I just got dumped via text message

[ponchsox]

Dated a girl for two months. I'm 37 and she's 29. She was separated and claims she was finalizing her divorce when we started dating. (lie?)We were spending a couple days per week together. I liked her, but didn't feel like she was LTR material. Things were going well just dating and she recently brought me to meet her family. She came for dinner to meet my family last night. We had plans to hang out last night and today but yesterday she changed them and said she wanted to go out with friends last night and didn't invite me. So I texts her today and her response was "this relationship isn't working. I've already moved on from this. Please don't contact me again. I'd appreciate it. Good luck.

 

Really? What is wrong with people? I'm done with this ****.

[elseaacych]

Rude.

 

But, really, if you knew she wasn't LTR material, does it even really matter? Time to move on.

[Raena]

My ex did the same to me... dumped me via text message. Some people just don't have the balls to talk to you to your face. For me it was 11 years together. Pretty crappy way to end something that lasted that long!

 

You said you weren't feeling it with her anyway, so maybe she sensed that. Either way I agree with you, it was a terrible way to end things.

 

I had a friend once who found he was being dumped when she changed her facebook status. Didn't even talk to him about it, just changed her status and wouldn't talk to him again. Some people... I swear!

[Keenly]

Well how nice of her to tell you that she had already moved on before she broke up with you.

 

 

She's a whore, plain and simple.

[jbelle6]

Damn, she couldn't even call? Classy.

Well, you didn't want a relationship with her anyways so no loss. Still was tacky of her though.

[Chi townD]

Wow! that was pretty harsh! Forget her. You don't need anyone that can treat you so coldly in your life.

 

Please tell me you didn't respond to that BS. Did you?

[ponchsox]

Wow! that was pretty harsh! Forget her. You don't need anyone that can treat you so coldly in your life.

 

Please tell me you didn't respond to that BS. Did you?

 

I called her a coward and told her to give her next bf the respect to tell him in person.

[CarrieT]

Dated a girl for two months. I'm 37 and she's 29.

Different era.

 

Many people in their twenties believe it is acceptable to communicate with others in this method.

 

Sad, but true.

[soccerrprp]

This is an interesting post. Dating for 2-months and people think that they deserve a form of break-up that they think they deserve. No. You don't DESERVE anything less than a text break-up. You may not like it and think it cowardly, rude, but she at least communicated that she didn't want to see you instead of disappearing.

 

YOU also didn't think she was LTR material, so, what is the real issue here? Did you come to this conclusion before she dumped you or before? I was dumped by a woman via email. I thought it crazy at first, then thought, well, knowing her, being adverse to confrontation and the crazy emotions that come with speaking to someone over the phone or never mind, in person, I understood.

 

Why do you think you DESERVE a phone call or a person to person? It sucks, but it's another "embraced" and "accepted" form of communication.

[ponchsox]

Rude.

 

But, really, if you knew she wasn't LTR material, does it even really matter? Time to move on.

 

It doesn't. I'm not hurt. I'm just appalled by the text. She got what she wanted, two months of sex and wining & dining and she bailed when the new car smell wore off.

[soccerrprp]

It doesn't. I'm not hurt. I'm just appalled by the text. She got what she wanted, two months of sex and wining & dining and she bailed when the new car smell wore off.

 

She sounds like the "more" typical male player.

[FortunateSon]

Although incredibly harsh and rude, she is clearly doing you a favor in the long run!! As you mentioned, by her actions she doesn't seem like good LTR material.

[Allumere]

This is an interesting post. Dating for 2-months and people think that they deserve a form of break-up that they think they deserve. No. You don't DESERVE anything less than a text break-up. You may not like it and think it cowardly, rude, but she at least communicated that she didn't want to see you instead of disappearing.

 

YOU also didn't think she was LTR material, so, what is the real issue here? Did you come to this conclusion before she dumped you or before? I was dumped by a woman via email. I thought it crazy at first, then thought, well, knowing her, being adverse to confrontation and the crazy emotions that come with speaking to someone over the phone or never mind, in person, I understood.

