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ex's birthday is this friday.

greenfairie

By greenfairie
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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greenfairie Established Member

greenfairie

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would you text him happy birthday or not?

TylerDurdenn Established Member

TylerDurdenn

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No it's just another day.

 

Why does everyone on this forum make such a big deal over birthdays?

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David87 Established Member

David87

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No, don't text him. You're not together anymore so it doesn't matter.

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greenfairie Established Member

greenfairie

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No it's just another day.

 

Why does everyone on this forum make such a big deal over birthdays?

 

Um, are you joking? An ex was once a huge part of my life, especially if one lasted from a young age like say middle school throughout college. Even if I'm still not with him, I still care about him as a person.

Simon Phoenix Established Member

Simon Phoenix

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It's my birthday on Friday, so just message me instead.

 

Um, are you joking? An ex was once a huge part of my life, especially if one lasted from a young age like say middle school throughout college. Even if I'm still not with him, I still care about him as a person.

 

On a serious note, the key word here is was, as in past tense, as in not currently.

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TylerDurdenn Established Member

TylerDurdenn

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Um, are you joking? An ex was once a huge part of my life, especially if one lasted from a young age like say middle school throughout college. Even if I'm still not with him, I still care about him as a person.

 

Just let go.

zen2475 Established Member

zen2475

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I would not. I know you care about him and he was a big part of your life, but the important thing to remember is that he is no longer.

 

 

Don't give to him when he probably isn't giving to you.

 

 

I would think right now you would send that wish with some expectation, and that will only cause you disappointment.

 

 

The most important thing is to protect your heart.

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Ordinaryday Established Member

Ordinaryday

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if you are the dumper then texting him is just breadcrumbs and cruel. he may get his hopes up upon hearing from you that you want to reconcile, and when he realises that all you wanted to say was "happy birthday" and then go on your merry way, well it will be like being dumped all over again. why would a dumper do that, cruel.

 

and if you are the dumpee then sorry to break this to you but when they dumped you they basically said they dont want you in their life anymore. that ESPECIALLY includes special occasions like birthdays.

 

so in both cases... no!

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Confusedbylove Member

Confusedbylove

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Dear god no, its literally another day on the calendar. Don't make such a big deal about it.

Always Pondering Established Member

Always Pondering

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You probably shouldn't do that, especially if you're the dumper and he hasn't moved on yet.

 

Unless both parties are indifferent to each other and/or have moved on, I would advise against wishing him a happy birthday. Ordinaryday pretty much nailed it.

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Elle1975 Established Member

Elle1975

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would you text him happy birthday or not?

 

Dumper: no. It's cruel, even if you see it as a nice gesture.

Dumpee: hell no, why put yourself in that situation.

 

My ex's bd is coming up in June. Oh I will wish happy birthday alright; I will go spend money on something for.. me. And call it a day.

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elseaacych Established Member

elseaacych

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You probably shouldn't do that, especially if you're the dumper and he hasn't moved on yet.

 

Unless both parties are indifferent to each other and/or have moved on, I would advise against wishing him a happy birthday. Ordinaryday pretty much nailed it.

 

If you're indifferent to him, you wouldn't wish him a happy birthday anyway.

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KaliLove Established Member

KaliLove

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My ex wished me a happy birthday. He even sent me a birthday gift (though it arrived late..just got it on Saturday). I really wish he hadn't. I felt worse after that..although I'm fine now. But I think I am much further along in my break up than you.

 

He was the dumper.

Always Pondering Established Member

Always Pondering

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If you're indifferent to him, you wouldn't wish him a happy birthday anyway.

 

Yeah, I forgot to mention that :laugh:.

 

It's like the exes that I have gotten over and do not talk to anymore. I don't think I've ever wished them a happy birthday since and honestly do not know when their birthday is. I just don't think about it.

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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very soon after a break up I would be very tempted to send birthday wishes especially in an easy way like through a text or on FB. You can't give in to the temptation though b/c sending that message is not a good thing to do. Be strong . . . post here instead.

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flyingfree_hope Member

flyingfree_hope

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no you shouldn't.

before the birthday, I was desperately hoping that my ex (the dumper) would send me a birthday msg.

But when the day dropped by and he did send a birthday msg to me, I felt devastated and my heart was torn apart. I felt like that was so cruel of him as if he obviously didn't know how painful it was going through all these disasters, and for him to leave me for the girl; and also how he could just intrude my life out of a sudden and then leave again….

so no please don't send it.

Chi townD Established Member

Chi townD

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Who was the dumper and who was the dumpee?

FredJones80 Established Member

FredJones80

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no you shouldn't.

before the birthday, I was desperately hoping that my ex (the dumper) would send me a birthday msg.

But when the day dropped by and he did send a birthday msg to me, I felt devastated and my heart was torn apart. I felt like that was so cruel of him as if he obviously didn't know how painful it was going through all these disasters, and for him to leave me for the girl; and also how he could just intrude my life out of a sudden and then leave again….

so no please don't send it.

 

Did you reply to it?

BC1980 Established Member

BC1980

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Um, are you joking? An ex was once a huge part of my life, especially if one lasted from a young age like say middle school throughout college. Even if I'm still not with him, I still care about him as a person.

 

Are you going to text him happy birthday for the rest of his life? You have to think of it that way. There's no point in texting an ex happy birthday. Just cut it all off at once, and be done with it. Rip it off like a bandaid.

 

You've been broken up for awhile if I am correct. Delete his number from your phone. Apparently, you didn't mean that much to him if he broke up with you. Sorry, but it's the truth we all have to face. Your history together wasn't that special to him, so I would say that he doesn't need a happy birthday from you.

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FredJones80 Established Member

FredJones80

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Are you going to text him happy birthday for the rest of his life? You have to think of it that way. There's no point in texting an ex happy birthday. Just cut it all off at once, and be done with it. Rip it off like a bandaid.

 

You've been broken up for awhile if I am correct. Delete his number from your phone. Apparently, you didn't mean that much to him if he broke up with you. Sorry, but it's the truth we all have to face. Your history together wasn't that special to him, so I would say that he doesn't need a happy birthday from you.

 

Your advice is clean cut and I like it.

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melell Established Member

melell

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If you are speaking with a person regularly, you should wish them happy birthday. If you are not speaking regularly, then you shouldn't.

 

You shouldn't be speaking to an ex regularly.

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Mr.Pine Established Member

Mr.Pine

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Um, are you joking? An ex was once a huge part of my life, especially if one lasted from a young age like say middle school throughout college. Even if I'm still not with him, I still care about him as a person.

 

Here we go again... another poster who refuses to listen to reason and gets uber upset when they don't get the answer they want.

 

Greeny, you answered your own question. [My] ex was once a huge part of my life and I'm still not with him. Your first comment suggest he is in the past. The second comment strongly suggests you won't be back with him in the future.

 

Why ask us a question if you're going to get hostile with our responses.

 

Here's what you do... do what the fook you want, because you're going to do what the fook you want, regardless.

 

I returned for this?

flyingfree_hope Member

flyingfree_hope

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Did you reply to it?

 

 

nah...can't be bothered after what he did to me lol

KaliLove Established Member

KaliLove

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Um, are you joking? An ex was once a huge part of my life, especially if one lasted from a young age like say middle school throughout college. Even if I'm still not with him, I still care about him as a person.

 

WAS being the operative word here. He WAS a big part of your life. He is no longer a big part of your life, so no, you don't need to wish him a happy birthday.

  • Like 1
Lalasita Member

Lalasita

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It doesn't matter because you are not together anymore.

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