What is with me lately?

[TheKook]

I feel... Different in my relationship recently.

 

I've been official with my girlfriend for a month now, but we had been dating for a few weeks prior to that. We've always talked constantly since day one and both have amazing chemistry. We understand each other, communicate really well and have a blast when we're in each other's presence.

 

But for the past week or so, I have felt somewhat disconnected from the relationship... Not just our relationship, but from basically everything in life. I'm about to graduate and I have so much on my plate right now. I could go into details, but between schoolwork, NJROTC, finals, losing a best friend, job searching, college. I feel so strange in life. I've hypothetically thought of breaking up with my girlfriend to see if some underlying reason in the relationship is causing this, but I don't see myself feeling anything but worse if I did... Whether I'm in a relationship with her or not, I know I'd still feel like this.

 

When we first got together, school still felt business as usual. I wasn't even thinking about finals or graduation or any of this I'm getting hit with right now. I just enjoyed things and the relationship felt totally natural. I just feel so mentally disconnected right now... When I hang out with her in person, I lose myself and forget about life and just have fun. I know I still have strong feelings for her... As I care about her so much and love everything about her.. She still gives me butterflies and all of that.

 

But I feel so weird in life. Like I've been thrown on my back and I'm struggling to get my head straight. I don't even know if it's the relationship that's making me feel this way for some reason, or if all of these huge life changes are affecting me... I just want it to stop. I want to go back to a few weeks ago when I felt so chill and didn't feel tired all the time, when I was excited and talking and texting my girlfriend for hours.

 

So basically, I'm struggling figuring out why I feel so disconnected with everything. I understand I'm one to have low and high points in my life, but I can't tell what this is. Is it my relationship (which is just fine) or is it because my life is in the process of changing drastically? I'm scared that the reason I feel this way is going to lead to me not wanting the relationship anymore. Which I can't even fathom because, no more than a couple weeks ago I had never been so sure of a girl. She makes me feel emotions like no one else has. I'm hoping once this is all over, I can calm down over summer and focus on her and go back to being me again.

 

Feel free to ask any questions... Someone just help me figure out what I'm feeling. Thank you so much for your help.

Edited May 15, 2014 by TheKook

[Raena]

It sounds like you have a lot of stressors in your life right now. Everyone responds to stress differently. It could be that you are just overwhelmed with everything you have on your plate. On top of that, you are getting ready to go through a major change in your life. Are you graduating college or high school? Either or, life is about to change dramatically for you and that can be a bit scary. It doesn't sound like this is about your girlfriend but more about what's coming soon for you. I think it's normal to feel anxiety and some sadness when something comes to an end (end of school for you).

[TheKook]

It sounds like you have a lot of stressors in your life right now. Everyone responds to stress differently. It could be that you are just overwhelmed with everything you have on your plate. On top of that, you are getting ready to go through a major change in your life. Are you graduating college or high school? Either or, life is about to change dramatically for you and that can be a bit scary. It doesn't sound like this is about your girlfriend but more about what's coming soon for you. I think it's normal to feel anxiety and some sadness when something comes to an end (end of school for you).

Yes! Anxious is a good way to describe it. I just feel anxious with all of this going on, and I'm graduating high school. I'm moving onto college next year...

 

Also, I've been smoking weed a bit more often recently. Could this have something to do with it?

[halfcrazed_i]

I'm sorry that you're going through a lot right now. It sounds like it may be overwhelming you -- and that you're subconsciously trying to distance yourself from whatever issues you're having (hence, that disconnected feeling).

 

I know that you have quite a bit to figure out. And I know that this is all affecting your relationship with your gf. But coming from someone who has gone through a similar experience (my bf went through a series of life-changing events a couple of years back), I ask you to at least talk to your girlfriend about what's going on in your head. Don't shut her out, and don't assume too quickly that she won't understand.

 

She could be a pillar of strength for you right now. But if not, if you guys decide to end the relationship anyway, at least she will have a clear idea as to why. Besides, can you imagine how you'd feel that, at the end of the day, when everything is back on track -- you realize that it was a big mistake to have broken up with your gf?

 

Tackle the things in your life one by one. It will eventually make sense, I promise you. Just be patient and don't do anything too drastic that you can never undo...

[todreaminblue]

Yes! Anxious is a good way to describe it. I just feel anxious with all of this going on, and I'm graduating high school. I'm moving onto college next year...

 

Also, I've been smoking weed a bit more often recently. Could this have something to do with it?

 

 

yes weed sucks....it takes your motivation for life and puts it down the the toilet ....where all weed should go before it is smoked......physically it slows reactions.......mentally and emotionally it changes your perceptions your goals and insight become limited to passing the bong for the next cone, your relationships suffer,can cause depression, until of course the bong comes your way again, causes financial instability....... is a threat to young minds and hearts,have you ever seen a habitual pot smoker over forty,trust me it isnt pretty its just a sadness that you see, leads to other drugs most of the time,lower grades, memory loss, pot kicks hope in the head a few times with steel capped boots on, till all you hope for is getting on without having to wait too long for delivery, causes anger and aggressive behaviour on the come down in some people, causes withdrawals in babies born to pot smoking mums and or possible physical mental and emotional challenges for babies as they grow .....delays in mental capacity and function...causss slow swimmers(sperm) in males and or possible complete infertility if habitually smoking...am i against pot.......i am not sorry that i am.....i have witnessed the effects of pot .......and it aint cool man....abuse aggression hopelessness futility and the criminal aspect and court dates to attend as an advocate and support person .......

 

 

try not doing weed and see how life picks up and i can almost guarantee it will........in fact i will guarantee it....or keep smoking and you will nevr get to see or know how good your life might be without it...its up to you......i am hoping for you that you want to give no weed a try, i have loads of hope to give away ....cause my hopes aint stuffed up by pot........best wishes....crosses fingers....and toes and everything else i have to cross.....prayers for ya....good luck...............deb

[TheKook]

Can coming down from a high make you feel emotionally different? I thought it was uncommon. I've smoked thursday, monday and yesterday.

 

Edit: Every time I smoke, I still feel the effects even a couple days afterwards. Even now I still feel like my mind is foggy.

Edited May 15, 2014 by TheKook

[deathandtaxes]

Can coming down from a high make you feel emotionally different? I thought it was uncommon. I've smoked thursday, monday and yesterday.

 

Edit: Every time I smoke, I still feel the effects even a couple days afterwards. Even now I still feel like my mind is foggy.

 

 

 

That's the wonderful world of weed. It has linger aftereffects that can last for days. And as todreaminblue says, it is terror on young brains.

 

 

You have so much going on. Weed is just an escape. You need to go talk to somebody about how you're feeling. A parent. A teacher. A professional.