DrOMFS Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 So I met this girl for drinks on Wednesday (I'm 27 shes 25). Met her on POF. She actually messaged me (I was planning on doing it that night!). We met up a few hours after! Long story short, she's amazing, pretty, smart and fun. Dinner by the beach, then walked on the pier, watched the sun set, once it cleared out we made out for a long while. I don't want to meet anyone else. Oh this first date lasted 7 hours! I'm the type of guy that only dates 1 girl at a time, until I know whether its right I want to focus on getting to know one person once I see that spark. I'm looking for a partner in life, i don't care about dating to score etc We texted briefly last night and she said she would have to check if she was working on saturday. Should I show more interest and call and ask if she's free (again). Or should I just wait for her to text me I want to call but my gut says don't seem too eager Sorry i meant to keep that brief
guest572 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 I think you should wait. You have already asked her out, you don't want to harass her! Sounds like a very nice date. Good luck and hope she calls soon!
DArtagnan2 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 I would wait as well. She knows you want to do something Saturday and I would suspect by tonight, she should have been able to check her schedule. If you don't hear from her by tomorrow mid-day, then its not really a question of whether you write/call and ask or let it go, because all she had to do was let you know she was working. If she doesn't, then I would suspect she doesn't want to go out Saturday night. I hope you hear from her.
J21 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 Wait it out and slow down, what's the rush? Nothing worse than killing any interest she may have for you by being overly eager and appearing desperate. You've already expressed interest in doing something Sat, since she said she needs to check her schedule, give her some room. Meeting weds, then again Saturday seems pretty quick. But I do hope you hear from her and everything works out.
nadine5 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 Don't play games, dude. Just call her. She will be so excited to hear from you, especially after having a 7 hour date! Also, girls hate games. Games were invented because guys like games; girls hate them. So f***cking call her right now. I'm serious. You are going to call her before you read the end of this post. 5 4 3 2 1 OK, dial the number.
nadine5 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 I disagree with you guys. It was Wednesday. It's Friday now. That's plenty of time. No one has to follow The Rules all the time.
guest572 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 I guess my view is not to treat it like a game, but it sounds like she may be uninterested or indecisive at this point. Sure, if you want to, pressure her, call her and ask again. I dont think its a good idea to pressure someone into seeing you again.
Author DrOMFS Posted June 6, 2014 Author Posted June 6, 2014 I disagree with you guys. It was Wednesday. It's Friday now. That's plenty of time. No one has to follow The Rules all the time. I like your thinking haha! I've never been so excited about someone. I figured that spending the entire evening together until 12:30 at night, she could have run at any time! I hate games, why can't people just be honest and say hey I like you you like me, lets not keep eachother wondering
Author DrOMFS Posted June 6, 2014 Author Posted June 6, 2014 I think you should wait. You have already asked her out, you don't want to harass her! Sounds like a very nice date. Good luck and hope she calls soon! I would wait as well. She knows you want to do something Saturday and I would suspect by tonight, she should have been able to check her schedule. If you don't hear from her by tomorrow mid-day, then its not really a question of whether you write/call and ask or let it go, because all she had to do was let you know she was working. If she doesn't, then I would suspect she doesn't want to go out Saturday night. I hope you hear from her. Thanks guys, I know this is probably right. I'm considering just waiting until like 10ish?? Maybe a good compromise to waiting haha Never felt this enthusiastic about someone before
J21 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 (edited) It's not games. It's called giving someone you met once some space. No need to breath down her neck when she said she'll check if she has to work on Saturday. She got the message the first time when you asked her out. If you wanna repeat yourself and sound like a eager and broken record because "you dont play any games" then go right ahead. I like your thinking haha! I've never been so excited about someone. I figured that spending the entire evening together until 12:30 at night, she could have run at any time! I hate games, why can't people just be honest and say hey I like you you like me, lets not keep eachother wondering Sorry to break it to you, but your excitement in her doesn't matter much. It's her interest in you that's gonna decide if she's giving you another date or not. I am hoping she is just as into you as you are. Edited June 6, 2014 by J21 2
Author DrOMFS Posted June 6, 2014 Author Posted June 6, 2014 It's not games. It's called giving someone you met once some space. No need to breath down her neck when she said she'll check if they have to work on Saturday. She got the message the first time when you asked her out. If you wanna repeat yourself and sound like a eager and broken record because "you dont play any games" then go right ahead. Sorry to break it to you, but your excitement in her doesn't matter much. It's her interest in you that's gonna decide if she's giving you another date or not. Spot on advice I mean the way it was left was she would check and let me know, then we talked about some other stuff and said goodnight now if i don't call then i'm playing the game of acting not interested// busy with life etc if i call I look needy/ clingy etc no winning with women...idk im so confused lol
irresolute Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 7 hours?? Really??? Message her and the same day had the date?? you sound kind of desperate and you'll scare her away. Try to find anything interesting to do... And the fact that you're actually asking for advice here says a lot about you.
Rar0 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 7 hours?? Really??? Message her and the same day had the date?? you sound kind of desperate and you'll scare her away. Try to find anything interesting to do... And the fact that you're actually asking for advice here says a lot about you. What's desperate?
irresolute Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 this guy seems desperate. He messaged the girl and had the date that same night (aka: both had nothing else to do in their lives), then the date lasted 7 hours (aka: they still have nothing to do! Are they unemployed?), and then he messages her, and the cherry the cake, he comes to post here asking for advice. Evidently this guy is desperate or his life is very boring... that scares girls out.
