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Posted

Anyone out there suffer from this? If so, can you shed some light on the reasoning behind this. Those of us like me whose exes may suffer from this, what are your thoughts on this?

Posted

I've read some stuff about this, people more in love with the feeling of being "in love" more so than the person they're in love with.

 

Typical scenario, short term (few year) relationships, not much gap between them aka Relationship Hopper.

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Posted
I've read some stuff about this, people more in love with the feeling of being "in love" more so than the person they're in love with.

 

Typical scenario, short term (few year) relationships, not much gap between them aka Relationship Hopper.

 

Yikes. :bunny:

  • Like 1
Posted

PEA are very powerful chemicals

Posted
PEA are very powerful chemicals

 

Pea?

 

...

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Posted

Yeah, I know the characteristics regarding hopping from relationship to relationship. Any thoughts to as why they do this? Why they are just in love with being in love? Once the honeymoon dies so does their interest...

Posted
Yeah, I know the characteristics regarding hopping from relationship to relationship. Any thoughts to as why they do this? Why they are just in love with being in love? Once the honeymoon dies so does their interest...

 

It could be many reasons.

 

I can only speak from what I think my exes case was - and that's to avoid his OWN issues internally.

 

Think of it like this - the only way we as dumpees can find some sort of peace is to get out there, distract ourselves and take our minds off of the heartbreak.

 

Some dumpers have that kind of mentality all around. As soon as the honeymoon phase wears off - they jump into something else. "Ooh shiny!" therefore they can avoid any insecurities, doubts or self loathing because they have a new distraction.

 

It's a cycle man, a cycle that leaves a wake of shattered hearts.

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  • Author
Posted

Think of it like this - the only way we as dumpees can find some sort of peace is to get out there, distract ourselves and take our minds off of the heartbreak.

 

Some dumpers have that kind of mentality all around. As soon as the honeymoon phase wears off - they jump into something else. "Ooh shiny!" therefore they can avoid any insecurities, doubts or self loathing because they have a new distraction.

 

It's a cycle man, a cycle that leaves a wake of shattered hearts.

 

Preach on STM, preach on...

Posted

It may be difficult to see this in yourself except in retrospect -- what do you miss most about past relationships, the girl or the relationship? For me, the answer every time is the relationship. I was/am very bad at attracting women and didn't want to deal with that phase of dating any longer than I had to. Now, that doesn't mean that I didn't care for these GFs or wasn't attracted to them or that they were interchangeable. But when there is self-induced pressure to be in a relationship, it can interfere with figuring out what it's like to really fall in love with someone.

Posted

After learning that my ex-fiancé was pursuing my best friend, he told me that he was never in love with me. From the way he talked to her (a clearing had FINALLY been activated in his heart, he hadn't felt inclined to pursue anyone in ages, hadn't felt this vulnerable in a long time...), it definitely sounded like he loved the idea of being in love, especially since he hardly knew her. Shiny, new plaything. Idealization. Hormones. Meh.

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Posted

Forgive me if I'm on the wrong level here but I've been thinking about this a lot lately! I think three are just some personality types who will always a be a 'slave to love' we live for that emotional roller coaster feeling , the ups and downs and all the intensity of being in love. I'd always rather 30 seconds of something wonderful over a lifetime of nothing special. Which can be good in some ways , but leads to no end of trouble in other ways. All in all I'd say yes, I'm in love with being in love.

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