Frazzle Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 Long story short: I recently started volunteering and I met this girl. We talked and she's really nice and friendly. She let me know about various job opportunities because she knows I'm in the process of looking for a job. I asked for her number and told her she should take me to go eat around her area (an hour away from me) to which she said yes. When I called her to ask her to go hang out, she didn't pick up and later called back and said she was hanging out with her boyfriend. She suggested we get lunch at work instead so I don't have to drive far. So I took the hint and kept it friendly. Fast forward... she changed her work schedule so we didn't see each other anymore. I texted her and said we should get together to catch up one of these days to which she never replied. Therefore, I figured she wanted to avoid me. We stopped seeing each other for a couple of months. One day, I texted her out of the blue to ask her for some information about medical school since she's planning to go herself. She replied enthusiastically and said she was thinking about me and was planning to text me to see how I was doing. She offered to come in on the day I volunteered to help me more with medical school. As a result, we work together again. Since then, she still tells me about job opportunities. Recently, she told me about an opening and even offered to proofread my cover letter. I guess what I'm wondering is why is she still going out of her way to be nice to me when she knows I was interested in her. I know if I was in her shoes, I would be friendly but not nice to someone who likes me because I don't want to give them the wrong idea. Isn't this kind of leading me on? I mean I appreciate her kindness but I guess I'm just wondering what her motive is. Maybe she's just a nice person? Am I thinking too much?
todreaminblue Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 I have always helped friends write cover letters or proof read theirs ......both male and female....i even write them without ellipses which is extremely difficult.....:bunny:...if i know someone is looking for a job and i see something i would tell them ...... doesnt mean i am interested in dating them.......especially not if i was in a relationship i would not be interested in them in that way...if i was single and i liked the guy....maybe....... i think you should ask her one time how her boyfriend is....just an off the cuff question.....you should have your answer then.....best wishes...deb 1
d0nnivain Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 I don't see her doing anything extraordinary. She's being a good friend. She made that boundary very clear by telling you that she has a BF. You reached out again after that which she most likely took as a sign that you were OK with being friends. Now she is being your friend, nothing more.
sumathi Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 She is just being friendly and helpful. It is you who seems to have got the wrong idea. She avoided you because you gave the hint that you were interested in her. Her avoiding you clearly shows that she does not want you to have other ideas about her. But when you asked her about studies she was more than ready to help you. This shows that she will interact with you when you maintain a dignified distance from her.
topaMAXX Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 She sounds cray cray. You are giving her an ego boost. I would say keep talking to her if she's helping you with things, but don't look at her as a potential option anymore. And definitely don't wait for her to come around on her time.
Frank2thepoint Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 She established her boundary with you. She has a boyfriend. She was being nice to you because she wants to help with your possible career. She is just being friendly. Don't over think it. Just have her as a friend, nothing more.
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