GreatDadAlways Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 I need some advice folks. My 2 1/2 year divorce was final a couple weeks back. She walked away with 60% of my income and I still pay for all the extra curriculars ($6-8k more per year) for two children. I also have one in college and pay car insurance, books, and provide $200 a month in spending money. So today the college student asks if I can buy a new phone. I asked her mother if this was her idea and she said yes and "She provides plenty a house, food, clothes, etc." Now given the fact that the ex gets the majority of my income and I have two others to pay extra curriculars for ... I'm stunned. She actually acts as though she is the provider when she works a part time job for $10/hour. This stirs anger in me beyond belief. I simply have no money left after paying rent and food. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you deal with the anger or address the ex who appreciates nothing?
beach Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 Your kids will figure it out as time moves along. The kid wants a new phone? Make her get a summer job and buy it herself! It's not your job to GIVE your adult child everything they want! It's the child's responsibility to earn her own money and buy the things she/he may want/need. You can't control your exW. But saying no to your child will help them learn to grow up and care for themself. Saying no puts the responsibility where it belongs...on the child.
Author GreatDadAlways Posted June 5, 2014 Author Posted June 5, 2014 I agree and that's the direction we went. Of course her mother told her I wouldn't pay becuase I don't care about her. Convenient how she doesn't say "I put the screws to your dad and made him a poor bastard". btw, my daughter is working two jobs and saving for her college housing. No concerns there, she has my work ethic :-)
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