love2004 Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 My fiance' is friends with his 2nd ex-wife. No kids together. Anyway, I know she calls him sometimes when he is at work to talk with him. A few months ago she called in a tizzy because she was drunk, drugged, and depressed and wanted to detox. He ran to her side and spent the day getting her all set. Made me mad, but whatever. Now it is 4 months later and she still calls (less than her daily calls when she was first detoxing), but I really find I do not like sharing him with her. As an ex-wife myself, I know the only time I talked with my ex was when I was hoping to get back together. I really want to ask him nicely to discontinue his relationship with her (I don't have any issues with his other female friend). I just don't like it and it makes me feel really anxious. Would it be selfish to ask him to discontinue their friendship? Their friendship is only by phone calls, but on his cell he doesn't even put her name on her number in the phone book. It is just odd. I am afraid she is going to call in desperation again and I can't go through that horrible feeling again. Anyone else have a b/f still friends with an ex (without children together) and how do you handle it.
tiki Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 She's called an ex for a reason!!! He needs to let go of her, she's using him as a crutch. How long have the two of you been together? Have you mentioned your insecurities? I'd confront him with the issue, see what he says.
WalkingTall Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 I have a little different perspective, since I am still friends with an ex-fiance and in a wonderful relationship right now. There are times when you are in need to reach out to someone that was close to you and can understand certain situations. If during their relationship he had compassion for her situation, then she may seek that again in her time of need. I really don't think that you have anything to worry about, in regards to either one seeking to rekindle their relationship. I still talk with my ex, with full knowledge of my GF. She knows the passion I have for her, and that friends is all my ex will ever be to me.
tiki Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 I think it's healthy to cut your ties with your ex. You were once intimate with her, for God's sake. Would you like your mate doing it to you? I mean, really? Isn't a marriage sacred? Or supposed to be? Since when is there room for an ex?!
WalkingTall Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 Good point Tiki... Ask him what he gets out of this relationship with the ex.... is there some underlying need there?
tiki Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 I understand the normal talks when there are children involved, but other than that, wasn't the relationship supposed to (brace yourself) end?!
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