asanch Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 very hurt I believe i have fallen victim to G.I.G.S. need advise Hi my name is Al and im not even sure this is G.I.G.S...i want to know if it is here is my devastating story.... I have been in a 4 year relationship and was engaged and this ended yesterday very ugly....We had a great relationship no real problems that couldn't be work out, very healthy relationship. after about 2 1/2 year we got engaged everyone was super happy. the last couple of months we have been fighting n bickering about stupid things that i cant even think of...I am guilty of one thing that i see now in hindsight... basically she would tell me she did not think i was fully committed. she would tell me that she felt lonely. the fault I had is that I was very comfortable in the relationship and basically just shrugged it off as whatever or didn't think to much about it.. as time pasted she started going out with her new GF from work and thats when I began to see the change...at first it didn't bother me; but soon I began to see she would dismiss me for her going out with her GF..still she told me she loves me and could not wait for us to spend our lives together...the bickering for senseless things continued...and she began to go out more and more....we would still go out but....she would always have several plans with her new GF planned throughout the week..At this point I felt I was losing her which was about 2 weeks ago....Now i felt she was not as committed as before....last thursday we spent the day at the beach we had lunch and she stated"babe i know were going through a ruff time but we can get through this, our love is that strong"...the day ended great...the next couple of days feeling our relationship was on the edge I totally committed to her every need, talking about how awesome its gonna be when we are married ...about 48 hours later she started stating that she was confused, she doesn't know what she wants,,,she thinks she needs time to fix herself, but she is sure she wants to be together she loves me and that we are definitely getting married..that was this past saturday May 3, 2014...on sunday the next day we had lunch everything seemed ok but she was slightly distant at lunch i told her we should go out tonight have some fun and talk about things she stated she had plans to have dinner with her GF, i said don't you think with what is going on with us we should get together she said lets get together in the morning then go to the beach... not thinking much of it i said fine..... HERE COMES THE BOMB the next morning which was yesterday cinco de mayo 2014 I got to her house very early about 7 AM....here comes the kicker she wasn't home...called her phone was off....text her hey its your fiance where the f are you...no reply... contacted her GF she stated that after dinner she hung with another GF about 30 min later she drives in dresses from the night before didn't answer the phone cus battery was dead (they were i checked LOL). but she told me she stayed at the house of the GF i spoke to which was a lie.... she was basically dismissing me like if she didn't care i confronted her strongly and told her i knew she wasn't there...then she refused to speak with me like if i was someone she had never know finally she admitted she was with another man and said it was my fault for pushing her that way.... all the while just telling me to leave to get out of her house....she was being a bitch from He!!...i took my engagement ring which she handed over quickly i said a couple thing i didn't mean out of spite grabbed my pride and got out of dodge....... I am devastated as you can imagine...its only been 24 HR of course I am doing no contact....but just 2 HR ago she sent this ""I am very sorry i hurt you, I never wanted to get to this ugly place she said if her heart was100% she would have never started going out as much with her new GF, im tired of feeling lonely n depressed i believe everything happens for a reason i need to focus on myself i never felt you were totally committed to me and only you know the reason for that...she continue to state that she was super hurt she wishes this had never happened she loves me i am a great guy with a heart of gold and awesome BF she says she will be fine hopes that i will be OK is truly sorry loves and will always love me no matter what....anyway very long text but no apology for cheated....so i feel she doesn't care i am very hurt and numb.....but did not respond to text.....i need advise on my situation I don't think i can take her back but 4 years and an engagement is hard to just let go.... do you think this was GIGS ....just need advise i do love her....thanks
FredJones80 Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 She cheated on you, sucks for you but it doesn't sound like someone who is worth your time.
Maverick89 Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 I'm very sorry for this story man... I'm also sorry, but nobody here is going to be able for sure if she's having G.I.G.S or not... We don't know you, we don't know your story, your ex, etc... We could have different cultures which change the way we see this. I'm going to try to be as objective as I can... She cheated... and you were engaged... for all we know, you just dodged a bullet man... Sounds harsh but it's true... Can you imagine this would've happened to you while you were already married? maybe even with some kids on the way? At least that's a positive thing... The ride has just started my friend, and it's going to be very difficult to get over this... it requires a lot of time and effort to do this... I know you probably want to just lay on your bed and cry all day and night (I know, I've been there). Wat I would advise you to do is... disappear! Do not answer anything from here, no texts, no emails, no liking photos on facebook, instagran, no retweeting... you get where I'm going... Even if we could be from different cultures, and countries, etc... one size fits them all... she's going to try to ease her guilt and ease her new life into a new life style, which sadly I must say it's going to be a life without you... I hate to generalize like this, but it's true, if she loved you, at least a little, she's going to feel guilty and say things like 'don't hate me', 'I'm sorry', etc... (Sorry girls for this generalization).... You have to know that you can't answer any of these 'breadcrumbs'... no answering the 'how are you texts', etc... She can't have validation from you that this is the right thing... as long as you don't validate her decision, she's always going to have the doubt if she did or did not do the right thing... I'm not saying this because you're trying to get her back with this strategy... this is plain justice... even if you don't get her back and end up with a new girl, she can't go on her life and think she did good and that you're ok with her cheating... Now, cry everything you need to cry, talk about it in here, with friends, family, etc... people will help you and most important of all, you need to also help yourself... no stalking, no 'I want to know even if it hurts'... You need to start to get back to your older self, the person that this girl fell in love with, because, you were happy in the beginning, and you need to be happy again. I wish you the best of luck my friend, everybody here knows this is probably one of the worst pains that can be experienced in life, so we will be helping you in whatever way we can... 1
Strength in Healing Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 Lol "it's your fault I cheated" Few times do I truly use the C word and mean it, but this girl really is one. And then some. And then about 10x more. This here would be an example of a low IQ idiot who lacks empathy.
FredJones80 Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 instagran Is this where she turns up with a home made apple pie, in an instant
Recommended Posts