Told me he loves me after 2 weeks of dating, I'm freaked out

[Sammills]

I just started talking to this guy 3 weeks ago, we have been dating officially for one week and last night he told me he loves me and that i mean a lot to him. We have not yet have had sex because i have a policy that i need to be in a stable committed relationship to have sex. We have fooled around and done everything but have sex. I was previously in a 4 year relationship and have only had sex with 2 other men. He however has had over 13 sexual partners and it makes me feel uncomfortable and inexperienced. Im not sure if he's saying all this stuff to just get in my pants or he he's in love with the idea of feeling in love. I think i love you is a serious thing. Should i keep putting off sex to see if he sticks around or should i have sex and hope for the best. He does however seem to be genuine when he expresses his feelings but I am quite inexperienced with dating and i could be falling for his tricks. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

We are both 23, I'm about to get out of college.

[Assasda]

OMG, you want us to tell you to have sex, or not have sex?

missy, you've gotta make some decisions on your own.

 

As far as him saying that he loves you so soon, its strange, and its completely natural to feel weird about that. He doesnt even KNOW you.

How can he love you?

 

Yeah, you should proceed with caution, and take things he says with a grain of salt.

If he loves you this quick, he could hate you next week

[Sammills]

lol im not asking if i should have sex with him (ill do that when I'm ready) I'm more curious about his behavior

[d0nnivain]

I'd tell him his early I love you is freaking you out. An EX of mine said it to me about then & I didn't like it.

 

If you want to have sex with him, go ahead. If you are not ready or it doesn't feel right, don't.

 

Two weeks would be a bit fast for me.

[Sammills]

I'd tell him his early I love you is freaking you out. An EX of mine said it to me about then & I didn't like it.

 

If you want to have sex with him, go ahead. If you are not ready or it doesn't feel right, don't.

 

Two weeks would be a bit fast for me.

I did tell him that I'm a little freaked out and he does not even know me yet. Im just really confused, I want to like him but its really putting me off to him when he says he loves me

[d0nnivain]

I'm an optomist. Until you get evidence to the contray take his declaration as a positive. See if that switch in your perception clarrifies anything.

 

Taking it as a positive doesn't mean close your eyes to the possibility that he's insincere & this is a ploy but it does mean trying to see the good rather than the bad.

[stateofgrace]

I just started talking to this guy 3 weeks ago, we have been dating officially for one week and last night he told me he loves me and that i mean a lot to him. We have not yet have had sex because i have a policy that i need to be in a stable committed relationship to have sex. We have fooled around and done everything but have sex. I was previously in a 4 year relationship and have only had sex with 2 other men. He however has had over 13 sexual partners and it makes me feel uncomfortable and inexperienced. Im not sure if he's saying all this stuff to just get in my pants or he he's in love with the idea of feeling in love. I think i love you is a serious thing. Should i keep putting off sex to see if he sticks around or should i have sex and hope for the best. He does however seem to be genuine when he expresses his feelings but I am quite inexperienced with dating and i could be falling for his tricks. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

We are both 23, I'm about to get out of college.

I was in a (sort of) similar situation as you. My current boyfriend and I were seeing each other for only a month and he asked me to be official and told me he loved me all in one night. I was totally freaked!! I wanted to take things slow as I had gotten out of a three year relationship about 7 months prior, but he was everything that I said I wanted in my next boyfriend and I didn't want to pass up something really great. However, I knew he wasn't saying it to get in my pants, because we slept together on the first date (whoops! hehe) We have a pretty intense connection, and hadn't been in a relationship for a few years, so I believe he mistook these intense feelings towards me as love. He said it a few other times shortly after, but it kind of just dropped off and we never spoke of it again...lol now things are better than ever and we will say it when we're both ready and when it's genuinely true.

 

As for your situation, two weeks is VERY soon. There's two options, either he is a genuine guy who did the same as mine who just mistook your connection for love too soon, OR he is a shady guy trying to get laid.. It depends on the connection that you have! You either need to talk to him about it and express your concerns, or have your guard up. Keep to your rule, if you don't want to sleep with him yet, then don't, and see if he sticks around. If he starts getting annoyed or tries to force it, you have your answer and you need to walk away. I hope everything works out for you, stick to your guns and listen to your gut!

[Gaeta]

That makes me laugh.

 

The few times a man told me he loved me after a couple of weeks I replied with: You mean if I need a kidney you will give me one? That usually puts things back into perspective. Infatuation is not love.

 

Stick to your original plan to wait for sex till you are comfortable in this relationship and ignore the I love you.

 

On a side note: If you don't want to have sex why are you doing 'everything else' ? You are already having sex with him, you just don't have intercourse. No sex means no sex. You think men can use you only for intercourse? Plenty of men using the ladies to get hand-jobs and BJ.

[Zahara]

I love you after dating for a week, 13 sexual partners which seems like he's no prude -- sounds a little slick to me.