 

Why do you think you DESERVE a phone call or a person to person? It sucks, but it's another "embraced" and "accepted" form of communication.

 

I couldn't disagree more. Is there a brownie point for not disappearing? Ok, I can grasp that but I personally find breaking up via text to be incredibly disrespectful. Yes, it is a common means of communications these days...I certainly text but to end a dating relationship that way devalues everything. Even if a LTR wasn't something either could see they spent time together, were intimate, met family and share experiences together...so now something that was a good/pleasant experience that had run its course now becomes tainted and feels fraudulent, wasteful. I don't know, maybe its my age but I think technology has aided more to the disposable mentality in dating (and other things) then anything else because people no longer have to man up. Maybe if folks knew they couldn't rely on these things there would be more thought about dating,entering relationships and talking through things then the current revolving doors we see today.

[ponchsox]

I couldn't disagree more. Is there a brownie point for not disappearing? Ok, I can grasp that but I personally find breaking up via text to be incredibly disrespectful. Yes, it is a common means of communications these days...I certainly text but to end a dating relationship that way devalues everything. Even if a LTR wasn't something either could see they spent time together, were intimate, met family and share experiences together...so now something that was a good/pleasant experience that had run its course now becomes tainted and feels fraudulent, wasteful. I don't know, maybe its my age but I think technology has aided more to the disposable mentality in dating (and other things) then anything else because people no longer have to man up. Maybe if folks knew they couldn't rely on these things there would be more thought about dating,entering relationships and talking through things then the current revolving doors we see today.

 

Exactly. People don't have to face the consequences when they leave a text message. They can block you from calling, texting, and from facebook leaving you no explanation and a feeling that you were just played. To me, this speaks volumes about her true character and I'm glad she ended it now as I have zero respect for someone like this.

[BC1980]

Exactly. People don't have to face the consequences when they leave a text message. They can block you from calling, texting, and from facebook leaving you no explanation and a feeling that you were just played. To me, this speaks volumes about her true character and I'm glad she ended it now as I have zero respect for someone like this.

 

It's sad, but I've come to expect so little from people the older I get.

[veggirl]

that is one bitchy ass text message. if you were exclusive/official, a text break up is NOT appropriate. what a nasty way to handle it on her end.

 

You probably shouldn't date "separated" people though. all separated means imo is "still married". people who aren't even officially divorced aren't ready to date, I'm sure this girl was full of issues.

[soccerrprp]

I couldn't disagree more. Is there a brownie point for not disappearing? Ok, I can grasp that but I personally find breaking up via text to be incredibly disrespectful. Yes, it is a common means of communications these days...I certainly text but to end a dating relationship that way devalues everything. Even if a LTR wasn't something either could see they spent time together, were intimate, met family and share experiences together...so now something that was a good/pleasant experience that had run its course now becomes tainted and feels fraudulent, wasteful. I don't know, maybe its my age but I think technology has aided more to the disposable mentality in dating (and other things) then anything else because people no longer have to man up. Maybe if folks knew they couldn't rely on these things there would be more thought about dating,entering relationships and talking through things then the current revolving doors we see today.

 

I am not disagreeing with you on most of your points. It is very wanting and crappy to be dumped via text, but no one DESERVES any form of rejection other than the one given by the dumper. Why should you? You would like to have a face to face or phone call, but the dumper has his/her own comfort level to consider. I'm being real, that's all. I may want and think that I deserve better, but that doesn't mean that I DO DESERVE any such form of communication that has been given....I say this w/o hesitation vastly b/c of two things in this case:

 

1. Only dating for 2-months

2. The OP didn't see this woman as LTR material and may well have been thinking of dumping her after he had his fill of her

 

There was nothing lasting, serious, committed about this fledgling relationship. I would never text a break-up. Or email, but I do understand why some people would use texting as another communication form to do so.

