Morgan88 Posted June 1, 2014 Posted June 1, 2014 Hi, Around 4 years back I had a girlfriend but we broke up (I did) around 3.5 years back. She was the one who was hurt very badly but I knew this had to happen, that is why I decided to break up at an earlier stage so that things did not get messier later. She tried a lot to make contact with me but I avoided it all the time because I had to, just to keep things and feelings clean. She had asked me to meet her at least once in this year whenever I was going to visit the city. To this I agreed. Now, I contacted her and told her that I am coming to city in a few days. Since then we had started texting each other. I came to know that she had been in a couple of relationships after the break-up, the last one lasting for two and a half years. But eventually, she broke up with the guy as she always used to compare that guy to me (I don't know why). I am happy for her that she was in a relationship, and this I even told her. But a few days back she asked me over text if had any feelings left about our relationship (which was a long lost affair). I plainly replied "No". I don't know why but she is offended with me. I mean...why????? She was in relationships after our breakup, and still says that she has not got over the past, and questions me how could change so much in these years....... But, honestly speaking, I replied in a negative just because I did not want to start it all over again. I do have feelings for all the good time we spent together but just want to avoid any feelings to creep up again between the two of us. I just wish the best happens to her in her life (of which, I know, I do not want to be a part). She wants to meet me, I want to meet her too. I want to kind of hang out again but what bothers me is that I do not want to revive the relationship. I have feeling for her but not the kind of what I used to have back then. But the problem now is that she is responding very rude to my texts making me feel like the accused. What should I do? Should I go and see her or avoid it all together?
d0nnivain Posted June 1, 2014 Posted June 1, 2014 She wants you back. You wanted a walk down memory lane which you thought would be fun. When you rejected her again -- in her mind -- you brought all the old hurt back to the surface because she thought this was a chance for a reconcilliation. I would not meet up with her. It won't be fun.
Survivor12 Posted June 1, 2014 Posted June 1, 2014 Imagine this... You go through an operation to have an organ removed. After an extensive and painful period of recovery which has included setbacks and progress, the wound is still tender. One day, your doctor contacts you, offering you a glimmer of hope that he can make the residual pain disappear. So you allow him to poke and prod around the site of your incision even though it is a reminder of the pain you have endured. Believing that he wouldn't have come offering you hope without good reason, and, despite your misgivings about setting yourself up to endure the possibility of yet more pain, you continue to allow him to examine you several times and schedule another surgery. Finally, as the day of your surgery approaches, you ask him--"Will the surgery make the pain go away completely?" And he answers, "Of course not! I just haven't done one in a while and remember how much I enjoyed doing yours so I'm just going to open up the wound to have a peek. The pain is just something you will have to deal with. You don't mind, do you?" 1
Author Morgan88 Posted June 1, 2014 Author Posted June 1, 2014 She wants you back. You wanted a walk down memory lane which you thought would be fun. When you rejected her again -- in her mind -- you brought all the old hurt back to the surface because she thought this was a chance for a reconcilliation. I would not meet up with her. It won't be fun. But she said that she is mature enough now and realizes that what happened cannot be undone now....but why is she blaming me now??? She had insisted me to meet her assuring that she understands the past and present. I took her by her words (as should have been). But I want her to be happy anywhere she is, that is why I am doubtful on meeting her. I have clearly stated that I am not coming back and neither is she asking me to (her words). Is there any fault in taking a person by their words?
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