FlashNikkon Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 ok guys im kinda new to the forums here and i have a question i need help with. My friend who i have known for like a yr, but we are very close. Well shes been going out with this guy for 3 yrs and he has cheated one her like 5-7 times. Shes constantly upset about it but will not break up with him, Im not sure what to tell her or what to do, like im not syaing i want her to break up with him and go out with me just break up with him and go out with someone who makes her happy. Any Advice would be greatly appreciated ohh and if it matter, im a senior in highschool and shes a junior
Pocky Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 While she may know that she's dating someone that doesn't treat her well, the last thing she wants to hear is her friend telling her to end her relationship. Women can be obsessively loyal at times, so much so that she could say her boyfriend is an ass, but if anyone else were to say it, she'd defend him. You can't make her do anything she doesn't want to do and the more you come down on the relationship, the more you turn into the bad guy and push her to his side. Just go with the flow. She'll never end the relationship until she's ready to.
tanbark813 Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Originally posted by Pocky Women can be obsessively loyal at times... Can you point these out for me please? I seem to always end up with ones that are the exact opposite.
Merin Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 Originally posted by tanbark813 Can you point these out for me please? I seem to always end up with ones that are the exact opposite. << Is obsessively loyal :Merin kicks herself in the ass: Yes I was that girl who was loyal to someone who was nothing short of a complete assclown for almost 2 years.. all my friends hated him, my family hated him.. but no no no.. Merin kept seeing this guy anyway and as you know Tanbark I got a book with a title that was something like "Your BF is an a**hole.. how to deal with it" LOL I still think it's sad as hell that I actually bought a book on how to DEAL with an idiot.. for real.. is that a good idea? but yeah.. obviously there are people who are loyal like that.. even when it's bad for them
DinNJ Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 <------ was in love with an @sshole too. Jump out of the fire, jump back in, jump out, jump back.... why? NO self asteem and no self respect. It was THEN when I learned my lesson. People don't change, so we have to change ourselves. Sooner or later... YOUR friend will learn the lesson and won't want to hurt anymore. You helping her along will only drive her further from you and closer to him. Let her fall.
wvd Posted February 8, 2005 Posted February 8, 2005 i think excessive loyalty is a result of 2 things: having the "golden retriever (high in emotion, low in assertiveness )" personality type, and having low self-esteem. so low self-esteem isn't enough, they have to have strongly fit one specific of four personality types.
Author FlashNikkon Posted February 10, 2005 Author Posted February 10, 2005 ok guys thank you all for responding and helping me out, i think ill take ur advice since almost all of u said to just stay out of it and let her do it.
Recommended Posts