volley Posted May 10, 2014 Posted May 10, 2014 I men this man back in March at a bar. He asked for my # and introduced me to his aunt and friends. Then we texted each other the next day. Then it became every other day. Then we stopped. I recently came into contact with him at the end of april. He actually surprised me and showed up with his friends at this band gig. He introduced me to his another friends and we danced and laughed all night. Then we texted each other everyday it was mostly me first. This wednesday we had a good convo and then thursday I texted him he want to go for drinks nothing and then friday I said have a good day nothing. Today I said hi nothing. What the hell. Why isnt he texting. Maybe I acted to clingy or needy. Maybe I should give him space or maybe hes busy. I really liked this guy.
carhill Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 TBH, a guy who calls you up and asks you on an official date is who I'd be sweating bullets about on a Saturday night. This keyboard romeo? Meh. 7
Rexxy Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 Sounds like he's making you chase him, game on. Just back off a bit for now and have fun doing other things. 1
Catwoman13 Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 I men this man back in March at a bar. He asked for my # and introduced me to his aunt and friends. Then we texted each other the next day. Then it became every other day. Then we stopped. I recently came into contact with him at the end of april. He actually surprised me and showed up with his friends at this band gig. He introduced me to his another friends and we danced and laughed all night. Then we texted each other everyday it was mostly me first. This wednesday we had a good convo and then thursday I texted him he want to go for drinks nothing and then friday I said have a good day nothing. Today I said hi nothing. What the hell. Why isnt he texting. Maybe I acted to clingy or needy. Maybe I should give him space or maybe hes busy. I really liked this guy. Wait a minute - you're not even going out with this guy and texting every day?? And you're initiating it most of the time??? No wonder he dropped out of contact. You were desperate. Next time, chill on the texts. He'll ask you out if you give him the breathing space. 2
stillafool Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 This guy probably has plenty of women and when he runs into one he has a good time with her for a few days then......hey there's another one of my admirers and he's off with her. I hope you're not spending too much time thinking about him. 1
Author volley Posted May 11, 2014 Author Posted May 11, 2014 Catwoman13- your totally right. I got way to excited because he came to me and it was exactly what I liked and I acted desperate. Now that pushed him to no contact and not interested. Im hoping he will contact me within a week but if not is it stupied to contact him? Just to say hey sorry I got excited and acted desperate. But im not.
Michelle ma Belle Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 Catwoman13- your totally right. I got way to excited because he came to me and it was exactly what I liked and I acted desperate. Now that pushed him to no contact and not interested. Im hoping he will contact me within a week but if not is it stupied to contact him? Just to say hey sorry I got excited and acted desperate. But im not. Hell no!! If you really aren't desperate then forget about him. If he wants you, he'll move mountains to make contact with you. Period. Men aren't nearly as cryptic as women so if he's not reciprocating text communication, he isn't interested. He's probably off and on to the next bar chick. Move on already. 2
bluegreen Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 "Pen Pal" relationships are overrated. A lot of guys and girls are not interested in them. Next time you want to talk to a guy: 1. Goto the contacts on phone. 2. Scroll to the name of the guy you want talk too and select it. 3. You will hear ringing. 4. If you get a recording, follow the directions and leave them a message to return your call. 5. You hear the other person say "Hello". 6. You two are now free to talk and not have to wait on responses or have to interpet the meaning / tone. It's pretty cool technology you should try it out sometime. Oh this was a good laugh right when I needed Wonder who is behind it M-F cause sarcastic humor I mean just right touch of it can be both hilarious and hot
mammasita Posted May 11, 2014 Posted May 11, 2014 Um, he doesn't sound like he's into you? Was that the question?
Author volley Posted May 11, 2014 Author Posted May 11, 2014 Ya, sounds like I blew it by acting desperate. In all reality I didnt mean too. I guess I got excited way to fast when I seen a good thing in front of me.
Author volley Posted May 11, 2014 Author Posted May 11, 2014 Just the tip- it sucks were I live in the country with hell phone service. The best way is to text unless u want me to call in which the convos will always get dropped. But that made me laugh. Good one I must say.
whichwayisup Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 I men this man back in March at a bar. He asked for my # and introduced me to his aunt and friends. Then we texted each other the next day. Then it became every other day. Then we stopped. I recently came into contact with him at the end of april. He actually surprised me and showed up with his friends at this band gig. He introduced me to his another friends and we danced and laughed all night. Then we texted each other everyday it was mostly me first. This wednesday we had a good convo and then thursday I texted him he want to go for drinks nothing and then friday I said have a good day nothing. Today I said hi nothing. What the hell. Why isnt he texting. Maybe I acted to clingy or needy. Maybe I should give him space or maybe hes busy. I really liked this guy. Wow, too much contact and texting..Just because you like texting, doesn't mean he likes to or wants to keep in daily touch with you. Maybe once or twice a week, try that and see how it goes. Do give him space and see how it goes. Let him text you next. If he doesn't then you'll know he's not that into you. It takes no effort to text someone back. Keep that in mind.
