newenglandkid Posted May 29, 2014 Posted May 29, 2014 Hey JT, not sure if that is a sign of you getting over her, but it's a positive step brother. Right now I'm 1 week 3 days post BU and 2 days NC, and the thought of going on a dating site is sickening. So if you can not only go on those sites, but also forget about your ex, I'd say that's a good sign! Stay strong bro!
nightbird101 Posted May 30, 2014 Posted May 30, 2014 I'll also say I am really fighting the urge to contact her today. Ugh. I know exactly how you feel. Its only 10:30am for me and ive picked up the phone pinned in her number and almost hit the call button. Just before that i'll literally through the phone out of my hand (aiming for a soft spot for it to land of course). Im starting to see why quitting smoking is so damn hard
RedZin Posted May 30, 2014 Posted May 30, 2014 Mornings have always been the lowest point of the day for me too. I would wake earlier than I wanted to and get this sinking feeling - reality. I think it is a form of situational depression. I am better now. It just takes time. I don't think it's pathetic to cry. I think it helps move you through the process, and it is a process - this grieving a loss. Experts say it takes 3-5 years to completely get over major loss, but everyone is different. I feel as if I have dealt with the loss of the marriage pretty well, but there is one thing I cannot do. I am wondering if anyone else has this problem. I cannot look at the pictures in the photo albums. My daughter came and scanned them all - put them on a disk for me, but I can't look at them. Every time I try I start to cry. I think it just reminds me of the loss of the time when we were a happy family. We were very happy and the kids were so cute. I do wish I could look at the photos.
me85 Posted May 30, 2014 Posted May 30, 2014 (edited) I feel the same. I guess I have accepted the BU, and it's best that we have some space and time off each other to clear things up. But EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING. I must wake up to this enormous pain. I can literally feel the pain. And like what FredJone said, it makes it hard because I didn't do anything overly wrong or bad that deserve such heartache. Every time I tried to do something, like going to the movies, I feel the pain again, because I'm not doing it with him now... When will this stop?!! I have been crying like a baby again...... Oh no I'm so sorry. The hardest part at first, is living life without them and thinking about it constantly. That was incredibly hard for me too. Boy, do I know how you feel. Everyone says indifference is where it's at but I think acceptance is where it's at. Once you reach that point it's a breeze. Because it's a much more positive/healthy feeling than indifference. Indifference is basically not caring either way...ok, not feeling anything about it all. Ya, that's the wet dream we all want I guess but how do you learn/grow from that? Maybe I'm not making much sense to some (I hope you guys get what I mean.) Anyway. I wish I could wave a magic wand over everyone on LS and make all this pain and anguish vanish from our minds and hearts completely. Take care of you. Hugz Edited May 30, 2014 by me85
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