LoveFloats Posted June 2, 2014 Posted June 2, 2014 I went on an amazing first date yesterday, and think we totally hit it off! He's everything i'm looking for..but scared to get too excited yet. It's only been abou 24hrs since, but i haven't heard from him yet. Is it ok for the girl to text first? Or should I wait to hear from him??
d0nnivain Posted June 2, 2014 Posted June 2, 2014 There are no rules any more. If you had fun, let him know. If you sit there waiting for him to reach out, he may mistakenly conclude that you are not into him. N.B. When I say reach out -- I mean one text, call or email not a barrage of them. 4
LustAppeal Posted June 2, 2014 Posted June 2, 2014 TTTEEEEXXXXXTTTTT HHHHHIIIIIMMMMMM!!!!!! If you liked the date that much try and shoot for date number 2. I personally don't know anyone who finds it unattractive for the girl to text first, I find it kind of sexy actually. The one mistake people have now days is building a relationship around texting, messaging, or phoning. They go all week texting each other back and forth, and when it comes time to do the second or third date the only thing they have left to talk about is how the day went, how the evening is going, and so on. I'm not saying that texting doesn't work when it comes to getting to know someone, but it takes allot of the value/passion out of dating. Good luck with it though!!!!!
jbelle6 Posted June 2, 2014 Posted June 2, 2014 I think it would be appropriate to thank him for the date. 3
Author LoveFloats Posted June 2, 2014 Author Posted June 2, 2014 Ok, text sent, now I wait THanks guys!! 2
Author LoveFloats Posted June 3, 2014 Author Posted June 3, 2014 So I text him 4-5 hours ago with no response am I freaking out for nothing?
J21 Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 So I text him 4-5 hours ago with no response am I freaking out for nothing? Depends on what you said? Hopefully you weren't overly gushy.
Author LoveFloats Posted June 3, 2014 Author Posted June 3, 2014 All I said was 'hi _____! Just wanted to let you know I had a great time with you yesterday. Hope we can do it again soon ' 2
mammasita Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 When I was going on dates, whenever I had a great date and I felt like we hit it off, I always sent a text as I was driving away (not literally while driving lol) "thank you for the drinks, I had a great time"....or anything along those lines. Opens the lines of communication and IMO put the ball back in his court to set up another date. No rules, do what you feel.
marcjb Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 All I said was 'hi _____! Just wanted to let you know I had a great time with you yesterday. Hope we can do it again soon ' That was fine, as mentioned the ball is in his court now. 1
FitChick Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 If a guy really likes you, he will lock in the next date while on the first date. Because you haven't heard from him he is probably keeping his options open or not interested. Regardless, you should always thank a man. It's just good manners. 1
FitChick Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 When I say reach out -- I mean one text, call or email. That's why I hate that Dr. Phil-ism "reach out." Reaching out means grabbing someone. Otherwise you are calling, emailing, texting. Quite a big difference, no? I also blame Dr. Phil for making problems into "issues." (cringe) Hate pop psychobabble!
Author LoveFloats Posted June 3, 2014 Author Posted June 3, 2014 At the end of the date we hugged and i said we should do it again and he said yes, and to keep in touch. Throughout the date he was talking about things we could do..asked what my schedule was like this week etc. So confused, and feeling really dissapointed right now
Lipitor11 Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 Hopefully he'll get in contact with you. Maybe you should call him by the end of the week, I mean, he did drop hints that he wanted to see you again.
guest572 Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 I've been on a great date where we planned future dates during the first date. Never saw him again. Don't worry, just wait and see. 1
Author LoveFloats Posted June 3, 2014 Author Posted June 3, 2014 So I heard back from him and all he said was ‘Hi! Yes I had fun too. We should do it again.’ But he didn’t make any suggestions etc, and I haven’t responded to that. Should I make that move or wait for him?
d0nnivain Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 He's taking his time. At this point, all you know is he's polite -- he responded to your text. Since you want to go out again, I see no problem with you calling him to arrange another date at your expense (asker pays). Otherwise your only choice is to wait. I'm not that passive.
Mrin Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 He's taking his time. At this point, all you know is he's polite -- he responded to your text. Since you want to go out again, I see no problem with you calling him to arrange another date at your expense (asker pays). I agree. Is there a band in town you want to see? A gallery opening? A play? Concert in the park. I'd react favorably to a woman who called me with a specific event in mind. Aside from showing confidence, it also shows that you're not afraid to speak up for something you want. Additionally, it gives him insight into the things you like to do - thus making his future date ideas all the mo' betta!
Author LoveFloats Posted June 3, 2014 Author Posted June 3, 2014 Thanks guys. I’ve never been able to play by the stupid dating rules, and don’t really want to be with someone who plays games anyways. I sent a text saying to let me know when he might be free. So now it is up to him! If I don’t hear than obv I know he’s not all that into me..
d0nnivain Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 Thanks guys. I’ve never been able to play by the stupid dating rules, and don’t really want to be with someone who plays games anyways. I sent a text saying to let me know when he might be free. So now it is up to him! If I don’t hear than obv I know he’s not all that into me.. No. I said call him. Texting him to ask when he's free is not calling and asking him to engage in a particular activity at a specified time with you --- to wit a date. When are you free? . . . is vague. Would you like to go to the movies with me on Friday at 7 o'clock my treat? is how you ask for a date. Texting is for quick notes -- thanks, I'm running late. Please get milk etc. It's not for starting a relationship. Put on your big girl panties & call him. Even if he declines your invitation, you will feel so proud of yourself for taking control. 2
sillyanswer Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 If a guy really likes you, he will lock in the next date while on the first date. Sometimes guys forget to do this. I speak from first hand experience.
TheBladeRunner Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 No. I said call him. Texting him to ask when he's free is not calling and asking him to engage in a particular activity at a specified time with you --- to wit a date. When are you free? . . . is vague. Would you like to go to the movies with me on Friday at 7 o'clock my treat? is how you ask for a date. Texting is for quick notes -- thanks, I'm running late. Please get milk etc. It's not for starting a relationship. Put on your big girl panties & call him. Even if he declines your invitation, you will feel so proud of yourself for taking control. Not sure how old you are OP, but at my age I would LOVE for a woman to just pick up the stinking phone and call me. One of my biggest turn offs is woman in my age bracket want to communicate with text. Texting can be fun to do while slacking off a little at work AFTER you establish some sort of relationship. and Like d0nnivain said "it's fine for quick notes". I feel that with texting we lose a lot of the emotion in the text itself. Maybe I am just "some old guy", but I would much rather hear a voice. Then I can tell she had a good time. Recently wound up on my FaceBook page and it makes a lot of sense regarding how we are with our phones and gadgets.......it's worth a look-see . 1
Author LoveFloats Posted June 3, 2014 Author Posted June 3, 2014 I'm not sure..if he hasn't suggested anything by now, I feel as though I would be bugging him to hang out again way too early, and scare him away lol. 1
J21 Posted June 3, 2014 Posted June 3, 2014 I think texting is fine, sometimes they don't pick up, and then it ends up being telephone tag. Do you call again? Do you wait til he calls? At least through text you can choose your words carefully. Just pick be specific with a Time/Date/Activity, you're already asking him out, might as well be more clear on the plans rather than putting it back on his lap.
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