Author volley Posted May 12, 2014 Author Posted May 12, 2014 Whichwayisup- do think contacting him down the road to apologize for all the texting will be ok? Is just after the fact ita like wow no wonder and now I feel stupied.
littleplanet Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 Sounds like leaning a little too much on the teckie toy, and not enough on the personal contact face to face. The device is just words on a screen. Face to face has all kinds of other information that can easily tell you all you really need to know. It's so easy to hide behind non-contact. I'd defer the whole thing, until the next time you see him again in person.
luvshaq Posted May 13, 2014 Posted May 13, 2014 I men this man back in March at a bar. He asked for my # and introduced me to his aunt and friends. Then we texted each other the next day. Then it became every other day. Then we stopped. I recently came into contact with him at the end of april. He actually surprised me and showed up with his friends at this band gig. He introduced me to his another friends and we danced and laughed all night. Then we texted each other everyday it was mostly me first. This wednesday we had a good convo and then thursday I texted him he want to go for drinks nothing and then friday I said have a good day nothing. Today I said hi nothing. What the hell. Why isnt he texting. Maybe I acted to clingy or needy. Maybe I should give him space or maybe hes busy. I really liked this guy. Give him space. My last partner was too clingy and called/texted me everyday. It got annoying.
singme2sleep Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 Ya, sounds like I blew it by acting desperate. In all reality I didnt mean too. I guess I got excited way to fast when I seen a good thing in front of me. Happens to the best of us...
ja123 Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 Whichwayisup- do think contacting him down the road to apologize for all the texting will be ok? Is just after the fact ita like wow no wonder and now I feel stupied. Don't contact him to apologize for being yourself: you'll look even more stupid, desperate, and pathetic. He's not that into you. When you meet a guy who is into you and you are him, then things will flow, and you'll be able to be yourself. You won't have the hot and cold treatment. You might want to check out the site baggagereclaim to read about guys who blow hot and cold, as well as assclowns. 3
HappyLove Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 If you contact this guy to tell him you're sorry for being desperate I will come find you and throw your phone in the ocean...hopefully before you hit send. Move on! He's not that into you. You deserve better! 2
Zahara Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 Whichwayisup- do think contacting him down the road to apologize for all the texting will be ok? Is just after the fact ita like wow no wonder and now I feel stupied. God, why would it even cross your mind to do this?! It would make you sound more desperate and clingy. He's not that into you, OP regardless of whether you texted him or not. If a guy is into you, you reaching out would have been appreciated and reciprocated. 1
soccerrprp Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 During the first go, it doesn't seem that you were being too clingy. His texting stopped. During this time, you didn't try to contact him again, right? Nah, he is not that into you. Did he even ask you out on a date? Doesn't sound like it. He's not into you. 1
MissBee Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 TBH, a guy who calls you up and asks you on an official date is who I'd be sweating bullets about on a Saturday night. This keyboard romeo? Meh. Ditto. He's not that interested and you shouldn't internalize it and act like you did anything wrong. He didn't seem like he was ever that interested to begin with, if he were, he'd have been the one to invite you out ages ago and would definitely be initiating more. I say in almost every thread on texting that I'm not into texting as primary communication when I'm just getting to know someone because it just feels like a waste of time and promotes ambiguity. If a man is interested, I need him to call and ask me out and actually make plans....he can text in between. But yea...you may have really liked him but he didn't feel the same. It's like that sometimes. You didn't invest that much so brush it off and know in the future that it's a two way street and expect a bit more from a man than just idle texts. 1
MissBee Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 Whichwayisup- do think contacting him down the road to apologize for all the texting will be ok? Is just after the fact ita like wow no wonder and now I feel stupied. NO! Stop assuming you did something wrong. You didn't. He just isn't interested and you texting him to apologize for texting will make you seem very desperate. Cut contact and move on. Sorry, but I don't give anyone this much head space. Well first off, I allow a man to express his interest in me and to do the asking out. I show my interest and give him the invitation and if he doesn't follow up...I move on. If you have my number and text me sometimes but have never initiated going out or anything, I assume you're not interested and keep it moving. No man is THAT great where I'm going to be twisting like a pretzel to get his attention or sit there blaming myself for his lack of interest. Relationships and dating work best when there is MUTUAL interest and when there is, you almost never have to play guessing games. If you're guessing or things are one-sided, suffice it to say, it isn't mutual and that means you should move on. Dating isn't a competition or where you're auditioning for someone's attention...it should be two people equally interested, equally making effort and being open and equally wanting to see where it goes...not a cat and mouse chase. 2
Author volley Posted May 16, 2014 Author Posted May 16, 2014 So he texted back and said that im not bothering him that im good and he has been crazy busy and that hes sorry. We texted for a short period of time but he seemed still interested. He even texted me a pic of a car that hes working on. Said he has an excuse this time. He seems to be honest about being busy working and then doing stuff at his house working cars. Its just half of me wants him to text me and ask me out so we can get to know each other on a face to face level. He has only one time but I was having dinner with a friend and missed his call. But hasnt since. i decided to give him space. I actually deleted his number out of my phone and wrote it down. So i dont initiate the text convo first all the time and let him do it. Hopefully thats the right choice.
giblesp Posted May 16, 2014 Posted May 16, 2014 F' him. Get a guy who gives you the consistency and attention you're looking for. 1
Author volley Posted May 17, 2014 Author Posted May 17, 2014 Well I call the guy and asked him if he wanted to hang for a bit since I was in town. He told me he would text me. He states im sorry but tonight's just not going to work. I told him I new it was going to happen and he states whatever if I new like 5 hrs ago it might have been a go.I said lol just be a man and man up and tell me you dont want to get to know me and hangout. Nothing. I think I messed this up from the get go. I texted him too much. Was to clingy and judgemental. I think I will step back learn from my mistakes. Maybe a few months down the road contact him. He is a man that i am looking for.
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