GAINING STRENGTH Posted February 20, 2005 Posted February 20, 2005 HEY IVE BEEN FOLLOWING YOUR STORY AND IT WAS IRONIC BECAUSE I AM GOING THROUGH THE SAME THING I DONT UNDERSTAND THIS SPACE THING I THINK THAT THE MORE I WAIT THE MORE TIME IM GIVING THEM TO GET OVER ME BUT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN OUR SITUATIONS IS THAT I WAS THE ONE CALLING AND BEGGING AND CRYING AND THEY NEVER CALLED.NOW IM FINALLY DOING THIS SPACE THING AND I DONT KNOW WHAT TO THINK ANY MORE.IM GLAD YOU SAY YOUR DOING GOOD.I WISH YOU LUCK I MYSELF AMDOING ALRIGHT BUT I DO MISS THEM ALOT AND I ASKED THEM THE LAST TIME I TALKED TO THEM IF THEY WERE OVER ME AND THEY SAID"I DON'T KNOW IF I AM OVER YOU AND I DONT KNOW IF IM NOT OVER YOU" I WAS LIKE OK WHAT DOES THAT MEAN BUT I DIDNTASK THEM THAT THAT WAS JUST GOING THROUGH MY MIND.WHAT DO U THINK IT MEANT?
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 20, 2005 Author Posted February 20, 2005 It sounds like she is really confused right now and you just need to give her some space and time and then maybe she'll come around. It's hard to sit and think about the reasons it happened, and what your losing but trust me, there are others out there that will make you feel the same way or even better. Respect how she feels and get out with your friends and have some fun. No matter what you have to move on and realize that there is life without her. It's up to her to initiate contact with you, so no matter how HARD it is, and I know its hard, DON'T contact her! Stay busy and don't think about her. Good luck to you.
upsetnhurt Posted February 20, 2005 Posted February 20, 2005 Where did the old acid go? It seems like you have really turned the corner in terms of your mindset. I hope it sticks!
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 21, 2005 Author Posted February 21, 2005 She just left my house. I came home from playing ball with my friends and her car was in my driveway. I come inside and she is sitting and talking to my parents! So she comes upstairs and I ask her what's going on. She said she came to get her ring and stuff so I was like oh. I was really strong, she told me how she been doing and I told her I been doing good and we didn't talk any about our relationship. She said to stay occupied (thats how she doesn't think about me) and I told her I didn't need any pointers. She said well she guess she going to go and I said ok, so she got up looked at me real funny, I stayed sitting, then she turned and left. Outside she looked back at me through the window. You all I am hurt again, this has opened my wound up and I am really down. I wanted to just hold her, tell her I love her, but I didn't say anything. She asked if I had anything to say and I told her I didn't. Damn depression.
davedawgaz Posted February 21, 2005 Posted February 21, 2005 Hey. you have to realize there was more to it than just getting her ring. She obviously wanted to see you or she would have just called and asked for them. Look, you did a good job by being strong. Do what you know will be the best for you and your future. But I am impressed with how strong you were. I understand completly what you are going through. I herd a song today that we always sang together and I got all sad. It was that Alecia Keys song, Want It All. I thought about calling but I didn't. I realized that when she hears that song I am sure she feels the same way. So I am sure that she really misses you, but it is hard to understand why she doesn't act on it. Just stay busy, i promise you will be OKAY.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 22, 2005 Author Posted February 22, 2005 She forwarded me an email entitled I LUV YOU really late last night. She never forwarded anything while we were together. I have not contacted her or wrote her back, even though I really want to I know that definently wouldn't be a smart thing to do becuase I would be playing right back into her hands. A part of me has moved on from her and I know deep down I will be ok if we don't get back together. Becuase I accepted that last week. But since last night I think there might be a chance she will call or something, what should I do? Should I even hope?
