For Those of You Who Have Rebounded and Lived To Tell About It

[elseaacych]

For simplicity, we will define a rebound relationship as a romantic relationship that takes place shortly after either a long term relationship (more than two years), or a very emotionally intense fling (8-9 months tops.) It's duration would last... say... no more than a year.

 

Who did the dumping in the rebound relationship? Did you end up dumping the other person once you figured out they were not compatible? Or did they end up dumping you? What role did your emotional baggage from your prior relationship play during the duration of this relationship?

[Breadimus]

I recently stopped seeing a girl that I had been sleeping with for a month. I could not deal with the bf/gf things we would do other than the sleeping part as it just opened up barely healed wounds.

 

Furthermore I could identify very easily when she would start to very much like me. She would constantly laugh at any attempt at humour, eager to suggest things to do next time we saw each other and take an active interest in my life.

 

Though it was nice it was also awful. I wanted my ex to be the one sharing these experiences with me and the sex was just too different at times to enjoy.

 

Emotionally I could not deal with it and even though it was nice to have someone enjoy me, I did not enjoy them.

 

As such I ended the fling. I enjoyed it for the most part, just not when we were apart or 'in the morning'.

[stillfiguringitallou]

I WAS a rebound relationship - though - we lasted longer than a year ... we had a few breaks in there so IDK

 

Anyway - he carried MAJOR baggage with insecurity and trust into our relationship.

 

Was always asking me who my "type" of guy was ...

 

Was always breaking things off or pushing me away when things got "too real"

 

Never believed he was "good enough" and would be snide and snarky when it was at it's worst.

 

Now mind you - these weren't the NORMAL state of things - just ways it impacted our relationship.

 

In the end when he left - in a dramatic and seriously childish way (we had just lost a child) he used the fact that "you said such hurtful things to me" to prove he was "right all along" and I was just unstable or something.

 

It was two years - two years of hot/col back/forth and he left 4 days after we lost our child. You're damn skippy I said hurtful things (that I have since apologized for those I just said out of hurt and anger) - and for what it's worth it isn't like he didn't say hurtful things to me ALL the time.

[jbelle6]

One of my rebounds lasted 6 years, I was the dumper in the relationship before.

Another rebound last 2 years, I was the dumper before. There was another 2 year one that was same.

 

I don't even consider them rebounds, I just move on quick, when something is over it's over.

[Strength in Healing]

Eh I started dating a girl after my 4 year relationship ended.

 

The fire burned hot, fast.

 

2 months later, it went out. I broke up with her, but all her actions are what caused me to. She clearly wanted to but wasn't willing to, so I did it for her.

[elseaacych]

Thanks for sharing your experiences! They're not the happiest to share, but they're interesting from a social science perspective. It looks like the person who is rebounding attaches hard and fast, but also detaches hard and fast if things aren't going "right"...

[erklat]

Also I overlapped once unfortunately, not that I am proud of that either.

 

Rebound lasted three years, one year and a half at least was it beating a dead horse.

 

She loved me though, but since I haven't built that rs on healthy foundations, there was no

future there. Pity actually, she was ideal woman material.

I felt like she was clinging to me too much while I lost interest. Amicably broke up 17

days shy of our third anniversary.

 

After that I met my most recent ex whom broken my heart. Karma is a bitch, aye?

[elseaacych]

That is very sad, yes. But if the relationship lasted three years, why would you call it a rebound?