Merin Posted February 12, 2005 Posted February 12, 2005 Originally posted by BrainRightHeartWrong don't believe everything a woman tells you! some women would say anything to manipulate a man! Don't believe anything ANYONE tells you IF it's not followed up with ACTIONS..
Nemisis Posted February 12, 2005 Posted February 12, 2005 You all I am feeling really down right now. I have been strong the since wednesday night when we last talked and I told her I didn't want to be friends. I'm starting to think that maybe I made the wrong choice, becuase to have a relationship you have to be friends first. And to talk as friends would be the only way we wouldn't go back into a relationship with problems. I mean I can't see why I should wait for her to come calling me wanting to be my girlfriend but then get back together and have the same problems we have always had. I think I should start talking to her again, what do you all think?
upsetnhurt Posted February 12, 2005 Posted February 12, 2005 Acid, Go ahead and call. Call her everyday if it makes you feel better. Maybe you will prove us all wrong and succeed at convincing her that she can't make a decision without your input. Best of luck and I know its hard.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 13, 2005 Author Posted February 13, 2005 I have completely fell apart. I called my ex yesterday a couple times and she never answered. I even left her a voice mail saying I wanted to talk but she has never called. She is in town this weekend and hasn't even tried to get ahold of me. I'm so hurt and depressed, I tried calling again this morning without success. I am thinking about emailing her. I have nothing left
upsetnhurt Posted February 13, 2005 Posted February 13, 2005 Acid, No need to be depressed. Go ahead and call her 100 times more and maybe send another 100 emails. Ironically, you are succeeding in pushing her further away from you. Why do think she would want someone that apparently can't stand on his own two feet and live life?
upsetnhurt Posted February 13, 2005 Posted February 13, 2005 Acid, No need to be depressed. Go ahead and call her 100 times more and maybe send another 100 emails. Ironically, you are succeeding in pushing her further away from you. Why do think she would want someone that apparently can't stand on his own two feet and live life?
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 13, 2005 Author Posted February 13, 2005 Well I have been and will continue to do so if needed. I texted her a little while ago and asked her to call me and she did. She said she didn't get my calls (which she probably was lying) and sounded really hateful about things, and didn't want to talk. I asked her if she has thought about me and she said she don't want to talk to me about that, and then said she was going to go. So I said ok, she said she might call me later and I said it's whatever you want.
upsetnhurt Posted February 13, 2005 Posted February 13, 2005 Acid, She certainly sounds like someone who is madly in love with you. Did you ever think you would turn into a stalker?
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 I got out with some friends tonight. They said they heard Audra and I broke up and I told them yeah. One of them said he was talking to her last night at a birthday party (she was in town) and when he asked about me and what I was doing she just answered it as if she knew and never told him once that we had broke up. Why do you think this is? Do you think she is completely over me? By the way I got out and went to a Valentines Dinner at my church, it was fun. And then me and a bunch of guys went a played ball at the gym. I've had a great night, but she has still been on my mind off and on. I'm doing good right now though although you know how unstable I can become. I can't believe 10 minutes from now I can be wanting to call her up, i'm such a mess.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 14, 2005 Author Posted February 14, 2005 Well I sent my ex a valentines email today, with a poem attached. I told her that I knew it was best the we broke up and that I wanted her to be happy. If you have nothing positive to say about this then don't post, I myself feel great and intend to even though I know I won't get/and don't want a reply. You all have a great Valentine's Day!!
fundamental Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 Originally posted by acidrein_08 Well do any of you have any ideas of winning her back? I just texted her and told her g'luck on a test that I knew she had coming up today but she hasn't responded yet. Tomorrow would be our 1 year and 3 months, and Valentines Day is coming up. I don't want to lose her for good. Well, if you keep contacting her without giving her any kind of space, you are NOT going to win her back!!!! You have to listen to the posters on this board. They are giving you meaningful advice because they have been in your situation. DO NOT contact her, you are digging your own grave. Leave her alone, and trust me, if there is a chance of getting back together, she will contact you. It has happened to me many times....3 to be exact.
