Oh man...

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Alright so last Thursday I went to my Universities hospital facility because I broke my finger playing basketball. I wasn't sure if it was broken or not but the doctor sent me to gets x-rays just in case. When I went to get the x-rays I was pleasantly greeted by one of the most beautiful girls I'd ever seen. She asked me to sit down so she could take the x-rays. Throughout the x-ray we started joking and flirting and seemed like we were clicking.

 

I made fun of her for being a loner or something because she was the only person working there and she responded with "yeah maybe that's why I'm single, what do you think?" I then responded with "no comment." Then we both laughed. This went on for a while. After it was done I had go back upstairs and I made a joke like "will I ever see you again" she said "well since it's broken I might have to stitch it up." I then joked "hope that doesn't happen" obviously hoping for the opposite. After I went upstairs the doctor decided to stitch it up. After it was done I got up the courage to go back downstairs and ask her out. She immediately said no because I was too young. I told her that wasn’t true and that I’m old enough to pay my own bills, taxes etc…etc…

 

I then pulled out my card and told her “listen here’s my card if you feel even the slightest impulse to go out just give me a call.” She then seemed to warm up to me a little and started asking questions about my major and other stuff. She also asked me my age (which is 20) but didn’t allow me to answer, she continued to guess “21,22?” and I answered “yeah… “not wanting to tell her I was 20. We continued to flirt for a while and then she started ready to leave and picked up my card. She then asked me if that was my cell phone number and not my office number because she didn’t want “some random secretary to answer.”

 

I then responded with “oh so you are planning to call me?” she then said “I never said that” and smiled. We were about to walk out together when her boss came out of nowhere and interrupted our conversation. She was obviously being rude but just barged in and asked the girl if she was leaving. She said yes and then she asked her if she wanted to walk to the parking lot together. The girl obviously wanted to keep talking to me but she couldn’t say no to her boss. SUCH A COCK-BLOCK! Anyway I really thought I was done because I didn’t get to seal the deal but as she walked away she smiled and said she would call me. I was ecstatic, obviously, and eager to get her call. It is now Sunday night and she has not contacted me.

 

I have to leave for a week after this week so I was hoping I could get a few dates in before I left. I have couple questions: 1. How long should I wait for her to call? 2. I was thinking of going back and talking to her in person if she doesn’t call by tonight for these reasons:

 

1. Since she was my doctor she access to my records and could obviously look up the fact that I’m twenty and not call.

2. Her boss was being very shady and might have convinced her that talking to patients like that is a bad idea and she got scared.

So with that in mind I feel like if it’s one of the above reasons I could convince her again by charming her in person.

 

Obviously you can tell I really liked this girl, and I’ve honestly never been this smooth with a girl I’ve like so I know it went well. I understand writing so much makes me come off as a little desperate but I really am not. I am just really analytical. I actually had another date with this girl I met at a party Friday but I can’t stop thinking about this other girl.

Thoughts haha?

Edited May 19, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[HappyLove]

I'm betting she's just giving it some time. Be patient.

[Assasda]

Youre little run in sounded Smooth.

Like a young James Bond huh?

 

 

It all sounds good man... Cant see anywhere you went wrong. If you dont see her in about a week, you can find some excuse to go back to the hospital again, if youre so inclined. If she seems that special - that is.

 

Otherwise just kinda move on, and look out for her call.

 

But.... very Smooth

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Thanks for the response guys, I really do like her so I hope she calls.

[Smilecharmer]

I thought you did great. She may not call because she has a bf or fiancé, she thinks you really are too young and she has other responsibilities like children and wants someone older or she was discouraged by boss because you are a patient. Regardless, you were awesome and the practice will pay off in confidence for next time when you see the next cute girl out and about.

Don't wait around. If she calls, she calls but if she doesn't, it sounds like it may be her loss.

[Poppygoodwill]

Doctors have ethical rules guiding any personal or romantic interaction with patients, for obvious reasons. So even if she does intend to call you, she might have to wait a 'cooling off' period of some weeks to get over the ethical bar. So no one can accuse her of hitting on patients (rightly or wrongly), which is a breach of professional conduct.

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Doctors have ethical rules guiding any personal or romantic interaction with patients, for obvious reasons. So even if she does intend to call you, she might have to wait a 'cooling off' period of some weeks to get over the ethical bar. So no one can accuse her of hitting on patients (rightly or wrongly), which is a breach of professional conduct.

