Frivolous Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 I have just started talking to a women 11 years older than me (she's 38) on Tinder. Since it is not "normal" to have this much of an age gap I am wondering what her intent is. Ladies around this age, do you think that she would just be after a hookup? I just can't imagine that somone, especially a lady would want to properly date someone 11 years younger? I don't know how to play it? She is attractive so I'm interested but just wondered.
Gaeta Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 I have just started talking to a women 11 years older than me (she's 38) on Tinder. Since it is not "normal" to have this much of an age gap I am wondering what her intent is. Ladies around this age, do you think that she would just be after a hookup? I just can't imagine that somone, especially a lady would want to properly date someone 11 years younger? I don't know how to play it? She is attractive so I'm interested but just wondered. It's not a matter of age but a matter of person. You need to ask her what she's on Tinder for. My daughter's best friend is 27 and has been dating a woman 16 years older than him for 2 years now. I am dating someone 12 years younger. There are players of all ages, and people looking for serious relationship of all ages. 4
todreaminblue Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 I understand why you might feel that way but i would say the chances of an older woman wanting a hook up would probably be the same as a younger woman who wanted a hook up, casual sex isnt age defined I think the only way you can find out without directly asking her what she wants is to know her values on casual sex......and then to know your own .....an older woman would not want to have casual sex with someone who was looking for commitment or didn't want casual sex and vice versa i am going by a guess this woman is a decent person and you have on tinder or wherever you met her what you are looking for in a woman...... does tinder have a profile system????? what does hers say about her..... i dont know if it does because i have never been on it....im too prehistoric for snap chat and tinder...my teens have enlightened me to those words.....i dont really even get on facebook but to stalk my daughters i tend to meet dates out and about and know them a bit first.......know what they stand for.....thats my era the best person to ask this question is to her directly.......i wish you well....deb
Author Frivolous Posted May 4, 2014 Author Posted May 4, 2014 Thanks! I feel a bit awkward about asking things staright off the bat so guess it will take a meeting to see assess the situation. I mean if i just say why are you on Tinder she will probably think I am after casual sex right? I dove straight in and asked if she wanted to meet tomorrow but she was busy but said she was free today which im not unfortunately. The one other awkward thing about this scenario is that i don't want to date someone who has kids already so maybe i should ask that before meeting her? I said we will have to9 meet another day and she said we must i seem like a nice guy which tells me she isnt just looking for a hookup
Gaeta Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Thanks! I feel a bit awkward about asking things staright off the bat so guess it will take a meeting to see assess the situation. I mean if i just say why are you on Tinder she will probably think I am after casual sex right? I am used to online dating and that is the first question I ask. No time to waste meeting men that just want to hook up. In my experience people that ask straight up are the serious ones. The one other awkward thing about this scenario is that i don't want to date someone who has kids already so maybe i should ask that before meeting her? Yes, again why waste your time if having children is non negotiable with you.
Author Frivolous Posted May 4, 2014 Author Posted May 4, 2014 I am used to online dating and that is the first question I ask. No time to waste meeting men that just want to hook up. In my experience people that ask straight up are the serious ones. Yes, again why waste your time if having children is non negotiable with you. Point taken! I just sent a message asking what she is looking for and if she has kids. It just feels awkward asking a complete stranger that! Like so full on but suppose no point beating around the bush. 1
Author Frivolous Posted May 4, 2014 Author Posted May 4, 2014 I said it would be a bit much for me to date someone with children and she just replied with "thats fine" Guess that's the end to that love story!
SpringBaby Posted May 6, 2014 Posted May 6, 2014 I said it would be a bit much for me to date someone with children and she just replied with "thats fine" Guess that's the end to that love story! At least you know. I don't know what Tinder is but my ex was 11 years younger than me and he was a great love in my life. So moving forward don't be wary of older women. There's no guarantee with anyone no matter the age or anything else. To quote Frasier Crane lol "Love is always a risk, but you have to take it." All the best.
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