batgirl Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 Hi everyone! I'm a longtime lurker but this is my first post. I'm somewhat recently divorced, about six months, after being married for 5 years. I reconnected with a friend from grade school and we started talking on facebook and texting. We were in contact on and off most days for a month. We went on our first date last Wednesday and I thought it went amazing. We were laughing, clicking on every level, never ran out of topics to discuss, etc. We even made out a little (which made me feel a little like a teenager again). At the end of the night, he walked me to my car, kissed me goodnight, and asked when he could see me again. I said I was free Friday and we made soft plans to get together. He texted me after I arrived home to tell me what a great time he had. We briefly chatted back and forth on Thursday and when I texted him Friday about getting together that night, I never heard back. I didn't think too much of it and just went out with friends instead. But, since then, I've heard absolutely nothing from him. I've texted him a few times (maybe 3 or 4) and called and left a message yesterday and received nothing. I'm pretty messed up from my marriage and this is really screwing with my head. I'm rusty at dating, but at this point should I just assume he's blowing me off? I know he's not hurt/dead, etc. because we share some friends and I would have heard. I just don't like not knowing where I stand or what has happened and this is driving me nuts.
2sunny Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 Are you positive he's not married - or taken? A mid week date with no communication over a weekend usually send a red flag waving that he's committed to someone else! When has he communicated prior to this! Only weekdays or over any day AND night?
clia Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 when I texted him Friday about getting together that night, I never heard back. I didn't think too much of it and just went out with friends instead. But, since then, I've heard absolutely nothing from him. I've texted him a few times (maybe 3 or 4) and called and left a message yesterday and received nothing. Yes, he's blowing you off. 2
Author batgirl Posted May 12, 2014 Author Posted May 12, 2014 I'm positive he's not married; he's divorced and I know the story through mutual friends. I never considered that he would be in a committed, relationship, though. We didn't talk on the phone much, mostly text, but our communication covered weekdays, weeknights, and all hours. I'm not a phone-talker and prefer text so this alone didn't raise any red flags. It sucks, but I think I already knew he's blowing me off. I just don't trust my own opinion.
HappyLove Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 Well, look at how he's treating you already. This isn't someone you'd want to pursue if he comes back with some excuse. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 Yes, it's safe to say he's blowing you off. You've tried a few times to contact him and he chose not to respond. Don't reach out to him again. Hard as it is, try not to take it personally. Who knows, an ex may have popped back into his life or he may be dating other people too. Is it telling of his character that he can't even be bothered to respond to you.
DArtagnan2 Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 with cell phones, to go more then a day without contact, when the contact has been consistent, and he is alive and well, then you can't really mistake that something else came up that he did instead. Unless of course his phone broke, he got a new one and doesn't have your number. However, you said you two have mutual friends so I would suspect he can get in touch with you through one of them. Anyway, it would have been nice for him to be a standup guy and tell you straight out whats up, but most times when someone doesn't respond, they don't care to anymore or they have nothing really good that they can say to respond to the lack of communication from them. it usually never makes sense when someone just stops writing, but it still happens more then we want it to.
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