Smileygirl1 Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 So I thought this guy (we'll call him John) was always kinda cute. I knew he was dating this girl tho. They broke up a couple months ago over petty drama stuff and she chose her family's' side. She didn't stand up for John or their relationship. She did this to a guy before him. John and the girl dated for about 8-9 months. They were pretty serious and he said they talked about marriage. He just vented this all out to me n my friend one night when I barely knew him at the time. He said he still loved her. Well we hung out the other day and it ended up just being us 2 due to the group we got together being busy. He flirted and he always calls me cute in his texts. I didn't want to flirt too much back cause I knew he was probably still into his ex and I didn't want to freak him out either lol. I was saying I had a crush on a guy when I was little with his name and he said "Well maybe I have a crush on you haha". One minute he'd be tickling me and stuff and the next he'd be so distant. While he was driving me home he said he made a pact that he didn't want to date for a year. He wanted to just focus on school n stuff. He said he's having fun being single n just talking to people. It made me feel like I was just a rebound flirt toy. So I got quiet and when he dropped me off I just walked out saying bye n thanks lol. The next morning he texted "Hey thanks for the hug. I was gonna walk you to your door but you bailed." I hate how he acts like he likes me but then doesn't the next second. He's 22 and I'm 19. He wanted to meet my family and introduced me to his. I think I'm just gonna back off cause I don't want to start liking someone who has no intention of ever being with me. In his texts he's always hinting he likes me but who knows to how many other girls he's doing this too, right? Or even his ex! She is a complete two face btw who treated him like crap. I've known her for years and she acts likes she's better than everyone else. She acts like an angel to her fam but she's not. He deserved so much better and I hate how bad she and the family hurt him. He deleted her off of fb yet liked the stuff her family posted of her n talked to them on there. Once she saw I liked a picture he got tagged in, she liked it right away. Lol idk thought that was odd. He became friends with my bro and he said he doesn't do that to every girl...He jokes saying not every guy is man enough to flirt with me and sing to me like he did... What should I do? He also was worried people thought we were together because he didn't want the ex starting drama saying he got over her fast. He didn't want to look like the bad guy. So he said he's careful on who hangs with. He said it was nothing against me tho... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Smileygirl1 Posted May 12, 2014 Author Share Posted May 12, 2014 Thanks! I mean after 3 months of being done with my ex last year, I didn't want to date anyone either. I had short crush on a guy but that was it. I just feel like he's waiting for things to work out between them and she's got him wrapped around his finger. I feel like if she said she wanted him back, he'd take her. :/ Cause it was over family drama n stuff. She even kissed him a couple weeks after they broke up saying she missed him but then dissed him again..sad. People say to just be myself and maybe he'll fall for me but that sounds kinda stupid. I don't want to wait on him. Link to post Share on other sites
halfcrazed_i Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 I think you pretty much got it down. Don't wait on him. Go on with your life... and if after some time, he comes back to you and your gut says that he's sincere, then go for it. For now, it doesn't look like he's in the best shape or position to be with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 He made it clear hes not interested in anything serious because of his breakup, hes single hes allowed to flirt. He has a lot of healing to do and it won't even start till hes no longer in contact with her, so there's no reason to get involved. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 Enjoy the flirting but understand that is all it will ever be. Live your life accordingly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Smileygirl1 Posted May 12, 2014 Author Share Posted May 12, 2014 How should I respond to his texts? I'm taking a long time to reply to them right now...haha. When he flirts I'm just not gonna do anything back. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 Not doing anything back is your choice. If it is the one that makes you most comfortable, do that. Personally I'd flirt back. Practice makes perfect. You can hone your own flirting skills knowing that these are just words that don't mean anything. I would not flirt more than a PG way though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Smileygirl1 Posted May 12, 2014 Author Share Posted May 12, 2014 I don't mind flirting, but I just don't want to end up falling for him in the midst of it. And I want him to know I'm more than just a flirt toy for him when he wants it. Ah... Link to post Share on other sites
bluegreen Posted May 12, 2014 Share Posted May 12, 2014 Do you mind being a rebound a quick hook up or booty call ? I say this not to offend you but to understand your logic about this cause if you do not mind are also just want to have some fun then go for it. Otherwise he pretty much told you where he's at "listen" to him ... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Smileygirl1 Posted May 13, 2014 Author Share Posted May 13, 2014 He took me out to eat. I didn't flirt with him but he did to me. If I don't respond to his short texts or somethin, he'll text another to start a convo. He's giving me the signs he likes me, but idk what he wants. After I said somethin was a turn on he wanted to know my other ones and he gave me his..he's not the fooling around type of guy and said he's careful of hanging with a girl alone so that rumors don't back to his ex. (she'll make up a story and make him look bad..she's always the "victim") But we hung alone today so yeah. Advice? Should I just keep being me and not flirting and see where this could go? I don't mind having a friend as long as he doesn't lead me on or something.. Link to post Share on other sites
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