davedawgaz Posted February 22, 2005 Posted February 22, 2005 It seems like she is just playing with your heart. I am jealous of you in a way. Like we all said if you give her space she would come around, just do it a little more. Don't set any of your ideas in stone. Just do what you have been doing and let things work themselves out. I am impressed with how strong you are being. Keep it up.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 24, 2005 Author Posted February 24, 2005 Well last night I was on the phone with one of my friends (a girl) and we were talking about me and my ex. I was telling her exactly what has happened and asked her what she thought about it since she personally knew us both and knew our situation I thought it would be better for her input than someone who doesn't exactly know whats up. She thought it was good at what i've been doing but thought I should call her and see what's up. That is exactly what I did today. We talked for almost 2 hours. When we first got on we both were happy and just talked about school and family and stuff. Then I asked her if she had anything to say and she didn't. So I was like okay, i'll let you go and she is like 'why?'. I said I was busy but then she asked me if I had anything to say and really sounded interested. So I said there is tons of things that I want to say and I wanted to say Sunday when you were here, I just can't. But eventually we both really started talking about our relationship and what we have learned over our break up. I told her I really believe that breaking up has been the best thing for us no matter if we get back together someday or not. She told me she was sorry for things she did and we agreed that we had stopped being ourselves and tried being what the other wanted us to be in the later part of our relationship. We were happy the whole time and we talked about thinking about each other and about the email I had wrote her. Before we got off I asked her if she would read the email again (I don't think she got the last part becuase she didn't see it last time) and to read a poem I wrote her once called It's Not To Late, and she said she definently will. Then I said well the next time I talk to you I don't want you to be mean and say why are you calling and she said she is only like that when I start asking why when she said I already knew (which I do). I asked her if she wanted me to do anything and she said always keep our picture (we kept a big album together) and I said i'd always have them. Then I told her she better go before she late for her class and she laughed and said ok, then we got off. Need input on whether my decision was right?
upsetnhurt Posted February 24, 2005 Posted February 24, 2005 It doesn't matter if it was right or wrong to us, how do you feel? That is most important. Our concerns are with you Acid, not her. I fear that you are trying to "talk the talk" in saying you have moved on........and unfortunately you hold out this hope that by talking with her that she will become convinced that you are right together. If that is the thought deep inside you, you will be disappointed and eventually get angry with her lack of initiative towards you. You will then fight and push her farther away.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 25, 2005 Author Posted February 25, 2005 Hey upset, I thought you would jump on me but your post was very positive and I appreciate it. I called her just a few minutes ago at work and she was so excited to hear from me, she was like how my night been going and she said she couldn't believe I called and I aksed if it was a good thing and she says of coarse and then I ask if I was buggin her and she said I could never bug her. So I told her to have a good night at work and she told me to do the same and wished me luck on a paper I have to write for school. Then we got off happy. I am not going to get my hopes up, but am thinking maybe no contact for a week or so made her realize some things and I think things might be looking up for me. Either way i'm going to go on tomorrow and keep being myself and looking for girls, but i'm enjoyin this.
upsetnhurt Posted February 25, 2005 Posted February 25, 2005 Acid, I would never get on you, we all just want you to be happy in life. How would you feel if she does not contact you for a week or maybe a month? Make sure that your life is good right now because you are moving on and not because you are gaining hope that she might come back and be the woman you thought she was. She left you for reasons that take a bit more than a few weeks to resolve and I would be fearful if she did come back quickly that it would be for the wrong reasons, lonliness in particular and the need for your attention, not love. Be careful and good luck.