davedawgaz Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 Hey y'all. I hope you had a good Valentines Day. I am crushed. I miss her so much that I am literally so f***ing tired of thinking about it. But No Matter what I do I can't stop thinking about her. I made a deal with my step Mom that I would not call. She tells me if I do not call her or be in contact with her she garuntees that she will call in the next ten Days. My Mom said if I call it doesn't give her time to miss me and remember the good things. So we made a bet. My step mom is convinced that my Ex (Sylvia) will call in the next ten days because she misses me. So if she calls, I owe my step Mom dinner and If she doesn't call she has to take me out to eat. I really hope I have to buy her dinner! But I am asking all of you, my new found friends and supporters, not to let me call. Please help me guys. I can use as much of it as possible. I really believe in my mom. She said if I give her time she will come back around, but I need your help to not be in contact. If you all have any suggestions or helpfull advise please help. Thank You everybody. OH, Acid. You need to not call. I know it makes you feel good but it is just a temporary fix. Be strong we can help eachother. If you call it doesn't let her miss you and it doesn't let her wonder about you. I can tell U are a great guy. She will realize it if you let her, but if you are always pushing it she has no time to think.
davedawgaz Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 This is hard, I know this. I really wish there was that one button to push to fix it all but there is not. I feel for you because if you are feeling anything like me you are miserable. We can do this. We can be happy. If we show our Exes how much we love them and care for them by not calling, they will come back. We have to not look desperate eventhough we are. Look, my email adress is [email protected]. I will give you a call if that is cool with you. If not OK. but you can email me your number and I will call.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 15, 2005 Author Posted February 15, 2005 Hey Dave, way to keep positive bro. I have had a great Valentine's day by myself and I am still glad I emailed my ex. I have given her time to miss me and she isn't going to and I have accepted that, I am doing good right now at being strong and will try to continue to do so. I know there are plenty more people out there and that we will both be happy one day. Thanks for offering an ear Dave, good luck to you also and HappY Valentine's Day.
davedawgaz Posted February 15, 2005 Posted February 15, 2005 Acid, dont think she doesn't miss you. If you were together for over a year, she can't just go on like that. I am pretty sure that she misses you. I went and bought a diamond ring for Sylvia on sunday to give to her yesterday, but she said she can't take it right now she said we need to be apart right now because her Dad is really mad at both of us. And he needs to get over that before we can talk again. But my patients runs short and I feel like I am about to break down every second of everyday since this has been going on. I really miss her, I really hope she misses me too. I really wish I could be with her again. I never had so much fun with a single person.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 16, 2005 Author Posted February 16, 2005 Dave i'm in the same boat as you and we both know it. I sent my ex an email on Valentine's Day but I didn't get a response. But last night after I had fallen asleep my ex texted me and asked if I got her message. I said what message? She said she emailed me. SO i went down and checked it and she wished me happy Valentine's Day and apoligized for ruining everything, but told me she knew we would be fine. SO i called her (dunno why) and told her I got it. We talked for a little bit, nothing big and then she sounded like she had no emotion, showed no feeling for me anymore so we got off the phone. I texted her and told her I was sorry for calling her. She texted back and said it was alright. Well get this, I called her again this morning and we talked for a little while, she apoligized some more and I asked if she had thought about me and she said she has been really busy. She told me that I can call whenever I want to be friends but that is all and I told her she could call when she became herself again. Then we got off the phone. How can she feel absolutely nothing so soon after the breakup? I really want a new girlfriend.
davedawgaz Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 Acid, she is acting emotionless because she is trying to be strong. She is not ove the whole thing and she still obviously cares. Dont assume anything. Odds are she feels sad inside like you do. She continues to initiate the contact, but then you get all excited and call, and text and email. Dont get all excited or things will keep blowing up in your face like this. Show her you are happy either way. A girl wants a happy guy, not a sad guy. If you guys have been through alot together she will not forget and she will realize how special you really are. Dont say you want another girlfriend yet. Imagine being with someone else. Holding their hand and it doesnt feel the same or anything like that. You are saying that because you think it will help you get over her. It could just make you miss her more. Answer this. Would You rather have your Ex back or find someone new?
upsetnhurt Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 Dave and Acid, You guys are thinking too much here and making yourselves crazy! Of course they care or they would not have gone out with you in the first place. Yet dating takes more than care to survive and what you have seen is your ex's did not want to put that additional effort into both of you. There is nothing wrong with that and you both will become stronger people for it. EVERY RELATIONSHIP does not work out guys......did either of you ever have a girlfriend prior to your past ex's? What happened then and how did you get over it? Time heals all and you both need lots of time so please REFRAIN from initiating contact. Acid, you have posted on other threads and you very competent and have given others the same advice you need to take, which is relax and live your life and let everything take care of itself.
davedawgaz Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 I had numerous girls before her. And to be honest she wanted me more than I did in the begining. Her friend tells me that she cries alot because she misses me, but her dad can be a real ass and keep us apart. I am really confused Here.