Author DrOMFS Posted June 6, 2014 Author Posted June 6, 2014 What's desperate? lol idk what that guys talking about. She messaged me, I suggested the next day, she said you're going to make me wait!? So we met for dinner and it just lasted a long time I'm going to call her around 9-930 if i don't hear and just ask if she wants to make plans again. At least I'll know one way or the other, hate wondering. 1
Author DrOMFS Posted June 7, 2014 Author Posted June 7, 2014 9.30 PM on Friday or ..? ya I called, left a message saying I enjoyed the time we spent together and hoped she'd want to do it again, and to give me a call. Went on pof and saw she was online, so...ya guess it's NEXT UP! Not really sure what happened. I mean 7 hour date? Passionate at the end, I mean I kissed her and she frenched me... Went from ecstatic to a little down about this one. I mean a lot of other pretty girls are out there, but I liked this one. Such is life Thanks everyone, at least now I have an answer
J21 Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 ya I called, left a message saying I enjoyed the time we spent together and hoped she'd want to do it again, and to give me a call. Went on pof and saw she was online, so...ya guess it's NEXT UP! Not really sure what happened. I mean 7 hour date? Passionate at the end, I mean I kissed her and she frenched me... Went from ecstatic to a little down about this one. I mean a lot of other pretty girls are out there, but I liked this one. Such is life Thanks everyone, at least now I have an answer Sorry to hear it dude. Cheers and onto the next. 1
guest572 Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 Ah sorry to hear it explains why she was hesitant to respond. She doesn't want to rule you out just yet. Or she is just too chicken to respond with a no. 1
myothernic2 Posted June 7, 2014 Posted June 7, 2014 ya I called, left a message saying I enjoyed the time we spent together and hoped she'd want to do it again, and to give me a call. Went on pof and saw she was online, so...ya guess it's NEXT UP! Not really sure what happened. I mean 7 hour date? Passionate at the end, I mean I kissed her and she frenched me... Went from ecstatic to a little down about this one. I mean a lot of other pretty girls are out there, but I liked this one. Such is life Thanks everyone, at least now I have an answer Sorry to hear that. At least you're taking it in stride. 1
Author DrOMFS Posted June 12, 2014 Author Posted June 12, 2014 To me, it sounds like he is very interested in this girl, and that's it. I find it interesting that when a guy acts like he's interested in a girl, people call him desperate. Thanks, 27 y/o Dr. I'm not exactly desperate for women...just looking for the right one. Quick question, she texted me back a few days later, said she got into an argument with her best friend from back home, still have feeling for eachother yada etc Told her "Sorry to hear that, keep my number and let me know when you're ready and we'll have another first date if we're both single" She replied sounds good Haven't texted her since, figure if she wants me she'll come get it. Been 4 days. Continue No Contact or maybe a single text over the weekend?? hmmm, never been rejected after a date before haha
J21 Posted June 13, 2014 Posted June 13, 2014 (edited) Thanks, 27 y/o Dr. I'm not exactly desperate for women...just looking for the right one. Quick question, she texted me back a few days later, said she got into an argument with her best friend from back home, still have feeling for eachother yada etc Told her "Sorry to hear that, keep my number and let me know when you're ready and we'll have another first date if we're both single" She replied sounds good Haven't texted her since, figure if she wants me she'll come get it. Been 4 days. Continue No Contact or maybe a single text over the weekend?? hmmm, never been rejected after a date before haha The whole text sounded like it was filled with attitude to be honest. Don't think you are salvaging this. Furthermore, you would look pretty desperate if you reached out after telling her to "let me know when you're ready". The "if we're both single part" sounded like you're some limited time offer, I'm sure she wasn't impressed. The "sounds good" response was a "whatever" Forget this one man, no way you can initiate contact and come away without looking desperate. On to the next. Edited June 13, 2014 by J21
Author DrOMFS Posted June 13, 2014 Author Posted June 13, 2014 The whole text sounded like it was filled with attitude to be honest. Don't think you are salvaging this. Furthermore, you would look pretty desperate if you reached out after telling her to "let me know when you're ready". The "if we're both single part" sounded like you're some limited time offer, I'm sure she wasn't impressed. The "sounds good" response was a "whatever" Forget this one man, no way you can initiate contact and come away without looking desperate. On to the next. Ya I paraphrased mostly, said she was the best gal i've met, it didn't come across w/ attitude, but rather, if you're single and I am we'll try again her: 'sounds good thanks' is definitely a w/e tho Exactly, if i text her a 'how are you feeling' now I look weak. But should I care? If a girl likes a boy, they'll move heaven to talk to the guy. So really, in the end I have nothing to lose by saying Hi. Girl is a dead end. The girl i met the other day turned out to be a dancer...can't win lol Seriously so much easier meeting women at a bar in person.
J21 Posted June 13, 2014 Posted June 13, 2014 (edited) Exactly, if i text her a 'how are you feeling' now I look weak. But should I care? If a girl likes a boy, they'll move heaven to talk to the guy. So really, in the end I have nothing to lose by saying Hi. Girl is a dead end. . Moving heaven to talk to you seems a bit exaggerating considering you reached out to her twice and even asked her out. 1) You asked her out and she said she'd check if she had to work on Saturday. Ended up never getting back to you. 2) You called and left a voicemail, she never returned your call. she was also back on POF. Whether she had an argument with a best friend or not, how does that affect getting back to you after reaching out twice? If she truly cared she could've called/texted to explain something came up and reschedule. You are drunk off the first date and refuse to rationalize her interest in you has fled. If you want to go for a hail mary pass go for it, but the signs are all there man. You just don't wanna believe them. So really, in the end I have nothing to lose by saying Hi. Girl is a dead end. . Nothing to lose? You'll lose her respect because you come off desperate. Also, might lose a bit of pride and bruise your ego. Edited June 13, 2014 by J21
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