princesspolly1 Posted May 10, 2014 Posted May 10, 2014 I was in a long distance relationship for about 6 months. He lives in the UK and I live in Australia. We met when he was living here temporarily, in Australia, last year and were together for only 2 months. In those two months we fell madly in love. I mean crazily in love… I felt like I was in a movie. I honestly felt like I had met my soul mate... It was intense, and I know, it was infatuation. But there was also something much deeper, I’m sure of it. We had a strong connection. He is currently studying Pharmacy (his second degree, he's 27), and is in his final year and I just started Grad school here in Australia (I'm 23). When he first left for back home, giving the shortness of our relationship, I agreed with him that it was best we tried to keep it light. We didn't ever make it official boyfriend/girlfriend, but he did start to say I love you. After he left Australia we kept up a long distance relationship seamlessly with Skype sessions and long phone calls for 4 months, with the promise of him returning this year. He invited me to visit him for 3 weeks in London in January and when I said yes, he said I was the best thing that has ever happened to him etc. He said I was the perfect woman, that we were on another level, that I was amazing. Our 3 weeks together in London were amazing. Our goodbye at the airport was full of tears. He SOBBED. We told each other we loved each other and promised that we would see each other again in another 3 months. Before our goodbyes he asked me to move to London in September and said that we would rent an apartment together. He said "We made something out of nothing...we have to give this a shot". So I returned to Australia and only a few weeks later I felt him pulling away. He stopped texting me sweet nothings. Phone calls were less and less. I confronted him after about a month. He tells me that college – his final year in Pharmacy – is becoming "too much for him to juggle with a serious relationship". He failed an important exam and has to do a re-sit soon. In a long text message, he tells me that the situation between us is “getting too stressful”. He says its too expensive to get to Australia – his parents won’t help him $. He tells me he feels it’s like a contract when I told him that he promised he would come back to Australia, but that he would still be coming back he just doesn't know when. He tells me if we lived in the same place, things would be completely different. He said that I put too much pressure on him during his exams. Then at the end of the text message he says he doesn’t want to end things but that I need to relax??? I text him back and say Ok…. Let’s go our separate ways and reconnect when he's back in Australia. I tell him I thought we were in love. He texts me back saying, “You can’t guilt trip me”, "I can’t afford it”, and then “Don’t pull the plug”. I message him back saying I’m not guilt tripping you, I’m telling you how I feel, and that this wasn’t meant to be right now but that when he is back in Australia we should reconnect. I truly thought that this was the best thing for both of us. It was a knee jerk reaction but I really didn’t want to ruin what we had. Anyway, a day later, he sends me an emotional message saying that his heart is breaking and he doesn’t want it to end. Two days later I call him. We talk for half an hour, neither of gets emotional and I try to be understanding and fair. We can’t agree as to what to do – I suggest we see other people and take a step back from the relationship but he doesn’t like the thought of me seeing other people. He says he will call me back the next day once we have cleared our heads. 2 MONTHS LATER. No phone call. I have received one text message. I sent him a text asking him for closure and all he said was “I can’t handle what you said to me on the phone”. After that, which was about a month ago, I tried to be strong and went No Contact. I caved last week and sent him a message saying, “I miss you”. No reply. I deleted him on Facebook. It’s hard for me to be angry about this because my feelings for him are still so strong. I just feel so sad. I am trying so hard to get over this. But because it was so intense, and unlike anything either of us has ever experienced (He’s 27, I’m 23), I have become completely obsessed about him. I deleted him on Facebook and tried to erase him, but he has taken over my head. I have spoken to friends and family about this but they are as confused as I am . What the hell happened? Does he truly not love me anymore? That’s what I’m having trouble coming to terms with. Our love was so strong and intense. We adored each other and now it’s as though I never existed…. Please help me… I can't move on until I understand what happened.... Is it truly over?
KaliLove Posted May 10, 2014 Posted May 10, 2014 Unfortunately, I think what happened was that you were in a long distance relationship with a dude in his 20's. Dudes in their 20's want physical contact. Anything less than that just is not going to fly. I'm so sorry you're hurting..but you're 23..you have SO much time to meet someone who lives in your country. You'll be just fine.
Recommended Posts