Bernief Posted May 25, 2014 Posted May 25, 2014 I few weeks ago my having an online relationship came to a head. My wife accepted my reasons and has made up her mind to stay with me. However instead of her geting one step a day closer to healing she seems to be getting worse and falling into dispare. My online relationship is ended and ended completely but my wife is having a difficult time moving past this. We agree we were both partly at fault for my seeking advice and friendship, we simply weren't paying enough attention to one another. She now sees that I did try to tell her I felt neglected over the course of years. We are also going to couples consuling. We go again on Monday, but I need some advice from anyone to help get her through tonight. She hasn't told any family or friends as I'm sure she feels embaraced by this but it's eating her up. If you have some advice or thoughts please share them, I love my wife and no doubt she loves me, I need to help her. Thanks in advance.
d0nnivain Posted May 26, 2014 Posted May 26, 2014 You have to give her time. This was a huge shock to her. Show her your browsing history -- or at least offer to. Be extra sweet to her -- flirty texts, flowers, a back rub . . . take her away for the weekend if you can, draw her a bubble bath if you can't. In essence, court her. Your OL relationship didn't flourish overnight. Your wife's forgiveness won't happen that fast either.
Scorpio Chick Posted May 26, 2014 Posted May 26, 2014 The marriage counselor is going to be better equipped to help her, and y'all. But, just as you were and are, and she is too, free to choose to do what you did, you're not free from the consequences of it. The truth is, she's either going to decide to, not forget about it, but decide to not bring it up and act hurt about it, or she won't decide that and you will hear about it from time to time, or maybe after more time has passed and the thoughts of what you did fester in her mind, she could even decide to abandon the marriage. It's a consequence of what you did. We can't have our cake and eat it too. I hope y'alls marriage works out, if you are truly sorry. And if she decides to stay in the marriage, she will, as hard as it is, will have to decide to drop it and carry on with you in a loving way. Wow, that is SO easy for ME to say!!! I wish y'all luck.
Recommended Posts