Mr Butterfly Posted February 25, 2005 Posted February 25, 2005 Break-upos are very sad, had a couple myself. The quickest way to ensure you stay broken up is to run after them at every turn. It is so difficult to think straight and you convince yourself that if you say "This" or if you say "That" she is going to melt in your arms and come back to you. The truth is the best thing you can do is totally ingnore her as if YOU don't care. It doesn't stop you from being nice to her if she contact you, but what you should do is have a good hard look at yourself and ask why did she leave me. Very few women leave a man becuase she has met someone else is, usually she feel neglegted, let down or unsecure. Wait till she contacts you be nice then email her but only do it if you can change and be what she needs in her life. If you can't and you must be honest with your self, get out your fishing rod and go drop it in another lake and next time you might catch one that you appreciate so much she wont have anything to complain about. My only wish is that I could take my own advice :0) I have read some sad stories on here but mines would bring tears to a galss eye. When I have more time I will tell you my tale of woe. Tell you what guys, everything has a happy ending and time is a great healer trust me on that.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 27, 2005 Author Posted February 27, 2005 I have not talked to her since the last time I mentioned and don't plan on it. I have started talking to more girls but the ones I have picked all have had boyfriends so far, but its still a moral victory every time I go up and approach them they have all been friendly and we have had some long conversations. But here comes the big question I need some feedback on. I am thinking about taking a job in Florida (I currently reside in Kentucky) as a police officer (have been attending college for 2 years in criminal justice). My brother and sister live in Florida and I lived there till I was eleven before I moved here to Kentucky. (I am 19) Would it be something to look into or am I just thinking about leaving becuase of this past breakup. I honestly think it would be good to get away for a few years and maybe move back up here later. The reason I have to move to Florida (which I love btw) is becuase its the only state with the legal age being 19, all the other states require you to be 21. So what do you all think if I haven't confused you?
Author acidrein_08 Posted March 4, 2005 Author Posted March 4, 2005 Wow I have been doing good and have kept myself busy and having fun with friends but I took a serious blow tonight when one of my friends texted me and said they saw my ex with her b/f. I was pissed that they even texted me that and didn't text them back. I am not an emotional wreck or anything, I am calm and still alright but it hurts some knowing her reasons were all lies and it really changes my whole outlook on her. Please I need some encouragement right now.
Baby Posted March 6, 2005 Posted March 6, 2005 A change of place, environment, will do you world of good. New challenges and excitement always sometin to keep your mind off her.. I d say..go for it! you have a whole life ahead of you
Author acidrein_08 Posted March 7, 2005 Author Posted March 7, 2005 I'm sorry but I was misinformed on my last post, the girl who I talked to told me she was talking about one of the new girls I was looking into who had a boyfriend and referred to her as my woman. So my ex as far as I know is still single. But anyways I was needing to ask another question. I am needing 7 references for the job and am wanting to use her as one. So would it be a good idea just to call and ask her if I could use her as a reference and then thank her and get off?
Author acidrein_08 Posted March 8, 2005 Author Posted March 8, 2005 Wow you all where are the posts? I went ahead and called her about an hour ago and said what's up. Then I asked her if I could use her as a reference and she said for what job? I told her it wasn't important and she said yeah I could and I told her thanks. Then I was about to get off and she said she had seen me the other day with her hat on, and the night b4 that with it on too at the Cadillac (a club) and I said yeah, then she said bye and I said seeya. Well I roll over, mission accomplished but like 30 minutes later she calls back! She was wanting to know what job it was I was looking into and I told her it was no big deal a few times, then she talked about seeing me again and I told her not to say nothing bad about me in the reference and she said she never would. I tried to get off the phone and she persisted as to where I was applying, nicely though and I kept telling her I didn't want to tell her in case it didn't work out, but I finally gave in and told her. She was like St Petersburg, where is that..and I said Florida. She said good luck to me, and that she would give a good reference, and I said thanks, then seeya, she said good luck again and I said bye again and she said bye. Then we got off. I was feeling perfect after the first conversation and didn't want to tell her where I was going, damnit.
Author acidrein_08 Posted March 10, 2005 Author Posted March 10, 2005 I didn't answer it, didn't want to and she didn't leave a message. So what does this mean?
Author acidrein_08 Posted March 10, 2005 Author Posted March 10, 2005 Someone respond asap on what I need to do! I didn't answer it
upsetnhurt Posted March 11, 2005 Posted March 11, 2005 Acid, Sometimes you sound so smart...others I tend to question it..... What do you mean what should you do........NOTHING!
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