SCJACK Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Does it matter if I deleted/deactivated my fb or blocked her? Right now I have it deleted and I find there is no need to get back on since I am tired of social media anyways. Do both have the same effects or is one greater than the other? Recently I felt like just unfriending her because I feel like I want to give a "fk you, I don't wanna be friends" kind of deal. I, like many people still haven't blocked/unfriended because I care about what she thinks of me and I know I shouldn't. I just can't shake the feeling of when I actually do unfriend her that she wouldn't ever want to talk to me again or something. Stupiddd right? If both have the same effects though than I'll just keep it deactivated.. until i'm over it.
elseaacych Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 It's facebook. It's not a big deal if you don't make it a big deal. And you're not supposed to talk to each other. You're broken up. 1
barky2 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Questions like this have zero impact on anything in the real world. In the grand scheme of things....it simply doesn't matter if you turn right or left, ran or walked, sneezed or farted....it just doesn't matter. Stop driving yourself crazy with these questions. Barky 3
saltyfishhead666 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Does it matter if I deleted/deactivated my fb or blocked her? Right now I have it deleted and I find there is no need to get back on since I am tired of social media anyways. Do both have the same effects or is one greater than the other? Recently I felt like just unfriending her because I feel like I want to give a "fk you, I don't wanna be friends" kind of deal. I, like many people still haven't blocked/unfriended because I care about what she thinks of me and I know I shouldn't. I just can't shake the feeling of when I actually do unfriend her that she wouldn't ever want to talk to me again or something. Stupiddd right? If both have the same effects though than I'll just keep it deactivated.. until i'm over it. I deleted my account . Took a few months to convince myself but I did I. I couldn't bare to see he had the balls to ignore me but it still said we were happily engaged. I felt relieved after and I still do now
saltyfishhead666 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Questions like this have zero impact on anything in the real world. In the grand scheme of things....it simply doesn't matter if you turn right or left, ran or walked, sneezed or farted....it just doesn't matter. Stop driving yourself crazy with these questions. Barky And this guy is amazing!!!!! If you don't listen to him you'll regret it. Nice to see you barky 1
ebt100 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 If you deactivate your account, you will show up as a grey silhouette in her friends list, and she can still defriend you. Although, she can't see your profile. If you DELETED your account, your account is gone from facebook, and all posts/connections have been severed. Yes, this would be same effect as blocking. If you BLOCK her, all your connections/wall posts/etc are removed, and she cannot search for you or access anything about you, or see stories relating to you in her news feed. I had a similar problem. I knew I should defriend her (wouldn't have blocked... that is just childish and harsh). Luckily for me, she defriended then blocked me. It is relieving not having the temptation to see her posts, etc. And I'm glad it wasn't me who did it, because I--like you--would have wondered about the message it sent. I agree that it is not a "big deal." Technically, it means very little in the big scheme. You still are embedded in each other's memories. The one caveat is that not being in each others news feeds means there will be less reminders of one another.
Always Pondering Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Yeah, it's really not a big deal as some people make it to be. I started out blocking my ex post-BU for a good while and then once I started making progress with healing, I unblocked her. Did it change anything? No. Then why did I do it? I felt strong enough to do so and did not like the idea of having someone blocked because it is like hating the person. I haven't checked my ex's profile or anything of the sort in months so having her blocked or whatever doesn't impact me at all. Do what you see fit.
FredJones80 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 I think the problem is, a lot of people are connected, even if you never realised and an ex can pop up at any point when using social media. The solution is, remove yourself completely and get back to the real world The bonus is, they can't check up on your life either, I'm sure people get dumped for very valid reasons (in the dumpers mind) so why should they have the luxury to "check up" on you every so often to see how you're doing. Don't want me in your life? you get nothing. Bitter? ... probably 2
ebt100 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Yeah, in my case the person had "restricted" me when she got "angry" with me. Then, she unrestricted me, then did it back again when she got "angry" again. What that amounted to was that she could see my profile and updates, but when I clicked on hers all I saw was a blank page with her photo and timeline cover photo. The imbalance alone of that started to bug me.
barky2 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 And this guy is amazing!!!!! If you don't listen to him you'll regret it. Nice to see you barky Still making me blush! Nice to see you too Barky
Simon Phoenix Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Honestly, it doesn't matter what her perspective is on any of it. You need to do whatever you need to do to make yourself feel better individually. If you want to deactivate or delete and not go on social media, go for it. If you want to be on it but not have to see her updates, either delete her, block her, or at the bare minimum block her news feed. If you don't want her to see what you're doing, then delete/block her. Either way, it's what you are comfortable with. Don't base your decision on what her reaction could be, because honestly, she probably doesn't care at all right now what you do. And if she really wants to get back with you at a later date, what you do now with social media won't mean squat. Cliffs: You need to do you, not worry about her. 1
Natsume21 Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Didn't read too clearly. Didn't need to. Point blank, if anything on social media is bothering you or making you miserable, including said ex, block them, do whatever you feel is necessary to do it. You need to heal ASAP But Bark's right, years from now this **** won't ever matter. Live life and prosper. Do whatcha gotta do. But it's just social media. It ain't gonna kill ya.
bluegreen Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Still making me blush! Nice to see you too Barky Awww he is blushing how cute did not knew guys still do that 1
FortunateSon Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 I blocked ex because she kept blocking and unblocking me(probably to check up in me), I only know this because old pics and posts showed up would show up when unblocked. I took it upon myself to block her while I was "unblocked" for the 2 day period or whatever and haven't looked back. It is a huge relief not to worry about seeing her on there anymore and I also like the fact she cannot keep tabs on me. Blocking her is one of the most helpful things I have done post BU.
