but I'm confused why she didn't put any effort herself or try anything. I am even more confused by how she was to me the whole night. Very regularly she would come past and lay her head on my shoulder, grab me or hover around me. Half the night she spent sitting on my lap as we chatted getting really cosy. We ended the night early and she later messaged me having go at me for trying to get her with her dream guy. She has a lot of guy friends and even more guys that blow up her phone so she is not short on attention. Why did my wingman'ing skills fail? Why did she act like a girl marking her territory on me basically?
irresolute Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 I don't know. Maybe she's into you? what do you think? 2
marcjb Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 We're platonic. Are you sure? We all know how these things usually turn out... 1
LustAppeal Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 ... Dude, she's attracted to you. Ever have a friend with benefits? Works for a week or so, after that you become intimate on more than just a sexual level... It seems like the same thing is happening here. Just without the sex.
Author Wisecrack Posted June 7, 2014 Author Posted June 7, 2014 But she peppers our messages with 'mate' and 'buddy'? Not to mention her phone blows up with guys messaging her although she says they are all just friends. And surely I am one of them when we are replying to each other every half hour 24/7. Heck, she kept mentioning that guys name all night! Then she had a go at me for trying to set her up with him and telling me how he was out of her league. But it's not that; it's the basically her being 'all over me' as the word is now getting around, that is annoying as it basically stopped me from mingling with the other girls at the party.
todreaminblue Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 But she peppers our messages with 'mate' and 'buddy'? Not to mention her phone blows up with guys messaging her although she says they are all just friends. And surely I am one of them when we are replying to each other every half hour 24/7. Heck, she kept mentioning that guys name all night! Then she had a go at me for trying to set her up with him and telling me how he was out of her league. But it's not that; it's the basically her being 'all over me' as the word is now getting around, that is annoying as it basically stopped me from mingling with the other girls at the party. Let her know the physical contact is not what you want from the friendship be clear and concise with that.deb 1
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 So basically the story goes.. You both are best friends you have feelings for each other.. This 'wing man' business is nothing more than acting.. She clearly wants more from you & the fact you went to the extent of questioning this to the public would indicate that you like her too... Starting as friends make the best relationships x
Author Wisecrack Posted June 7, 2014 Author Posted June 7, 2014 So basically the story goes.. You both are best friends you have feelings for each other.. This 'wing man' business is nothing more than acting.. She clearly wants more from you & the fact you went to the extent of questioning this to the public would indicate that you like her too... Starting as friends make the best relationships x Well she did spend the night checking who I was messaging too and I have a feeling had we actually made it out into town that night and adding alcohol and loud music... But I am interested in her close friend though and she knows that which is good that we did not make it out and I looked after her that night til she got picked up. I use to have feelings for her but I am not sure about them anymore. She stopped messaging me today and it feels wierd as we always do. I have a feeling the rumors have gotten out how much she had drank that night and how she was all over me. So surely this distancing is a clear sign she is not interested in me?
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 Lol sorry but u do like her.. Go &get it sorted with her.. What's the worse that can happen x
irresolute Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 You really asking us if she's into you or not? I guess she might not be interested if you don't see signals and you need us to tell for you. If she has lots of male friends chances are you are one more of them. Can't really tell though. Are you cute? Are you interesting? If yes, there's some chance still.
stillafool Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 Well she did spend the night checking who I was messaging too and I have a feeling had we actually made it out into town that night and adding alcohol and loud music... But I am interested in her close friend though and she knows that which is good that we did not make it out and I looked after her that night til she got picked up. I use to have feelings for her but I am not sure about them anymore. She stopped messaging me today and it feels wierd as we always do. I have a feeling the rumors have gotten out how much she had drank that night and how she was all over me. So surely this distancing is a clear sign she is not interested in me? She's in competition with her friend. She is probably jealous that you are now interested in her friend. Let her know that you are still very much interested in dating her friend. I don't think you should go out with her alone anymore because she acts inappropriate. 1
phineas Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 Either bang her or tell her to keep her hands to herself. There are boundaries opposite sex friends must adhere to or it gets weird. Mostly To everyone else looking on. If I'm talking to a chick and she hops on her guy "friend"s lap and puts her head on his shoulder I assume she isn't interested in me at best and banging him at worst so I forget about her. 1
Author Wisecrack Posted June 8, 2014 Author Posted June 8, 2014 So to throw something in the bag, apparently I drunkenly promised to take her to a Ball a few months down the track regardless of whom I might be seeing. It was because she told me the story of how a guy ditched her at her highschool prom. Apparently she has been telling a few people and it's gotten back to me now. I am not sure how to take this?
stillafool Posted June 8, 2014 Posted June 8, 2014 Why doesn't she ask the guy she's interested in to the Prom? Tell her you want to take her friend to the Prom.
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