Yeah that makes sense, I wasn't sure if it applies to Graduate students as well. If that is the case should I not try to go back?

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

I thought you did great. She may not call because she has a bf or fiancé, she thinks you really are too young and she has other responsibilities like children and wants someone older or she was discouraged by boss because you are a patient. Regardless, you were awesome and the practice will pay off in confidence for next time when you see the next cute girl out and about.

Don't wait around. If she calls, she calls but if she doesn't, it sounds like it may be her loss.

Thanks for the response!

 

She said she was single and she's like 25 or 26 max so the difference is not out of this world. but thank you for the support, hope she calls haha

[Poppygoodwill]

It applies to any patients, anyone who is performing the role of a doctor.

 

If you go back, you'll put her in a very awkward situation of having her colleagues think she's struck up a romance with someone she treated. Especially as a student, she could be judged for that.

 

If she wants to get in touch, she will.

 

If she doesn't, she won't.

 

Sit back and let the universe unfold. Let it be a surprise.

[Omei]

It's never good to start off with a lie....

 

By saying I pay my bills does nothing she may not want to date you because she thinks your mentality don't match with her's I have lived on my own since I was 18 but I know for a fact I wasn't mature at 20 at all even after being on my own your age gap just might be too big for her.

 

Anyway 4 days is a while I wouldn't bug her you gave her your number she will call if she wants too.

 

How is her boss being shady? Her employee isn't there to make small talk with guys her boss can interupt the convo anytime she deems necessary.

[ExpatInItaly]

It's never good to start off with a lie....

 

By saying I pay my bills does nothing she may not want to date you because she thinks your mentality don't match with her's I have lived on my own since I was 18 but I know for a fact I wasn't mature at 20 at all even after being on my own your age gap just might be too big for her.

 

Anyway 4 days is a while I wouldn't bug her you gave her your number she will call if she wants too.

 

How is her boss being shady? Her employee isn't there to make small talk with guys her boss can interupt the convo anytime she deems necessary.

 

I was about to ask the same thing. It's not being shady or rude. It's enforcing a professional boundary.

 

Anyway, as this poster said, she will call if she wants. Do you know how old she is? She might really just not be interested in dating a younger guy, particularly when she initially thought you were older than you are. She might in fact call but there's no guarantee. In the meantime, I would continue to meet other girls. Don't necessarily hold your breath for this one.

[David87]

Don't get your hopes up, it might never happen..

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Reasoning?

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Yeah but I am a patient and she didn't even acknowledge my existence which is rude and shady. I had a brand new strap a gauze on my arm and she said absolutely nothing. She also interrupted our conversation without excusing herself.

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Thanks for the response !

[dolceamourr]

To be honest with you, 20 vs 25 is a very, very significant age gap especially since you're the younger one and the guy. 5 years is not much if we're talking about 40 vs 45, but it's A LOT when we're talking 20 vs 25. I'm not saying you specifically are immature, but in general, a 20 year old guy is significantly more immature than a 25 year old female.

 

It's not that she didn't like you or think you were a great guy. I bet if anything she's bummed that you couldn't be a little older. But speaking as a 25 year old female, I would be extremely hesitant to pursue anything with a 20 year old guy, just because there is such a strong likelihood that he'd be way too immature for me. Don't take it personally if you don't hear back. To some people age is NOT just a number.

 

If you really take some time to be honest with yourself and think about it, maybe you can see this from her perspective. From age 25 on, most women start to think about serious commitment, marriage, children, career, and adult life etc. At 20, most guys are just starting to think about casual dating, casual sex, etc. It's a whole different world (again, in general). These are all the things going through her mind as she possibly decides against contacting you.

[Haydaman712]

Hey man hope I can help. I tend to disagree with some of the others.

 

You did great at first. But giving her your number instead of the other way around just took the ball out of your court. Girls just want to be girls. They want to show up and look hot. And that's it. Even if she likes you, if you give her the opportunity to bail on you she probably will. Now that she has your number she knows that she can call you whenever. The anticipation in non-existent for her.

 

Now I'm in no way saying lose hope. But don't sit around and wait for her like you are now. It will destroy you.

 

If it makes you feel any better I asked a girl out like you did. It took her 2.5 weeks to get back to me before we actually made a date.

