Mark1 Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 we've been getting along really well, we tease each other and help each other with class work etc. "Hey let me get your number, i might have some questions about the lab we have for hmwk" "uhh okay…" "for educational purposes ONLY of course" - i said sarcastically" "yeah it better be for education purposes only, my boyfriend will kill me. he's like, crazy and controlling" "ha, sounds like he has some confidence issues" what is this controlling crazy bf thing all about?
marcjb Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 You know that you asked her for her number for reasons besides school. Why are you trying to get involved with someone that's not single? 4
PegNosePete Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 She has a BF. Who cares what he's like? Red light, black card, stop. 5
d0nnivain Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 She has a BF. Any romantic designs you may have on her are a NO GO. If you do have a class Q, call. If you want to flirt, talk to somebody else. this girl is not available. Even if the BF is fake, her mentioning a BF is a kind way of communicating to you that she has no romantic interest in you. Next. 5
Author Mark1 Posted June 5, 2014 Author Posted June 5, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? 1
marcjb Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? Really? What is going to happen if it works, and you manage to "steal" her from her boyfriend, then she ends up leaving you for another guy. If she can leave her boyfriend for you, she will leave you for another guy just as easily. 2
ThatMan Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? See? That might be your first problem. Women can tell that you're a scumbag. Things might work out better for you if you got that attitude in check and looked elsewhere. 4
WrinkledForehead Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? Oh, goodness. :/ Girls are not goals, and emotions are not balls you kick around. Infidelity is considered a wrong course of action for a reason. Even if one chooses to disregard the moral aspect, she gave you a statement which clearly indicates she is not available for a dating relationship with you. As a PP said, going against that is disrespecting her relationship and will most likely serve only to irritate her. 4
Charmander Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 So yeah... I've done this. Not proud of it in the least. She left me the same way I got her... Do not pursue, don't be foolish. The knight in shining armor isn't worth a damn. Stop trying to save princesses. 1
ThatMan Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 The thing is that most people can size you up in five seconds to determine whether or not you objectify women like that. People can recognize it in how you carry yourself, what you say, and how you puff out a certain less than attractive air. If you had a moment of sincerity and was interested in a woman because who she actually is as a person then you'll probably get somewhere. Instead you're being indirect because you can only see a goal and that's very off-putting. 1
Frank2thepoint Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? I can't believe you don't have a little voice in your head that says "this is wrong". Of course, eventually you'll turn that phrase into "A husband isn't a reason not to pursue". You're on your way to becoming a pariah. 1
DitzyPanda Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 First of all it sounds like she's not interested. Whether her "bf" is real or not, just mentioning that should tell you to stop. Be friends with the girl. If the bf is as you described then you can wait till they've broken up and swoop. TBH my current gf chose me over her ex. I did all I could as a good friend to help them stay together, but when she started paying more attention to me than him I took my opportunity. So maybe she'll grow to like you if you just stay friends. That's the best way to a woman's heart. 1
GemmaUK Posted June 5, 2014 Posted June 5, 2014 She is aware you may well be interested and is warning you off any such behaviour. Respect it. Leave her be.
PegNosePete Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? If you see a nice banana tree on the other side of a a river, do you still try to swim across even though it's full of killer piranhas that will eat you alive in 5 seconds flat? Play with fire, you're gonna get burned. Good luck. 2
Spectre Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 A boyfriend isn't a reason not to pursue. Do you not try to shoot at goal just because there is a goalie there? It totally is a reason, and it's one for you too. Why would you even WANT to get with a girl who lets other dudes "pursue" her while she has a bf? 1
SoleMate Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 Couldn't disagree more with this line of thinking. A casual bf/gf situation is far less serious and worthy of hands-off respect than marriage, by its very nature. It's fine to pursue someone who is in a casual ad hoc situation. 1
Spectre Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 Umm, if they are casual, but exclusive? Yeah, you stay the hell away. Go find someone single, it's not hard. 1
Moe'sTavern Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 Apparently the OP thinks this will work out like some romantic comedy. Not very likely. 1
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