Emptynesswithouther Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 I blocked my ex on fb and protected my tweets on twitter. It has made me feel a lil better but this has been day 1, the hardest thing for me is to stop stalking her instagram. She does not know my name so can`t stalk me on their bt she use to stalk on twitter. I know this because she told me a few days ago when she so called wanted to check up on me, and my dumb a** broke NC. I got fed breadcrums lol. And I thought afterward I was cool cause we only talked about how we forgave one another, lol I was in denial like an hour later I felt dumb, im like "DAMN" I should have never answered smh. That alien encounter was like 4 or 5 days ago, then after that it was NC for 3 days then I texted her about my hoodie she barrowed and never gave back. Im irritated to say the least cause she promised she would bring it today, this the second time she lied about bringing my my stuff "STILL A NO SHOW" but I told my bro and he just said if she does not bring it today count it as a loss and move on. I would like to know why is she holding in to my stuff idk, oh well F` it! BTW TEAM LESBIAN:)
ahthepain Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 I defreiended straight away however I found that I would still visit her page where you can see profile picture updates and visit our mutual friend pages to see what she had been upto. It wasn't productive in helping me move forward. She got with a new guy a few weeks after our 3 year relationship ended and that's when I chose to block her as I didn't want to be tempted to see her with him. Even though I could just view her profile picture or page from another account or even find a friend willing to let me look I find that I havn't once had the massive urge. Not sure why, I thought it would be there on my mind. But yeah i would defo recommend blocking her. She chose to shatter your world and not break your heart, I really don't think she will mind if you try to move on and if she does ... well ... 1
Author SCJACK Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 OKAY guys... I just did it.... I removed her from my facebook.... it hurt to do it... i whispered "i'm sorry..." before I did it because I still deeply care for her. But it's for the best... In the process I broke NC.. a status I read pissed me off. it said "love me when i least deserve it because that's when i really need it" it just screamed i'm immature and i'm selfish and even when I kicked you in the balls and left you in the dirt i want you to love me.. another status said i'm over you!! idk if she was talking about me she posted it a week ago... but I guess it doesn't matter now..
saltyfishhead666 Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 Awww he is blushing how cute did not knew guys still do that :lmao: 1
saltyfishhead666 Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 OKAY guys... I just did it.... I removed her from my facebook.... it hurt to do it... i whispered "i'm sorry..." before I did it because I still deeply care for her. But it's for the best... In the process I broke NC.. a status I read pissed me off. it said "love me when i least deserve it because that's when i really need it" it just screamed i'm immature and i'm selfish and even when I kicked you in the balls and left you in the dirt i want you to love me.. another status said i'm over you!! idk if she was talking about me she posted it a week ago... but I guess it doesn't matter now.. Well done you!! Now give yourself a pat on the back and grab a beer!
Always Pondering Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 OKAY guys... I just did it.... I removed her from my facebook.... it hurt to do it... i whispered "i'm sorry..." before I did it because I still deeply care for her. But it's for the best... In the process I broke NC.. a status I read pissed me off. it said "love me when i least deserve it because that's when i really need it" it just screamed i'm immature and i'm selfish and even when I kicked you in the balls and left you in the dirt i want you to love me.. another status said i'm over you!! idk if she was talking about me she posted it a week ago... but I guess it doesn't matter now.. Good job on removing her (and blocking if you did)! I feel she's trying to send a message with that status, otherwise I doubt she'd post that. I have never once posted a status that said that when I was really over someone. Maybe she's trying to piss you off who knows, who cares. Regardless, you are right in that it doesn't matter anymore. She's out of your life, you're out of hers, so go enjoy your new-found time with yourself and friends.
malin819 Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 OKAY guys... I just did it.... I removed her from my facebook.... it hurt to do it... i whispered "i'm sorry..." before I did it because I still deeply care for her. But it's for the best... In the process I broke NC.. a status I read pissed me off. it said "love me when i least deserve it because that's when i really need it" it just screamed i'm immature and i'm selfish and even when I kicked you in the balls and left you in the dirt i want you to love me.. another status said i'm over you!! idk if she was talking about me she posted it a week ago... but I guess it doesn't matter now.. Pain will only be temporary and even then you don't want to know what she is up to. Social Medias...its like people putting a mask on every posts 1
Author SCJACK Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 Well done you!! Now give yourself a pat on the back and grab a beer! I can't drink beer unfortunately.. health :/ god my life sucks!! D:
Author SCJACK Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 Good job on removing her (and blocking if you did)! I feel she's trying to send a message with that status, otherwise I doubt she'd post that. I have never once posted a status that said that when I was really over someone. Maybe she's trying to piss you off who knows, who cares. Regardless, you are right in that it doesn't matter anymore. She's out of your life, you're out of hers, so go enjoy your new-found time with yourself and friends. If she wanted to piss me off, why would she do that? Kind of stupid. She's trying to play games... ain't nobody got time for dat!
Black Knight Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 Hey, I know it can be hard if you want to move on, but you have to make your mind up to do that. Whether you speak to her or not that is not the issue, I think the issue is maybe you may still have feelings for her. If that is the case maybe try to get back together or if I am wrong let it go. Like the songs says "you have to let it go". I have broken some hearts before and I have had my broken a couple of times and it is not easy no matter what side of the fence you are on. What matters is that you heal from the hurt and become stronger and better by it and move on. No regrets and no hard feelings but keep it movin. In time you feel like you again and you will see how far you have moved on and made progress.
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