 

So give her another week. If you don't hear back from her just forget about her. If you go back to the hospital it only shows her that you were thinking about her, and she'll be less interested. If you just disappear she'll wonder where you went. And if she likes you, she will text/call. Also, never spend more than two nights with a girl per week once you start dating. And don't ever talk about the future. Keep her guessing, be a man, and lead her. She'll reward you for it.

Edited May 20, 2014 by Haydaman712

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Unfortunately I don't have a week to wait because I gotta leave in June so I was hoping jut to get a few dates in before I left. I figure I might never see her again so why not play my only card and try to charm her into a date? Almost worked the first time!

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

To be honest with you, 20 vs 25 is a very, very significant age gap especially since you're the younger one and the guy. 5 years is not much if we're talking about 40 vs 45, but it's A LOT when we're talking 20 vs 25. I'm not saying you specifically are immature, but in general, a 20 year old guy is significantly more immature than a 25 year old female.

 

It's not that she didn't like you or think you were a great guy. I bet if anything she's bummed that you couldn't be a little older. But speaking as a 25 year old female, I would be extremely hesitant to pursue anything with a 20 year old guy, just because there is such a strong likelihood that he'd be way too immature for me. Don't take it personally if you don't hear back. To some people age is NOT just a number.

 

If you really take some time to be honest with yourself and think about it, maybe you can see this from her perspective. From age 25 on, most women start to think about serious commitment, marriage, children, career, and adult life etc. At 20, most guys are just starting to think about casual dating, casual sex, etc. It's a whole different world (again, in general). These are all the things going through her mind as she possibly decides against contacting you.

 

No I understand that but I feel like she was definitely being steered towards agreeing and I could have sealed the deal if it weren't for her boss. If it is the young thing I think I could at least convince her to get some coffee. I also have been an independent since I was 17 and I moved to the U.S by myself. I have a job with life insurance and I'm paying my own way through college. I would say I am more mature than most 20 year olds. Thanks for the advice though I really appreciate it!

[ExpatInItaly]

No I understand that but I feel like she was definitely being steered towards agreeing and I could have sealed the deal if it weren't for her boss. If it is the young thing I think I could at least convince her to get some coffee. I also have been an independent since I was 17 and I moved to the U.S by myself. I have a job with life insurance and I'm paying my own way through college. I would say I am more mature than most 20 year olds. Thanks for the advice though I really appreciate it!

 

You have a lot going for you, OP. Even if nothing comes of this, other girls will definitely be attracted to you. Keep in mind that this girl knows next to nothing about you so all she sees is a nice 20-year-old. There's nothing at all wrong with that but she's viewing it from a different perspective. Keep us posted!

[johnpatric]

Keep patience.. If she is in your destiny, then she will be yours buddy.. take it easy..

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

Well I went to see her again. I figured I had nothing to lose so I just went for it. I obviously didn't want to come off as a creeper so this is what I did.

 

I went over to the clinic once again, this time to renew my insurance information (which I had done a couple days ago but she doesn't have to know that) then I asked the girl at the front desk if it would be possible for me to get a copy or a print out of the X-Ray's I had gotten earlier that week. She then instructed me to go down to X-Ray and ask if that was possible. Step one = complete. I then went downstairs with a reason and a probable motive, check. She was there as I hoped she would be and seemed quite surprised to see me. I did not mention anything regarding our previous encounter but rather told her I was directed here to ask if it was possible to get a copy of my X-Ray. After she agreed to give me a copy she mentioned THE CALL. I was about to **** my pants when she said that her boss had kind of scared her away from calling. It seemed like she truly wanted to call but just didn't have the courage to do it, as I had suspected. I then asked her for her number (as I should have done while back) so that we could talk later, without her feeling uncomfortable. She agreed and long story short, I called her and we are going out Friday. BAM! I am feeling good. Thanks all for the advice!

[hasaquestion]

OP you've got balls and a dash of common sense. Lots of people on here could learn from you. Good work.

[Just-A-Normal-Guy]

OP you've got balls and a dash of common sense. Lots of people on here could learn from you. Good work.

Thanks hasaquestion means a lot!

[Assasda]

Another SMOOTH ASS move with the X-rays man.

This man here is on fire.

 

Its her boss's job to Cockblock, Its youre job to get around that block - as I see it.

 

Hope she's a sweet girl, and it goes well