chocolate_boy Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 Ok so I have a very embarrassing problem. Been seeing this wonderful girl for about 2 weeks now... We get on so well, she's gorgeous, on our second date we got v drunk and went back to hers... but I couldn't perform... This has never happened to me before, mentally I really wanted to, but physically it wasn't happening. I'm only in my early 20s... so naturally it was devistating. I put it down to being drunk.. however we almost did again last night and cos I was thinking about it so much... again I had a problem. This has upset me so much, she's being very understanding, but I feel like such a loser. Any one had this problem before, what can I Do?!
tanbark813 Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 It's called whiskey d!ck. Don't drink as much next time.
Author chocolate_boy Posted February 8, 2005 Author Posted February 8, 2005 Yeah i gathered that, but it happened second time too when I didn't drink at all.. but I was concentrating so much on keeping it up that I lost it. I'm worried now.
tanbark813 Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 I wouldn't sweat it too much man. You might just be a little intimidated by her. When you get more comfortable with her your manhood will probably erect itself more easily.
HotCaliGirl Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 Maybe you would be a good candidate for Viagra? Maybe you just need to take medication. First try to have sex with another woman and see if it happens again, and if it doesn't, it just might have something to do with her - like you get too nervous around her and are worried that what happened while you were drunk will happen again.
allina Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 Originally posted by HotCaliGirl [color=blue]Maybe you would be a good candidate for Viagra? Maybe you just need to take medication. First try to have sex with another woman and see if it happens again, and if it doesn't, it just might have something to do with her - like you get too nervous around her and are worried that what happened while you were drunk will happen again. [/color] Are you serious?!?!? Viagra, he was so consumed with that happend before that it happend again. And have sex with another woman? Ummmmm no. I say relax it will be fine, don't worry about performing next time, just let it happen.
Numb Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 I have the same problem with having sex for the first time with some girl, its just nerves. It will pass don't worry, just don't think about it or it will get worse. You'll be strong like bull in no time trust me.
BrainRightHeartWrong Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 takes me a while to get confortable with a girl and i think its always for the better if you wait until you both are confortable then it should just get better and better never hurry this step, you'll know when it is right!
SoleMate Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 Calm down. FOR GOD'S SAKE, CALM DOWN!!!!! I believe you have experienced a phenomenon known as "new partner anxiety". Read more about it at http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t44685/ . On the second go-round, you had new partner anxiety plus "performance anxiety" due to the previous episode. Both of these are quite common if you can get men to be honest about it. The "cure" is to calm down, relax, get to know your partner better, take it slow, and above all release all your uptight expectations about what you "must" do as a man to please your partner in bed. If you don't get hard, then you can engage in other activities (some of which, admittedly, take a bit more imagination and skill then just straight vanilla intercourse). Worrying makes it worse - relaxing and above all, focussing on your partner and her response will make it better. I think it would be rare for a woman to take this amiss - just don't freeze up and let this become a habit. Next time you are with her, tell yourself that there will be no intercourse, and instead you'll do everything but. Worst case, you'll both have a great time doing the "everything but"; best case, since you're not trying and expecting to get hard, it will happen more easily. You're normal.
Recommended Posts