Nick14 Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 Acid, I have to vouch for Merin, that woman knows what she's talking about and I belive she's from Cali like I am and we both went thru the same things. Mine for example, boy if I was you man, I would step away. I was in a 2.5 year relationship, she was the one I wanted to marry and we were so in love very deeply. I made some mistakes but of course i was immature and not grown up. This past summer, I grew up and started to be who I needed to be to keep the relationship going and make it stronger. Boy, I thought it worked out in August, the dinners, the roses, our 2.5 year aniversary alot of stuff, any women would love in a man and any man who loved a woman would do that. Funny how we talked about trips a day before the bombshell and how we were both excited about those trips. My point is Acid, I made the mistake of freaking out and bugging her for at least 3 or 4 weeks, not every day but here and there, it just pushed her away and she never responded. Since October, she has ignored me since then or has never contacted me. I didn't do any contact for a month and then in December I sent her a happy grad e-card and a happy holidays e-card, no lovey dovey stuff just "happy holidays". I saw her at the gym a few times but no hi or nothing, but of course she saw me leave and saw me and peeled out ofthe parking lot and then proceded to call me a stalker(wrongly accused actually) on aim on her away message and I just blew a gasket and said thats that and IM her back and said every word in the book, I don't like being crossed for something I never even did. A week later, knowing who I really am, I sent her a e-card apologizing and hoping we can just work things out and I just want her to be happy and start being civil and grow up for once. I got no reply but I know she read it, with a auto-read response. Bottom line is, Acid you need to pull away or you will just push her away. My experience sucks, I mean I love her alot before and considered her a soul mate but god damn I never thought I would freak out, I wish I would of played it cool, said what I said and just walked away and have her contact me when she has her head on straight. Go watch the movie called Hitch man, he played it cool when he got dumped.
davedawgaz Posted February 16, 2005 Posted February 16, 2005 That was a good point. I just kept bothering and it pushes her away. You need to treat it like a broken leg. If you play on it or use it, it will just get worse and take longer to heal. If you saty off it and give it time, it will heal and be stronger than before.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 17, 2005 Author Posted February 17, 2005 You all I have been strong! I continue to not be depressed since Sunday when I was at an all-time low. I have started moving on, but last night she texted me just to ask if I got her email? I mean wtf, I didn't do that to her. So yes I did respond to her becuase I am not mean and can't see myself ignoring her. She has been the one to initiate contact and I feel so stupid for ever talking to her. You all think the best thing would be to ignore her completely, emails, texts, phone calls, everything?
davedawgaz Posted February 17, 2005 Posted February 17, 2005 NO!!! That is f***ed up. Does she completely ignore you? NO she does not. Remember when she text you. Then you start calling all the time. Don't due that. If she calls anser if you are not busy. If you are busy, tell her to call back in a little while. She obviously still has an attatchment. She still calls. She still wants to hear your voice. But don't let her control the situation, and by chance if she ever mentions going out again, tell her you don't think you want to because you don't want to be hurt like this again. See how she reacts, it will flip it all around. But in the meantime, stay in contact with us and we will behere for you. Cool.
Author acidrein_08 Posted February 18, 2005 Author Posted February 18, 2005 I am just posting to say I am doing well and have been for 5 days now. I have filled up all the empty space that used to go to my ex with other activities and hanging out with the good old boys. I am happy and content and right now am pretty much lovin being single. I wish to tell everyone here on Loveshack.org that there is light at the end of the tunnel! I thought by now i would have fallen back into depression and longing over my ex but after realizing that it really is over I have moved on with my life and am enjoying it. Don't let one day be wasted, make this your day to start over. There are so many people out there you are sure to find one that will be everything you ever wanted! Now go get'em!
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