Trixster Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 i just wanted to know the best way to get over a 2 year relationship! I was with my girlfriend for a long time and she has an 8-5 job and she goes to school from 6-930 and i worked while she was either at school or work. Ever sense school has started this last semester we have never really seen each other. I think the last time ive seen here was for 20 and that was after 6 days of not seeing her! I was getting really upset and i told her to start trying to see me more often but she said it was too hard for her. We here fighting for a lil while but then she finally said that she doesnt want a bf anymore until she was at least done with school. I didnt want that but there was nothing i could do. All i could think was that ill be there for her when school gets out in june. We broke up thursday... friday she went to the movies with some friends and some guy name matt went with them. i wanted to tell her about how i wanted to wait for her until school gets out cause i really wanted to be with her. But she had plans friday and was gonna be out of town saturday. We both agreed on sunday to talk so i could tell her. Sunday (last night) rolls around and im calling her all day. i sat outside of her house from 9-30 pm until midnight to find someone else drop her off... MATT! i go home and call her and ask her what that was all about she said it was nothing. i ask her if he liked her and she said yes... next question was do u like him... she said yes! turns out she first liked him on friday(the day after we broke up). she said she gets this uncontrolable feeling when shes around him. do u think she has liked him before? i need help does anyone have any suggestions... please!!!
very-confused-girl Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Why do you care whether she liked him BEFORE? Its not an issue here. She obviously has a crush on somebody else, thats what she technically has said - that she gets uncontrolable feeling when she´s around him. Ok so would you want to be with somebody who has crush on somebody else? She has some responsibilites like school, job, etc...which are stopping her to devote you her free time, but obviously the same responsibilities are not stopping her to see a different guy. She made the choice already, my friend. Now it is time for you to leave unless you are a masochist and want you heart to be broken even more. You deserve better!
Merin Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Damn.. Sorry Trixster:( Honestly.. yeah it seems like she's got all kinds of time now that the 2 of you are broke up to get out and see movies and socialize.. Do I think she liked this other guy Matt BEFORE breaking up with you.. Yeah I do.. I'm sorry. At this point I would cut off contact with her. Don't call her, email her, text her.. nothing. She has decided to make time for someone else in her life.. so yeah.. time to let go here. Best wishes
Author Trixster Posted February 7, 2005 Author Posted February 7, 2005 what sucks about the whole thing is that this has happened to me with just about every girlfriend i have had! any ideas?
acidrein_08 Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Gawd Merin, you know how to break it to us hard don't ya . The sorry touch is good though.
very-confused-girl Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 I dont know maybe you tend to be attracting the same type of girls - the ones who come to your life and then they got bored or whatever and leave. Maybe you are causing it subcounciously by your behaviour. Maybe you are too nice and look too vulnerable that girls dont wanna break it with you hard, they sort of trying to avoid you until you loose patience and leave them. But I dont know, I am just speculating. But I guess that when this happened with every girlfriend you have, it is either a bad luck and strange coincidence, or there really might be something about you whats causing it.
Merin Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Originally posted by acidrein_08 Gawd Merin, you know how to break it to us hard don't ya . The sorry touch is good though. I am sorry Acidrein.. it isn't a "touch" I just like to add in there.. When a relationship ends it sucks, when someone has the ability to make you feel sh*tty and question your reality.. it sucks. IF I really believed from what Trixster wrote that this girl was sincere.. OR that the other guy in question was just a friend, beleive me I would tell him that.. but that isn't what I think, and I'm not going to tell him what he wants to hear, because it won't help him. I know how it is to be in a not so great relationship.. and no matter how much you tell yourself that what the other person is doing is *Okay* the truth is if it makes YOU feel bad.. then yeah.. it isn't okay.
lostandlonely Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Trixster i understand how you feel, i was in a four year relationship which she ended as she "no longer loved me", a couple of days later i read her email (big mistake, the truth hurts) and found out that she'd had feelings for this other bloke for 6 months before we finished it. I was very upset at the time and it still hurts as i dont know what she sees in him. BUT it does get easier with time, its only been 2 weeks but i am begining to feel better. I still dont feel great about it and i dont think i ever will feel happy about it, but the fact is that we just have to accept these things and try and move on. Im not the best person to talk (see http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t56251/15-1?highlight= to see just how poorly im coping!), but i can say that already things are getting a bit better. I dont want to cry in public anymore, only when im on my own, so things are improving, and they will do for you to. I know that i'll probably get criticised for this, but it helps me at the moment to imagine myself being strong and nonchelant IF she ever came back ( I know she wont, but it helps right now). I suppose that visualising myself being strong makes me feel like i can be strong about it, it may be false hope but if you know it is then i dont see any harm if it helps you deal with it. You sound like a really nice guy (and a lot nicer than me), its horrible that she cant see this, but some one will some day. It will get better, good luck
Author Trixster Posted February 9, 2005 Author Posted February 9, 2005 well thanks everyone... i seem to be getting better each day... im not sad about it anymore and i could really give a S*** less about her life. i thinks she made a mistake and she has to deal with it. im going out more and i am talkin to a girl at my work. i just wanted to say thanks for your support.... the names adam by the way.
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