[ponchsox]

I am not disagreeing with you on most of your points. It is very wanting and crappy to be dumped via text, but no one DESERVES any form of rejection other than the one given by the dumper. Why should you? You would like to have a face to face or phone call, but the dumper has his/her own comfort level to consider. I'm being real, that's all. I may want and think that I deserve better, but that doesn't mean that I DO DESERVE any such form of communication that has been given....I say this w/o hesitation vastly b/c of two things in this case:

 

1. Only dating for 2-months

2. The OP didn't see this woman as LTR material and may well have been thinking of dumping her after he had his fill of her

 

There was nothing lasting, serious, committed about this fledgling relationship. I would never text a break-up. Or email, but I do understand why some people would use texting as another communication form to do so.

 

The hammer was coming from me soon. She saw the writing on the wall. Maybe she felt better doing it first.

[KaliLove]

Maybe she realized you were just stringing her along and she was pissed off about it and didn't feel like dealing with you. It's classless to dump someone over text, but it's also mean to string someone along when you know you don't want to be with them long term unless they are aware of that.

[writergal]

Maybe she realized you were just stringing her along and she was pissed off about it and didn't feel like dealing with you. It's classless to dump someone over text, but it's also mean to string someone along when you know you don't want to be with them long term unless they are aware of that.

 

Totally agree with you on that.

[lastking]

Wow...you have quite the standards in the way you react.

 

I can understand why she sent a text.

 

 

@Eau Claire - You seem to be in a bad mood today. All your messages are negative . Lets give positive advice instead of bringing down the OP

[Simon Phoenix]

I used to care about these things, but let's face it -- there's no good way to be dumped. Except for the extremely rare mutual breakup, no one ever says "Even though you broke my heart, the way you dumped me was awesome!" And in this case, it doesn't even sound like the OP really even liked her that much, so I'm not sure why he's so angry. Maybe he wanted to be the one to dump and was pissed that he didn't get the chance? I don't know.

 

I've been dumped in several ways. I can't really say one made me feel better than the other.

[writergal]

I used to care about these things, but let's face it -- there's no good way to be dumped. Except for the extremely rare mutual breakup, no one ever says "Even though you broke my heart, the way you dumped me was awesome!" And in this case, it doesn't even sound like the OP really even liked her that much, so I'm not sure why he's so angry. Maybe he wanted to be the one to dump and was pissed that he didn't get the chance? I don't know.

 

I've been dumped in several ways. I can't really say one made me feel better than the other.

 

Hahaha! Definitely my favorite post in this thread!!

[bubbaganoosh]

This is an interesting post. Dating for 2-months and people think that they deserve a form of break-up that they think they deserve. No. You don't DESERVE anything less than a text break-up. You may not like it and think it cowardly, rude, but she at least communicated that she didn't want to see you instead of disappearing.

 

YOU also didn't think she was LTR material, so, what is the real issue here? Did you come to this conclusion before she dumped you or before? I was dumped by a woman via email. I thought it crazy at first, then thought, well, knowing her, being adverse to confrontation and the crazy emotions that come with speaking to someone over the phone or never mind, in person, I understood.

 

Why do you think you DESERVE a phone call or a person to person? It sucks, but it's another "embraced" and "accepted" form of communication.

 

Bull $h!t. Times may change, fashions may change, music may change but manners are a mainstay in life.

 

It's not like she some 13 year old teenie bopper. She's a grown woman and she should act like one.

 

All you do is punch in a few numbers on your phone and tell the person on the other end that it's over and your moving on. It's called maturity, and people that age should have been taught manners that late in life.

[Rig88]

Admittedly it's rude and cowardly to end a relationship via text but its clear that you had your doubts about the relationship from the start , chances are she was probably feeling the same. You mentioned that you didnt think she was 'LTR material' anyway.

It's never going to be easy but she's probably done you a favour in the long run!