HotCaliGirl Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 I was going to stay at my b-friend's place from Fri night - Mon morning as usual. Saturday night his pager was going off all night, he said it was for work. Then Sunday he says he has to go to work, and showers, dresses and leaves at 2pm to go to the office for an emergency - an hour before the Super Bowl we were planning on watching together. The hours go by and he doesn't even call to check up on me and I have never stayed at his place alone for that long. At 6:30pm I was fuming, wrote a note and took off - I live 60 miles away. At 7pm (super bowl was over around 7:10) he left a message on my cell phone that he would be heading back soon - his work is about 20 min away. I've known him for 5 years, we dated for about a year, then broke up for a year and a half and just got back together a month ago. Did he really go to work? I called and we spoke at 9pm - I had made an excuse why I had to suddenly leave - family emergency, and am feeling sorry he had to go in to work on that day - he's never gone in on a Sunday before and had mentioned Saturday that he was on-call even though it was his weekend off since his boss was taking a week off etc etc. If I question whether he was really at work, I know he will turn it on me that I don't trust him and it'll turn into a big bad fight that I don't want to get into... I was miserable when we were apart and am always feeling scared to rock the boat. I just feel very very hurt and disrespected and don't know what to think. How can I approach this matter without coming across that I don't trust him or that I am jealous? What if he went to watch the game with another girl or was too ashamed to take me to wherever he was with friends? What if he was really at work? How can I know if he was really at work? PLEASE help! I can't handle this. I am to see him Wed. night and don't know if I should be the bad one who left him and couldn't wait long enough for him to get back or if he was playing me...
DinNJ Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 you're not gonna know anything, so don't assume just yet. It's not worth it. BUT if stuff like this keeps happening, then I would open my eyes a little more. Yes, he probably should've been a little more courteous knowing damn well you were waiting for him, but he didn't. That's the only arguement you have right now. A phone call would've been nice.
Author HotCaliGirl Posted February 8, 2005 Author Posted February 8, 2005 Thanks Din - that is good advice and actually makes me feel better. My mind is racing thinking this and that, but if I just focus on what I DO know 100% - that I was hurt he didn't call at all to check up on me in the 4 1/2 hrs I sat waiting, then I can deal with an absolute issue or concern and won't risk anything that I may (and hope) be wrong about. In the meantime, I'll be extra careful as far as who he is saying he gets calls from...it's like my heart has been unscrewed with hurt oozing out and now I'll always be wondering about things in the back of my head...
DinNJ Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 I know the feeling.... and I understand the 4.5 hr wait. Just out of respect and knowing you were waiting, he should've called. But since that is all you have to go with, you can't let it mess with your mind and cause you to think the 'worst' But then again.... sometimes the 'gut feeling' is always the right one. At least with me it is.... don't be too suspicious, but don't be blind either.
FoShizzleMyNizzle Posted February 9, 2005 Posted February 9, 2005 Hmmm, it does look very suspicious... being called back to "WORK" on a Sunday.. an hour before the SUPERBOWL and then calls you back after the SUPERBOWL. Worst case scenario, he wanted to spend Superbowl watching with his buddies, not you. But he didn't want to include you for some reason he won't talk about. Either way, he is lying and should've told you that he was gonna watch the game with his buddies or something rather than make you obsess. Think this goes deeper than this, and I question why some people yearn to go back to their exes. I did it once and never again will I ever do that.
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